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Help! I don’t know what to do :(

(2 Posts)
Mgxo Sat 26-Jan-19 10:08:04

So I currently have a little boy with my ex partner, we were together when I found out and he was over the moon. We broke up just after my little boy turned 1 and it was quite a nasty break up. He had a new partner and so did I, neither relationships worked out and we ended up in bed together a few times.
I always thought we were careful and used condoms but one night when we were both really drunk, stupidly we didn’t! Things ended quite badly between us again.
I have found out I am pregnant now, and I really don’t know what to do sad

I told my little boys dad (and the baby’s dad) and he thinks I should abort the baby, we are in a really bad place again the last few weeks, he can be such a horrible nasty person at times. Never physically but verbally he’s so abusive, he swears at me all the time, tells me I’m a bad mum (when I know I’m a good mum to our son) he barely spends any time with his son, whenever my son goes to visit him he dumps our son on his mum and dad while he goes out or goes and see’s his new gf that he has been with for 6 days?!
He does little things to hurt me, such as introducing said gf to our little boy this weekend already (despite only knowing her for 6 days), he tells me he loves her etc, so he’s just not a nice person.

He is 100% about an abortion, he is pressuring me to make a decision, ringing me every few hours asking if I’ve made a decision yet? I only found out yesterday and I’m really not ready to make such a big decision so quickly.
How do I know what to do? Any advice would be great?
If it was our first baby I would 100% abort because I don’t him in my life; but he’s in my life either way. I don’t know if I could ever look at my little boy knowing I aborted his little brother/sister. It’s breaking my heart trying to make this decision I really don’t know what to do

Please help sadsad

a334 Sat 26-Jan-19 11:06:31

Don’t let him pressure you. All that ringing you every few hours is not needed. He’s not giving you time to think or process things, that’s why he’s calling you so much because he doesn’t want to give you any time think about keeping it!

This is ultimately your decision. You need to weigh things up. If he’s not a great dad to your son now, what will he be like when you have another? Also the abuse, you shouldn’t have to deal with that and it’ll probably get worse if you keep this one.

Are you physically and mentally ready for another child? Do you want another?

Do you think you could cope throughout the pregnancy with no support from your ex and also the fact that he’s got another gf and rubbing it in your face, telling you he loves her when he’s been with a few days!

if you’re thinking of keeping it, don’t be discouraged because you’re in a bad place atm because things might seem bad now but if you really try hard to make changes in your life, things will start to be good. Some things can be a blessing in disguise.

I don’t want You to think I’m trying to tell you what to do, just weigh up the pros and cons xxx

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