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You know your in the final weeks when....

(95 Posts)
cupcake78 Mon 20-May-13 10:50:00

You find yourself cleaning out the fridge sat on a birthing ball grin

Walking round the supermarket you merrily fart away because there is absolutely nothing you can do to stop it.

Every hour you scale Mount Everest (the stairs) to go to the loo expecting satisfaction when all you manage is an unsatisfactory drop but just enough for baby to push on your bladder even more than before.

TinkyPeet Mon 20-May-13 10:53:38

-trying to wrench little feet out from your ribcage!

Dillydollydaydream Mon 20-May-13 10:55:19

You can no longer see past your bump to shave your bikini area blush

oscarwilde Mon 20-May-13 10:55:53

Nothing, absolutely nothing "fits" and I use the term loosely except DH clothes and yoga/jogging bottoms

KookyKitty Mon 20-May-13 10:56:27

Your shopping list consists of pineapple, raspberry leaf tea and any other bizarre and unlikely thing that has the slightest possibility of starting things off!

cupcake78 Mon 20-May-13 10:59:17

You have a memory but cant remember how to use it or what it is!

Damn I forgot raspberry leaf tea and evening primrose oil while farting round the supermarket!

mildred37 Mon 20-May-13 11:11:52

You are up every hour in the night for the tiniest drop of wee, despite feeling like you've got a few litres in your bladder.

Bunnychan Mon 20-May-13 11:17:11

You're hoping the pains get stronger and more frequent.
You're scared to go more than 5 minutes away from home.
You are actually annoyed by people asking 'when is it due?'

ButteryJam Mon 20-May-13 12:06:15

Every morning you wake up thinking you may go into labour
You are willing to try anything to get labour started
You get annoyed when people ask you when's the baby coming
You actually look forward to getting contractions

megarobotdiscoparty Mon 20-May-13 12:30:49

you complain when it hurts....but when it stops hurting you REALLY start complaining.

rrreow Mon 20-May-13 14:52:46

Having trouble doing the dishes because I'm so far away from the sink. Also couldn't reach the phone on my desk earlier as it was too far back....

shelly81 Mon 20-May-13 15:01:58

Your mobile is going every 5 minutes with “have you had her yet?”. Ridiculous texts ... [Grin]

AllThatJazzAgain Mon 20-May-13 15:05:59

Loving this thread, at 38 and half weeks pregnant this all describes me to a tea!
Plus the constant checking every time I go to the bathroom for show etc!

eltsihT Mon 20-May-13 16:47:32

When people ask how you are,you respond with still pregnant.

forgetmenots Mon 20-May-13 17:04:41

Every twinge has you looking for your hospital bag
Checking loo roll for a show every time
Thinking about every invitation, not only now in 'access to toilets' but in 'miles from hospital'.
Panicking if you forget to take your notes out
Swelling like an old lady
Skin and libido of a teenager (maybe this is just me!)

gertrudestein Mon 20-May-13 17:10:42

YY to eltsihT!

kotinka Mon 20-May-13 17:15:36

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bowlingforsoup Mon 20-May-13 17:20:55

Im only 35 weeks but I struggle to get off the sofa, eat ice lollies for breakfast (nobody can tell me not to wink) have issues walking up the stairs every half hour for a wee when a tiny amount comes out and i dont feel relieved at all, I cry at anything and everything, I feel like the back end of a bus and struggle to sleep at night.

I can't wait until this baby is born.

Jojobump1986 Mon 20-May-13 17:34:45

You want to cry/shout at your sister expecting you to drive over an hour for her 2yo's birthday party less than a week before due date. (Just got the text: "Can you let me know that you will be able to come so I can confirm numbers." WIBU to reply "No I $&@% won't be able to come", given that she couldn't even be bothered to come see us when DS1 was born?!)

You want to cry/shout at anyone expecting you to do anything that either involves standing up or sitting down for any length of time.

You want to cry/shout for absolutely no reason.

You have to pause every time you stand up to get over the clunk as gravity drags the baby back into your pelvis.

Your hips/back/pelvis hurts if you sit still or lay down or move.

You've suddenly gone off the idea of having 4 children & 2 is the perfect number...

Every time you make plans you're secretly hoping you won't be able to make it.

If one more person has their baby before you, you might actually steal it until your baby arrives...! envy blush

CuppaSarah Mon 20-May-13 18:26:16

You want to throttle anyone who dares complain about how they feel within earshot.

People ask 'are you ok?' every time you stop to catch your breath, with a look of fear incase you're actually in labour.

Every braxton is the real thing.

The only thing that cheers you up, is when your less pregnant friends tlk about how tired and horrible they feel. Becuase you quietly feel smug knowing their time will come soon.

Jojobump1986 Mon 20-May-13 18:48:00

You contemplate actual violence when your DH comes home & complains that he got 'a bit stressed' today. Yeah, well I can hardly walk & nearly crippled myself making your dinner for you. Forgive me if I can't locate my tiny violin for you right now! <Rage, rage, rage> angry

fruitypie Mon 20-May-13 19:14:11

I'm only 33+2 abd reading these has actually made me howl with laughter....u thought i was struggling now...obviously i have a lot more to come

Bunnychan Mon 20-May-13 19:19:59

You 'eat your feelings' then wash it down with gaviscon x

ItsOkayItsJustMyBreath Mon 20-May-13 19:29:04

you grow a fabulously glamorous triple chin through water retention (this was the final straw for me).

forgetmenots Mon 20-May-13 19:32:25

Yy bunnychan smile

You never have bad breath even first thing in the morning as you've been up all night crunching indigestion tablets

Turning over in bed is equivalent to an eight-point-turn and should require a test

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