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Pregnancy

Don't want to tell anyone.......

18 replies

lazyeye · 12/06/2003 19:50

I'm pregnant for a 3rd time. I have an 8mth old and a 2 and half yr old. I'm still on mat leave from my job - which I love & who have been very good to me. I want this baby but feel stupid for getting caught so early....I never had a period after my 2nd son despite only bfeeding for 7 wks.
I feel a bit flat & stupid and haven't even told my mum....I'm about 7 wks now. Anyone had similar tale??????

OP posts:

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Katherine · 12/06/2003 19:58

Wow you must be feeling a bit shell-shocked. I'm expecting my third and didn't want to tell anyone but because of previous mc rather than feeling daft. You are not daft at all. Its one of those things. I ended up pg with DD when DS was only 10 months old because I thought my cycle had settled down and it hadn't. It happens. As long as you are happy about it then thats the main thing. There is no rush to tell anyone and when you do you will probably get a mixture of reactions anyway - people are insensitive like that, but if you are feeling rotten and tired then it might be worth telling your mum just so she can help out a bit. I didn't tell my mum until I was 21 weeks this time as I didn't want her taking the fun out of it. Perhaps you need to adjust to the idea a bit more to yourself before you share it. But congratulations anyway

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Lollypop · 12/06/2003 20:28

Congratulations. Not in a similar position myself, although I did do a test when DD was 3 months - I was most worried about what the people at work would have said. Know several people with under a year between their kids so you're not that unusual. There were 3 siblings in my year at school, an older girl and a set of twins. Hope it all works out

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meanmum · 12/06/2003 20:47

Congratulations. Don't worry about being caught out. It happens to people more often than you think. I'm sure you're work will be supportive as they have been so far. They will understand that even though this may not have been planned it is still a wonderful thing. Happened to one of the girls I work with and we were all happy for her rather than thinking anything bad. The company didn't once think it was an issue and I'm sure yours won't either.

Take time to get used to it yourself and then share the news. You don't want to be telling people when you have mixed feelings as when you look back you may worry about how you spoke to them about it.

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codswallop · 12/06/2003 20:49

hoorah hoorah for both of you.
I kepot my third secret from my dh for a while and I loved havingmy own secret!

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Ghosty · 12/06/2003 21:07

Congratulations! My mum never had a period after my brother was born and couldn't work out her dates until she had a bump ... my sister was born ON my brother's first birthday!!
I haven't told anyone (apart from the 10,000 members of mumsnet ) about my pregnancy ... I am 7 weeks too ... mainly because I had an M/C last year and I feel a bit precious about it ... I was very blase about the last pgy and told the world straight away ... it was very hard when I lost it to 'untell' everyone.... IYKWIM!!!

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meanmum · 12/06/2003 21:12

Ghosty, I've told everyone about this pregnancy and am hoping nothing goes wrong. I'm only just over 5 weeks at the moment. Nothing went wrong with ds and I have the best birthing hips in the world so I'm hoping nothing goes wrong with this one.

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beetroot · 12/06/2003 21:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

meanmum · 12/06/2003 21:19

Beetroot, I'll be looking to you for the reassurance of having them close together. Mine will be 2 years apart almost to the day which isn't as close as yours but there are already people saying how hard it's going to be etc. I figured for me I wanted to get it over and done with rather than draw it out and also have them close together so they could play with each other (hopefully).

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ames · 12/06/2003 22:10

I can relate to this in a way. DD is 16 months and DS 9 weeks. I told dh and bf straight away but didnt tell anyone else until I was about 4 months and didnt tell some people until I absolutly had to - MIL was told with 4 weeks to go (which turned out to be 2 weeks!) as you can guess we dont see her v. often! When I did tell people I felt silly and felt I had to explain myself and also justify myself! Now I feel that I have to cope really well so that no one else can say 'I told you so' and blame me although I'm finding it a bit of a struggle, but I think thats about the way I feel rather than the way other people feel if you get me drift.
Still, it can only get easier!

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lou33 · 12/06/2003 22:18

I know someone who discovered she was pg again when her baby was 6 weeks old!

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whymummy · 12/06/2003 22:50

congratulation lazyeye,when you dicide to tell people do it with a big smile and show them how happy you are that should stop any negative comments

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sobernow · 12/06/2003 23:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ghosty · 12/06/2003 23:39

Lazyeye ... FWIW I think having babie close together is a great thing ... there is less than 5 years between my two brothers, my sister and me. It was great for us (although tiring for my mum) as we were growing up ... always had a friend to play with etc ... As grown ups we are close (although we are scattered all over the world) and our children are all of similar ages ...
Meanmum ... didn't mean to put a dampner on your pg ... it is just how I feel at the moment ... I am positive your pg will be tip top ...

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jasper · 13/06/2003 00:15

My three are almost exactly the same spacing as yours but I did it on purpose.
It's great!
Congratulations!

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beetroot · 13/06/2003 09:10

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2under2 · 13/06/2003 11:22

congratulations, lazyeye! I also kept/keep my pregnancy secret for a good while (haven't told anyone other than close family yet really and I'm 17 weeks!). My other children are 2 & 3, and it just feels a bit mad... plus I'd always told everybody how I needed another baby about as much as a hole in the head.
This baby was conceived on the first cycle off the pill (stopped it but wasn't all that sure) - for the whole four weeks I was thinking that I'll start taking the pill again with my next period - which of course never took place!
So, anyway, I do find it difficult to tell people - it makes me look so inconsistent. Also feel weird about having 'so many' children.

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wobblymum · 13/06/2003 11:50

If you're happy then there's no reason why anyone else should be any different.

We're just about to have our first baby, a dd, any day now and we're already thinking about the next one because DH and I have always thought it would be nice to have small age gaps (and get it all over with in one go!). We were going to wait a few more years before starting a family at all though, but it didn't turn out that way! So it's going to be impossible to convince people we planned the 2nd one (when we do) and that we're not just very careless!!!!

Oh well, everyone has to do what they're happy with and let everyone else lump it!!

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lazyeye · 13/06/2003 19:59

Wow, thanks for all the msgs of support - I've been a silent listener to MN for a while now, this is the 1st time I've really posted a msg. Its good to know I'm not the only one with a family so close together. I'm sure I'll get me head round it. Thanks again......

Hey, anyone out there from Newcastle (on Tyne)