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This topic is for personal experiences or dilemmas; to debate the ethics of termination, please go here or here.

Unexpected 4th pregnancy

(14 Posts)
LumpySpaceCow Sun 02-Apr-17 17:21:36


99% sure I'm pregnant with my 4th. I've had two extremely faint lines (that faint that dh couldn't even see!). Have a very regular 28 day cycle (ovulate around day 15) however, it seems that I ovulated on day 22 this cycle so my period would now be due later so am going to retest on that day due to faintness of tests but am pretty sure I am as I also have symptoms.
I am just so torn. My youngest 2 are 1 and 2 and I have a school aged child. 3 is hard work and expensive, although I love them and they are a blessing.
If we had a fourth, we would manage. We would find a way.
On the other hand though, I don't want to be pregnant (my last pregnancy was horrendous). I don't want to have another section (had two). We would manage financially but it would be tight - especially child care. I don't want more sleepless nights. However, these just seem like selfish reasons.
Then again, this is our fault. If we really didn't want to get pregnant then we would have used a condom or taken MAP (we were a bit drunk at the time and when I realised how far in my cycle I was I thought I would be fine) or my husband would have had the vasectomy he was booked to have last year.
Thanks if you've followed this. I don't even know what I'm asking. Just for experiences from anyone who has been in a similar situation maybe?

Wishiwasmoiradingle2017 Sun 02-Apr-17 17:26:02

I had 4 under 7 and a year between 3+4. Wasn't that hard going from 3-4tbh. .
2 pairs to play together. No middle child.
A hand each for you and dh.

HalfCarrot Sun 02-Apr-17 17:56:16

Most people who post this kind of thing sound like they really don't want a baby and you sound like you kind of do... if you go through with it, it will be ok. Pregnancy is miserable but at least you know that in advance.

LumpySpaceCow Fri 07-Apr-17 16:22:29

Well, I'm definitely pregnant. Have an appointment with Marie Stopes. I am still torn but a 4th child just seems unmanageable - physically, financially and emotionally.
I have always been pro-choice regarding termination but just never thought I would ever consider one myself.

AltheaThoon Wed 12-Apr-17 15:55:39

Good luck op. Whatever you decide will be the right decision but it might not necessarily feel 'right'. flowers

LumpySpaceCow Thu 13-Apr-17 22:50:46

Thanks Althea!
I thought I would update as I read and searched so many of similar titled threads that it may help someone else.
Well, I made the appointment but it just didn't feel right and I knew that it wasn't the right choice for us. So, we are continuing with the pregnancy and I now feel good about our choice. We will just wing it!

Decsbetterhalf Thu 13-Apr-17 22:53:58

Congratulations OP ....

AltheaThoon Fri 14-Apr-17 10:32:37

Congratulations Lumpy. smile

Pastaagain78 Fri 14-Apr-17 10:39:22

Lovely news

Justmadeperfectflapjacks Fri 14-Apr-17 10:43:56

If it makes it sound more manageable for you op - 4 was a breeze looking back now I have 11!!

Valentine2 Fri 14-Apr-17 10:47:22

We have so much going on in our lives now that any more children are off the cards. Both me and husband are sure we want one or two more though. And I always open threads like yours OP and feel insanely jealous. envy grin
I have to wait a few years yet. Lots of congratulations. flowers

Valentine2 Fri 14-Apr-17 10:48:31

Did you write 11!? Oh my God!

LumpySpaceCow Fri 14-Apr-17 17:17:02

Thanks very much everyone smile
And 11! Wow! 4 will be a piece of cake grin

questsabelletreetop Wed 03-May-17 16:34:31

4* was a breeze looking back now I have 11!!*

You have ELEVEN??

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