To have an abortion

[mylifenow27]

I have a 4 month old, I have just realised I'm pregnant after only having sex about 3 times since baby was born.

I have 3 other children under 8 and 2 of them have a 14 month gap and it killed me.

I thought whilst breast feeding I couldn't get pregnant. Stupid I know 🙈 can I even have an abortion while bf.

I think an abortion will break my heart, but I'm worried another baby will break me.

Partner is supportive either way.

[PurpleDaisies]

You might be better posting on the pregnancy choices board. AIBU can get a bit rough on topics like this.

[ChardonnaysPrettySister]

It’s your body and your decision.

[mylifenow27]

Thanks, will ask for it to be taken down an re post

[mylifenow27]

Can anyone advise me on how to ask for it taking down from my phone?

[Missingstreetlife]

Ill report it for you. Entirely your çhoice. Get contraception set up before you chance it again. Good luck

[Dairymilkmuncher]

YANBU do what's best for you and the children you already have.

[MichaelMumsnet]

Thanks for the reports. We've moved this to the Pregnancy choices area now.

[Yarboosucks]

I struggled to have one baby and would have loved more, but I fully sympathise with your dilemma and you should trust yourself to make the right decision for you and your family. Don't let anyone beat you up either way.

[InsertFunnyUsername]

You should do whatever is best for you and your children, whatever that turns out to be will be right for you. I will say it's a decision you need to make by yourself, abortion talk brings out the judgemental people. Only you know if you will cope.

[Decadoma]

This is such a tough decision either way - try not to beat yourself up. It sounds like you have a lot on your plate as it is so I can understand why you are considering it. Speak to the family planning folk. They mau be able to arrange counselling to help you decide. And if you do decide on a termination try and arrange counselling for after. I get where you are at - at 48 I'm terrified of an accidental pregnancy and would struggle whatever i decided. I'm happy to hear your partner is supportive. Be very honest with each other and good luck whatever you decide.

[1ToughCookie]

I agree with previous poster: speak to family planning and do all you can to see a counselor before/after to support your decision. Absolutely not a choice to be made lightly/quickly.

[Voiletgold]

I think if you have any doubt at all about an abortion then don't do it. Obviously you have to make the best decision for you and your family. But you really have to think about living with that decision for the rest of your life and that's not easy.

[timshelthechoice]

Of course you can have a termination whilst breastfeeding. You need to make the best decision for you. You can also have a coil fitted whilst you are under GA for a termination if you'd like. It's very short-acting anaesthetic.

[Fgsdl]

This is a very hard decision. You definitely need to talk to a professional. And if you feel comfortable talk to a close friend or your partner, they would know your situation very well and be able to advise. If it would break your heart it could be a decision that would have a lasting affect on you but not having an abortion could also affect your mental healthy equally.

Only you can make the decision

[timshelthechoice]

Oh, FFS, children costs loads! She already has 4 of them. There's no guarantee another one will be healthy or that children will live close enough to visit parents when they're old or 'lots of joy' or that siblings will be friends or that older children should be expected to help out with more and more sprogs. She doesn't want another child! Plenty of people regret having another child and plenty don't regret terminations at all.

[Moomin8]

@mylifenow27 I would give yourself some time to figure out what you most want to do

[isadoradancing123]

Do not listen to or be led by emotional outpourings of drivel

[mylifenow27]

Thank you for everyone comments. After a long talk with my husband to be and family we have decided to carry on with pregnancy.

Once I got over the shock we discussed about the facts

We would of wanted one last one anyway
We are financially stable enough to provide for it easily
We won't need hardly anything
As he runs his own business flexibility is easy.
We already have a house and car big enough for everyone.

Even tho I am apprehensive I think we would both regret a termination. An something I do remember from the others is the days are sometimes long but the years are short.

Our older children at 7,5 and 4 and incredibly close and although at points it's been tough. The bond they have has made it worth it. So I think it will be nice for the youngest to have a close sibling. But I am under no illusion that it will be easy.

I am incredibly lucky to be in a position to be able to have another baby without needing to worry about normal issues, but I do know not to take this for granted as I've been the mum scraping around to by bread at Aldi not so many years ago!

[mylifenow27]

Oh an to add my tubes will be tied with this one and he's getting the snip ASAP after birth we are not taking any chances again xx

[sweetkitty]

I was just thinking that, once this ones born sort out your contraception lol. I have four and after the fourth was born DH was booked on straight away for for the snip. It’s very liberating to have sex without the fear of pregnancy.

Oh and congratulations hope you have a good pregnancy

[Pinkybutterfly]

Xxxx congratulations then. I will be taught but I agree that with the kids so close it's a lot easier specially if you have support.

[DocusDiplo]

So many children . Shudder. You sound happy though so congrats

[Yarboosucks]

Congratulations! So glad that you have come to a conclusion. I envy your fertility!!!! I hope it is an easy pregnancy; cherish your last one!