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This topic is for personal experiences or dilemmas; to debate the ethics of termination, please go here or here.


(15 Posts)
Advicepls7080 Wed 10-Aug-16 10:25:47


Sorry if this doesn't go here but I'm not sure where it goes and I'm in a panic.

I've just found out I'm pregnant despite the fact I've been on cerelle.. Not missed one not been sick no antibiotics etc.

I have one child already (11 months) and I really cannot cope with another I have mental health issues that would make having another just impossible for me and I'm currently going into my final year at uni.

Please keep in mind I'm not a child/teen I'm in my late 20s but had lots of stuff go on in my life that delayed my education!

Anyway how do I go about having an abortion? I'm so scared to google, I have severe anxiety and I'm a hypochondriac I'll google the risks of dying more than anything else I can't help myself sad

I have no one to talk to about this as my other half has decided to fuck off smile (just this Saturday gone)

Any advice is welcome.

Please don't judge me sad

AgentJ Wed 10-Aug-16 10:31:16

I've been dealing with BPAS recently as we're also unexpectedly, and inconveniently, pregnant. I spoke to my GP recently too and she advised that self referral to BPAS is the quickest option. I am booked in for a consultation tomorrow and only rang yesterday. They have been kind, understanding, professional and very compassionate. The treatment is NHS funded but you can choose where it takes place.

flowers be kind to yourself.

Advicepls7080 Wed 10-Aug-16 11:45:34

Thank you they're going to give me a call back later on today!

Wish I never googled risks now having the worst panic attack sad

scaevola Wed 10-Aug-16 11:48:34

I've reported your post to MNHQ to ask them to move it to 'Pregnancy Choices' (rather than leaving it here in 'contraception' where it might not be spotted by posters with the relevant expertise).

I hope you find the support you need, both here and in RL.

KatherineMumsnet (MNHQ) Wed 10-Aug-16 14:12:55

We're just going to move this Pregnancy Choices, OP, where we hope you'll find some great support. flowers

MatildaOfTuscany Wed 10-Aug-16 14:26:20

flowers So sorry you find yourself in this situation. Contraceptive failure happens even to the most careful, it's just one of those things.

And step away from Dr. Google - it will not do you any favours. (And remember the risks of abortion are orders of magnitude smaller than the risks of going through with pregnancy and childbirth - medically supervised abortion, whether pharmaceutical or surgical, in a country where it is legal, which it is in mainland UK, is a very safe procedure).

pursuedbyabear Wed 10-Aug-16 14:32:40

I second bpas, I also used them when pg with a similar age gap. They were very professional and helpful.

Advicepls7080 Wed 10-Aug-16 14:43:24

I have spoke to BPAS and I have an appointment next week.

Pursued if it's straight forward, am I given the first pill on the day of my appointment for do I come back for the first pill then again 2 days later for the second? I have an exam two days after my first appointment and worried about the logistics of it all!

Pootles2010 Wed 10-Aug-16 14:52:28

I think your first appointment will just be a chat, to check you understand and to talk it all through. Mine was very straightforward, they were very nice. If i remember rightly once you've had that appointment, they then look to getting you booked in?

Other will be able to confirm this, but I'd be amazed if they give you pill at your first appointment. Mine was surgical though so perhaps a bit different.

Re your course, I had mine in my second year, and told my tutor, she was lovely about it and gave me an extension - is there someone you could talk to, just for a bit of support from Uni?

AgentJ Wed 10-Aug-16 15:11:18

It depends on your choice of medical/surgical termination. I've asked for surgical so my appt tomorrow is the consultation and the procedure will take place fully on the second appt.

Advicepls7080 Wed 10-Aug-16 15:49:46

I'm resitting exams I missed when I was giving birth haha so I can't hold them off any longer (typical)

I'm having the pill hopefully so I'm hoping they can give the pill the same day, some people online have said the first pill is same day but obviously surgical won't be same day!

pursuedbyabear Mon 15-Aug-16 03:58:10

I also had surgical but agree with others that nothing will be done at the first appt, I don't think it can be legally. So you will be able to pick a date that suits you but will end up going three times. You will need childcare as you can't take children there. The wait can be stressful but you have at least started the process.

Advicepls7080 Mon 15-Aug-16 06:02:19

It is being done on the first appointment smile BPAS phone call is your consultation. I received an email telling me it will all be done when I go in unless they have to send me to hospital due to underlying illnesses

pursuedbyabear Mon 15-Aug-16 22:44:29

That's good news, less waiting. Hope it goes well, it was certainly the best thing for me.

Advicepls7080 Tue 16-Aug-16 06:26:01

Thank you! Really scared now because it's getting closer but need to get it to the back of my mind or I'll fail my exam today sad

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