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This topic is for personal experiences or dilemmas; to debate the ethics of termination, please go here or here.

Abortion Advice (sorry for the sensitive subject)

(8 Posts)
FancyFrenchCake Mon 29-Jun-15 18:11:44

Have just found out I'm pregnant. I'm married, have a few children already & this was not planned sad. My youngest is a pre-schooler, and I have just started to feel like a human again (Im sorry if that's selfish, though its true). We have an unbelievably tight income, and are in a too small property as it is.

I am just asking if anyone has any advice on this please? I looked at both BPAS & Marie Stopes - both are very unaffordable for us, and I don't know what to do.

Also I am in 2 minds whether to get this organised as soon as possible (best way, I know) however I understand that before do many weeks it has to be a medical - which I heard is awful. I don't want to leave it too long though, both because I really don't want to prolong this, and also because I suffer severe Hyperemesis (all pregnancies - couple of each sex)

I apologise if I come across rather distant from this all, I'm not, I'm just trying to keep to facts as my head is in a spin right now.

redannie118 Mon 29-Jun-15 18:48:44

Hello Fancy please ring BPAS they have lots of private clinics that are contracted out to the NHS. They will ask for your postcode and will find the closest one to you, and waiting times are always considerably shorter than for a standard NHS app, plus its completely free. They will also give you excellent advice and support which is exactly what you need now. Please let us know how you get on .

Enormouse Mon 29-Jun-15 18:55:44

First of all, a massive hug for you. I arranged my termination for similar reasons.

Where are you living fancy? If it's NI or ROI I can point you towards some resources that can help you.

If I can be any help at all, please pm me.

WinterOfOurDiscountTents15 Mon 29-Jun-15 19:00:59

You might want to either get this moved, or just look at the "Pregnancy Choices" topic, there are many threads with some very good advice both practical and emotional, which you might find useful.
Best of luck.

FancyFrenchCake Mon 29-Jun-15 19:05:12

So do BPAS do this through the NHS then?

I live in England.

Will get this thread moved over to Pregnancy choices.

I feel like I am making the right decision for my family & me (including DH) I do have a little niggle though that I cant shake sad

Enormouse Mon 29-Jun-15 19:08:59

In England you can access an abortion through the nhs. Both at bpas and marie stopes.

Feeling conflicted is normal. Give yourself time. If you make the initial appointment with them, you can cancel at any point and it'll give you a few weeks to think things through. Either of those two clinic providers can arrange counselling.

Thurlow Thu 02-Jul-15 14:22:21

flowers French

You can get a termination on the NHS, with no cost. They refer you to BPAS or Marie Stopes. I had the same concerns as you because of the HG. I actually got an appointment for a medical termination 4 days after seeing the GP, though that was by travelling to a clinic quite far away. It wasn't ideal but at least it was quick, which was what I wanted.

I don't think that even if you are 100% sure that it is what to do, you're not going to have a niggle. Because it isn't a pleasant or happy thing to do, clearly. So you can be certain but still feel very upset and unhappy about having had to make the decision. You can be certain and still grieve for the baby.

If you do want to terminate, try and get a GP appt as soon as possible so they can refer you. But remember you can change your mind at any point, and please do take advantage of the counselling so that you can be sure you are making the right (or least wrong) decision.

ScoutandAtticus Thu 02-Jul-15 23:16:14

You don't have to go via your GP. You can self refer. Or at least that's what happens in my area. Both Marie Stopes and BPAS have helplines open late, if not 24 hours who will be able to advise if they offer abortions for the NHS for your area.

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