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Swearing in labour...

(19 Posts)
MrsMc82 Sat 17-Oct-09 08:35:38

Hi everyone,
i'm only 26 weeks with dc1 so still mainly in denial about the whole giving birth thing but one thing that is bothering me is that i've got a really filthy mouth on me as part of my whole pregnancy grumpiness and i just can't help excessive swearing whenever i'm cross/stressed/upset.... So i'm wondering how much swearing is tolerated during labour.... Esp if it happens to be directed at the midwife? Obviously not going in with intention of calling them obscene swear words but it just can't be helped atm so getting a bit worried that they might throw me out or something.... Any advice??

hairyclaireyfairy Sat 17-Oct-09 08:39:09

Would think they would be used to it, I remember swearing quite a lot when in labour with my 1st. Don't think the midwife would tolerate any one else being abusive though.
Good luck

MrsSnoops Sat 17-Oct-09 08:49:54

I swore a lot during my labour. I was a little shocked with myself afterwards. I was also very loud. To be honest the midwives were not bothered at all, or if they were they didn't let on. They were more concerned with helping me birth my baby.
I would agree with the previous poster though, they won't put up with abuse. Although I suspect any bad language will be directed at your baby or other half.

DiamondHead Sat 17-Oct-09 09:03:24

I remember swearing in labour. It was subconcious swearing. The words just burst just burst out of me. Afterwards, I was embarassed when I saw my nice, kindly middle aged midwife. I think she's heard it before though.

Jennylee Sat 17-Oct-09 10:51:49

I swore a lot it all got noted in my birth notes and then they kept me in a week to make sure i did not have pnd!!!! without talking to my husband or even letting on at first. i had to go and expalin everything odd i said in labour to psych, and explain it bloody hurt and I had been given morphine, so was not entirely in my right mind.

woodhj Sat 17-Oct-09 11:00:28

I dont think they will throw you out whilst giving birth!

And i dont think when your in labour you will even care whats coming out of your mouth.

Apologies before hand for anything you might say and then lots after giving birth. They wont mind will probs be onto the next bad mouthed mother giving birth.

sweetnitanitro Sat 17-Oct-09 11:07:21

I swore like a sailor, you should have heard my reaction when I was told I couldn't have an epidural grin I wouldn't worry, the midwife will have heard it all before. As long as you are polite and grateful afterwards then it won't matter. Jennylea made a good point about the morphine, if you have it then it does make you trip out a bit.

NorbertDentressangle Sat 17-Oct-09 11:11:30

I think that a long as you're not directing it at the hospital staff in any way you should be OK. I'm sure there are very few swearwords that they've not heard.

When I had DD (my first) I apparently said very little throughout the quick labour until afterwards when, according to DP, I very calmly said "That f*cking hurt".

Similar story with DS too IIRC.

Iamamumma Sat 17-Oct-09 11:13:39

You might suprise yourself - I was sure I would f and blind my way through the whole thing, but I was very polite and Dh was mightly impressed that I managed it without cursing - I seem to remember apologising alot! I was very loud though! blush

Alina77 Sat 17-Oct-09 12:48:18

Girls, that is hysterical, have not laughed like that for a long time!

Never thought of that aspect before, I better prepare my husband (I usually don't swear, but I caught myself really screaming and swearing completely out of my mind "I gonna kill you, bitch!" the other day whilst stamping a massive spider, so I wondered - ouups, what was that?)

Take care,


Deemented Sat 17-Oct-09 20:34:29

I only swore once on labour with DD - and that was when the anethatist asked me did i snore when i'm asleep - i answered with, 'How the fuck should i know, i'm asleep?'

pippylongstockings Sat 17-Oct-09 20:57:54

I have just asked DP as I really couldn't tell you what I said..... and the answer is Yes, you swore alot!!!!!!

BlueyDragon Sat 17-Oct-09 21:10:30

I have (used to have, have now cleaned up my act!) a terrible potty mouth. Didn't swear once when in labour until they'd had me in stirrups for over an hour awaiting the registrar with the ventouse. At that point I thought it was quite reasonable to say "Get me the f*cking registrar".

So you may surprise yourself.

I had some bizarre scientologist midwife who kept telling me I wasn't allowed to scream and shout because it meant I wasn't pushing properly. I'm surprised I didn't swear at her.

WeeMo85 Wed 21-Oct-09 21:52:30


I am absolutly p*ssing myself!!!

Espc u Alina77!!

U lot have really cheered me up!!!

StripeyKnickersSpottySocks Wed 21-Oct-09 21:55:58

I don't bat an eyelid at all at general swearing. It does get you down though if its directed at you personally. Its not nice to have someone scream at you "you fucking bitch, you fucking cunt" for hours on end when you're only trying to help them.

FlamingoBingo Wed 21-Oct-09 21:56:47

You konw you don't have to star out swear words on MN, don't you WeeMo?

When I had DD4, after my lovely, lovely midwife who I knew very well had told me for the umpteenth time to please breath in so the gas and air would work and so I didn't pass out, I told her to fuck off on a lovely helpful outbreath - she burst out laughing and said 'baby's close then!' grin

BarakObamasTransitVan Thu 22-Oct-09 10:03:29

StripeyKnickers I almost kicked my poor mw in the head when she was giving me an internal. The exam did hurt and it was pretty much a reflex action but omg I was mortified. Christ, if I'd made contact I'd have knocked her out I think. Midwifery is dangerous, people! She was such a lovely woman, too. I don't think she took it personally - she waited around long after her shift had finished to check on me and ds (ended up having an emcs) so I don't think she hated me blush

LEMONADEGIRL Thu 22-Oct-09 12:15:49

I swore like a sailor during labour with my DS. I was 8cm on arrival at the hospital and until that point I was okay but from then on I F'd all over the place but not at the midwife or any of the staff. I was mortified afterwards when my DH told me what I had said but to be honest I was too focused on trying to get DS out.

The midwife didn't seem too bothered to be honest and like others have said I think they have heard it all before and especially with a first it is all a bit of a shock. At least that is what I am hoping as am currently 20 weeks.

pregnantpeppa Thu 22-Oct-09 12:22:43

I have terrible language in the office and at home in front of DH. I was the model of politeness to all the midwives in labour (while quietly hissing at DH when they were out the room). The one thing I said when the MW asked me whether the gas & air was working (it wasn't touching the sides) was "fuck knows" and she sniggered as I'd been so polite to her up to then. Honestly, I love swearing me, just didn't fancy it in labour but if I had would have gone for it! If its any consolation I could hear many women screaming obsencities in the labour ward so I don't think you'll be the first.

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