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Labour ward dilemma- who should really be there!

(10 Posts)
Mama2b5 Sat 07-Nov-09 16:55:59

Im really seeking some answers to a question that is bugging me! Mother-in-law is assuming she will be at my labour, but i really dont think im comfortable with her being there - slightly personal i believe!HELP ME PLEASE!

onadietcokebreak Sat 07-Nov-09 16:57:18

Whoever will support you best in labour. If you dont want her there and already feel uncomfortable with the concept of her being there tell her.

LadyOfTheFlowers Sat 07-Nov-09 16:57:59

hmm Would never have mine at a birth.
How rude to just assume.

I had my mother and DH at first, then DH for 2nd and 3rd and will have only DH for 4th in April.

rubyslippers Sat 07-Nov-09 17:01:07

why on earth would she assume that? i love my MIL but there is no way she would be at the birth

labour is not a spectator sport and it is very important that you feel comfortable with the people in the delivery room or it can actually stall the labour

my mum and DH were both at the births of my children - my choice and they were both brilliant

bamboobutton Sat 07-Nov-09 17:06:31

i thought most maternity wards only allow dh/dp to be there unless a special request is made(e.g. doula) otherwise the room just gets clogged up.

Mama2b5 Sat 07-Nov-09 17:17:09

Thanks all - my mum was always there but since she passed( still so freshsad) MIL is saying shes goin to be there, im cringing at the thought! and i feel the memory that i have of giving birth with my mum by myside will be spoilt!sad

lola0109 Sat 07-Nov-09 17:17:45

My MIL wanted to be in the waiting room at the birth of DD but I had to explain to her it wasn't like in america where they have plush waiting areas, I think she'd seen it on the TV. Eventually I went in the middle of the night so we didn't have to phone her.

I'd explain they don't like more than just birthing partner, blame mrsa/swine flu etc? if you don't feel comfortable telling the truth!

LadyOfTheFlowers Sat 07-Nov-09 17:23:01

I certainly wouldn't have her there then in that case.

So sorry for your loss. x

MistergodthisisSal Sat 07-Nov-09 17:23:59

Sorry to hear about your mother. sad

Perhaps your MIL is trying to be kind and assuming you might want a "mother figure" there? I realise that this might be awkward, but a nice chat (somewhere relaxed - perhaps invite her out for lunch with just the two of you) should solve this.

General answer to the question - I like only myself and dh there.

Mama2b5 Sat 07-Nov-09 17:38:58

Thank you all - speaking to DH maybe the way to go!

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