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Abortion scan please please help desperate

(514 Posts)
tryingtobestronger Tue 09-Aug-16 10:07:22

I went for a scan yesterday, assuming Id be having my abortion on Wednesday and Thursday of this week.

My lmp dates suggest im just over 7 weeks.

My scan showed I was around 5. They said I need to go back in two weeks time to redo the scan as they need to see a embryo and all they saw was a pregnancy sac (normal for 5 weeks).
I am so upset. Will I be over 9 weeks when I go back? Nurse said no- I will be around 7 weeks.
What date did your scan go by?
I'm really struggling, have no one to talk to and I'm so confused . Please someone help im begging you.

ProcrastinatingNow Tue 09-Aug-16 10:10:23

Why are they not doing it this week?

I had an abortion at 5 weeks flowers

tryingtobestronger Tue 09-Aug-16 10:11:47

I'm really struggling I can't cope with another two weeks of this. My husband is far away and o have one son. As we speak he's eating his breakfast looking at me with tears pouring down my face. Will this ever be over. Please someone talk to me please help

tryingtobestronger Tue 09-Aug-16 10:13:47

The nurse said they have to be able to see a viable pregnancy before they can do it. All that was on the scan was the pregnany sac and was dated aroumd 5 weeks. So in two weeks time it will be visible and they will go ahead.

I ovulate late , that would be when I conceived .

Do they go from lmp or dating scan though.
I can't stop crying and he's just looking at me.

ThymeForTea Tue 09-Aug-16 10:14:06

Maybe there is no embryo. This happens to people who want pregnancy, go for a scan and no baby X

tryingtobestronger Tue 09-Aug-16 10:16:13

No she said it's perfectly normal for around 5 weeks, the sac is measuring five weeks. Which dates back to when I conceived. But why were they going from lmp before the scan.

When I have the abortion in two weeks how many weeks will I be.

tryingtobestronger Tue 09-Aug-16 10:17:19

My husband is not talking to me either and he lives abroad . I don't have any friends. Just work people who I'm not close enough to.

Cliffdiver Tue 09-Aug-16 10:19:42

Scans are more reliable than dates for dating pregnancies.

When is your husband back?

tryingtobestronger Tue 09-Aug-16 10:19:56

He never felt more frightened and alone. I feel like running away

ProcrastinatingNow Tue 09-Aug-16 10:20:01

It sounds like you're being very hard on yourself. If an abortion is definitely what you want then 7 weeks is still quite early.

tryingtobestronger Tue 09-Aug-16 10:20:48

My husband is never back. Visa issues means he can't come here. I don't know when I'll next see him. I love him so much

tryingtobestronger Tue 09-Aug-16 10:21:43

My son doesn't deserve this from me. He's such a happy good boy. And he knows and can see me struggling and falling apart

villainousbroodmare Tue 09-Aug-16 10:22:28

Would the clinic be able to recommend a counsellor if you rang them up now? You sound awfully distressed. Or what about your GP or practice nurse? You sound like you need some comfort and time to think. flowers

tryingtobestronger Tue 09-Aug-16 10:23:43

I was on the phone to them for an hour yesterday. She is a very lovely nurse. And tried to make me understand they can't do it at this early stage. But by lmp it's not early do avprtions go by scan dates or lmp dates

lampshady Tue 09-Aug-16 10:25:27

I'd try not to dwell to much on the two week difference between what you think and what they think. It's really not going to make any impact on what procedure you can choose.

Is this something you want?

villainousbroodmare Tue 09-Aug-16 10:25:29

I don't know.

selfishcrab Tue 09-Aug-16 10:25:30

This is standard, they don't do treatment until after 5 weeks and a few days and it's to make sure they can see the pregnancy and that it is in the right place.
The scan will be the right dates.
I would call the treatnment provider and see if you can speak to someone, most have in house counsellors.

Tanfastic Tue 09-Aug-16 10:26:20

I had an abortion at six weeks from a scan. They told me it couldn't be done any earlier, probably for the same reasons as they told you. It was over ten years ago though, things might have changed.

MrBoot Tue 09-Aug-16 10:27:45

You can have the abortion in another two weeks. I understand you just want it over with already but the medical centre has to confirm there is a viable pregnancy first.

Did you get pregnant with your husband or someone else? Why is your husband not talking to you?

If he is abroad and you can't speak or meet him, can you Skype? Do you have anybody else to talk to? Can you ask for abortion counselling? You sound very alone.

tryingtobestronger Tue 09-Aug-16 10:27:59

Honestly. I want my husband and my son. If I had those two together, then maybe just maybe a baby would be ok.

But the fact is I don't have my husband here to help. I don't want to have to give up my job, and do this by myself. I have my son. And I cope very well with him, we have fun and he's my best friend.
I do not want this baby it's not th right time and the waiting is killing me

Cliffdiver Tue 09-Aug-16 10:28:07

I second trying to get a GP appointment today, it sounds like you desperately need to speak with someone.

Do you have the option to be able to move to be with your husband?

Is there anyone who can look after your DS for a day or two?

tryingtobestronger Tue 09-Aug-16 10:29:10

Thank u everyone for talking to me

tryingtobestronger Tue 09-Aug-16 10:29:56

It's my husbands baby

tryingtobestronger Tue 09-Aug-16 10:32:46

I don't have the option of moving to him. Due to my son. The country isn't a place where Id want my son being brought up.

Visa stuff is in the pipeline but honestly I don't beleive it will ever work

StuffandBother Tue 09-Aug-16 10:34:31

You sound very upset, you obviously have lots of hormones coursing around at the moment so try to remember that is part of why you feel so panicked and stressed. In the nicest possible way, you need to pull yourself together for your sons sake, can you go out of the day with him? it sounds a shit situation but you have no choice but to deal with it. If you're very, very sure of when you conceived then is it a possibility then this may not be a viable pregnancy anyway and nature may take its course. Have you got any family you can talk to?

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