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Worried about lack of confidentiality at DCs preschool

(8 Posts)
keepcalmandeatcake Wed 27-Jul-11 18:52:49

If you are reading this despite my v. boring thread title then thank you.

My DC1 has just finished two happy, untroubled terms at our local preschool. He is moving onto school in Sept and DC2 is expecting to follow in his brother's footsteps starting preschool in Jan. However recently a couple of things have made me a bit hmm about the preschool.

At the recent leavers assembly the nursery manager gave each child a book and tried to say a bit about each child. When she got to one boy she said he was a 'real monkey and his Reception Class teacher had better keep an eye on him'. I was embarrassed for his parents and thought it was a shame she hadn't found one nice thing to say about their son. Since then I have been told by a friend that this teacher went through a list of pupil names with her discussing the children's behaviour. My DC1 was apparently a very good boy but what if DC2 turns out to be 'a monkey'. I'd be happy to be told if he has problems but would expect this to be between me and the nursery staff. I have also been told she had a good moan about working mums. I am a SAHM but still think this is unprofessional.

So what would you do? Would you be looking at other preschools? Would you have a word or would you not be too bothered?

I've got to dip out for a short while and do bathtime but will pop back soon and am grateful for any thoughts.

ragged Wed 27-Jul-11 18:56:36

I would do nothing if my child was otherwise happy there.
It wouldn't offend me if my child was called a monkey. Especially if it were true.
A lot depends on what kind of things were said about behaviour, though, how specific or negative they were.

moaningminniewhingesagain Wed 27-Jul-11 19:00:59

I wouldn't be surprised at all is DS was described by his preschool as being a 'real monkey' and I wouldn't feel it was insulting him TBH. There is nothing DH and I would hate more than to think we have utterly compliant stepford children grin

The moaning about working mums - it would depend what she was moaning about IMHO. If she is moaning that they pick up late or send the children when ill, that's not exclusive to working mums. I would be very uncomfortable if she was preaching that mothers shouldn't work outside the home though.

keepcalmandeatcake Wed 27-Jul-11 19:14:31

I really don't mind friends/familly calling my children monkeys, they certainly aren't angels, but I would expect a more thoughtful comment from a professional in front of a room full of parents at what is suppossed to be a celebration of sorts.

moaningminnie - I get what you mean about late pick ups etc although I think this would be a moan to take up with the late-comers not another mum. I also think her point was actually that the better behaved children had SAHM would I think would be rubbish and I am a SAHM.

InstantAtom Fri 29-Jul-11 19:58:31

I agree that you wouldn't expect these comments in front of other parents.

mrz Mon 08-Aug-11 08:29:50

I would expect all pre schools to be sharing information with reception teachers. I'm more concerned that your friend has been discussing other children with the pre school teacher hmm am I missing something?

LIZS Mon 08-Aug-11 08:35:27

She's your friend ? hmm Did she discuss the children with the teacher for a reason or was it among staff and she thinks she has some tittletattle .

mnistooaddictive Mon 08-Aug-11 08:57:25

I would be concerned if the teacher discussed other children with a mum. That is out if order. My dc go to a very small preschool and they never mention other children by name, even though 90% of the time you know exactly who they are talking about!

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