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This topic is for personal experiences or dilemmas; to debate the ethics of termination, please go here or here.

Feeling worried

(4 Posts)
29greenbottles Wed 25-Jan-17 10:35:02

Hi all,
I had originally posted this on another board and someone kindly pointed me over here. I have just found out that I am pregnant again. I have 2 wonderful girls who are aged 3 and 5 and life has only just seemed to be settling down again. If I had found out a few months ago, I would have no hesitation in being happy but I feel like I have moved in my head a little bit. I am over 40 and worried about the impact that a 3rd will have on our family. Things are only just starting to become slightly easier financially as my business is picking up and I don't know how we would manage if I had to take time off. Dh is not keen for a third but the thought of having an abortion makes me wonder if I could ever get over something like that... I don't know what to do. I'm a mess..... sad

MrsNutella Thu 26-Jan-17 12:26:23

Hi OP. First be gentle with yourself. Don't forget you're probably also in the grips of those lovely early pregnancy hormones and that makes life hard enough, without throwing a hard decision in on top.

How are you doing? How do you feel about your options?

29greenbottles Sat 28-Jan-17 21:07:48

Thanks for replying - my head is still in a bit of a spin tbh. I went to the drs and just cried for half an hour, she gave me some good advice about not jumping too far ahead just now and thinking about the immediate decision. I am booked in for a scan a week on Tuesday and a counselling session and then I can make my mind up from there. I am so torn, in my heart I think I can't go through with a termination and always wanted 3 but a baby would affect us all in so many ways just when we thought we were feeling a bit more settled. I feel so stupid, I'm a grown, married woman....x

MrsNutella Tue 31-Jan-17 21:20:34

bottles if you have a look through the posts in here I'm actually just a few weeks ahead of you. I would love three but the two I have are extremely strong willed and demanding (they are 4 & 2). I'm also not in a great place mentally. There were so many factors involved.
In the end I made the decision to terminate. It still breaks my heart honestly; but it was the right decision for me. It isn't easy, sadly not at all!

Try, really hard, to put you first. Then your family. Where does that leave you?

I hope today has gone well for you and hasn't been too hard. flowers

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