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now 25weeks and alone

(4 Posts)
emma1988 Mon 02-Nov-09 22:23:11

hi i am 25 wk pregnant and alone.
i kicked my husband out last week after finding him to be having an affair with another woman, i now find out they are already planning on getting a house together!
can i legaly stop my husband seeing my child alone once it is born whilst the other woman is around as she used to be a druggie and has tld me she wants baby dead! you here so much about things happening on the news these days i would never settle.
i have said he can see it when convinient with me but not with his new partner present.
he has said he is taking a month off work when baby born to be with it!
also he has agreed to pay me maintenance once baby is here,but will not provide any financial help or buy any items before it is born. can i do anything about this?

hope all this makes sense, i know what i want in my head but unsure if i can physically carry it out.

heron22 Tue 03-Nov-09 09:43:23

hi, i am so sorry that you are going thru this alone. it is better that you find out now than later. you and your baby deserve better than a man like him.

i am not sure if he is financially liable to provide for the baby before it is born. do you have access to a lawyer? do you have family to help you?

bigmuther65 Tue 03-Nov-09 10:09:43

Brought my first ds up alone meet my dh when he was 1 it is bloody hard but all so very rewarding i do feel we have a special bond because of this
Can't help on if he is expected to pay for the baby before it is born but make sure you contact the csa soon as possible .
It is your right for you to stop his new partner not to have any contact with your new baby and if he is any kind of father he should agree to this.
Bet the slime bag will come back grovelling soon
Good luck

BlueCollie Tue 03-Nov-09 12:09:31

I think you need to separate your ex partners behaviour towards you..which is appalling by the way..and what he might be like as a father. My partner is going through courts to gain contact with his 6 year old and it is the most horrible thing to watch as his ex is using his child as a pawn to get back at him. The one person who is missing out is his daughter. Your ex could be a great dad to yoru child....hard I know to see at this point. I think you are within your rights to ask for contact to take place between just him and your baby at first especially as you have no idea what he will be like with baby. In regards to trying to stop his partner seeing your baby I would keep a record of all the things she has said about your baby and I would make it clear that unless she improves her behaviour you will not be happy to allow her to see your child.
I know it must be very difficult for you at the moment but I would try very hard to be amicable about this as this is what will be best for your child. I have seen my friends split up and the ones that remained amicable despite hating each other have the best well adjusted happy children, the others who have used their kids and slagged off each other and there partners have kids that are confused, angry and unhappy.

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