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how to tell my first child he's going to be a big brother

(7 Posts)
hampdenpark27 Fri 09-Oct-09 08:09:30

My first child is 5 and a half, he's a lovely lad and has had the devoted attention of his mummy all to him self. I am now 9 weeks pregnant, i am going to wait until my 12 week scan before i approach the subject, but can anyone out there please give me some advice on how to break the news. thanks

Ponderful Fri 09-Oct-09 08:34:52

I think as long as you make it exciting and positive for him he should get excited too.Try not to focus on the negatives of sharing your time but how much fun it will be for him to play with the baby and help take care of it. Keep him involved eg thinking of names and what to buy.Books about becoming a big brother are good too. Have you any friends or relatives with babies that you can visit first to see how he interacts. He might love babies !

elliepac Fri 09-Oct-09 08:51:33

DS was a similar age (4.5) when DD arrived and i fretted and fretted about how to tellhim an how he would cope having been so used to having all the attention.

We made sure that having a sibling sounded exciting and made sure he was involved in all decisions such as names, clothes etc. He even helped to paint the nursery. By the end of the pregnancy he couldn't wait to meet his baby sister.

When she arrived, he was almost made more of a fuss of for becoming a big bother by relatives/friends than DD was for being born. He spent lots of time with DH and we made sure that every day he had some 'mummy time' when DD was napping or with DH. He adjusted fairy quickly and adores his little sister although even now when DD is 20m we still have to make sure he get his mummy time.

SmallSCREAMCap Fri 09-Oct-09 09:11:16

Similar age gap for my two.

DH and I told DD over dinner one evening, and then we celebrated with cake.

She was the first to know. We then asked her if she would like to tell the grandparents, aunties & uncles. That way she felt it was her news, and she received the big "Oh wow!" and the cuddle (with one notable exception who literally elbowed her aside and clung to me in floods of tears and I had to unpeel myself and try to bring a slightly offended DD in for a group hug - ah well, best laid plans and all that!)

DS is 6 weeks now and so far no hint of DD's nose being out of joint, apart from one minor strop about no-one looking at a picture she'd drawn - fair enough I'd say.

I am finding it to be a fabulous age gap, their needs are so different that neither seems to feel that the other is imposing.

Congratulations and good luck!

SmallSCREAMCap Fri 09-Oct-09 09:13:26

actually for the sake of accuracy, I did have a couple of girlfriends who held my hand up to the 12 week scan & had confidentially informed my line manager, so DD not strictly the first to know!

elliepac Fri 09-Oct-09 09:44:11

Agreed smallscreamcap, the age difference is perfect. Having a newborn is hard but DS was old enough to do most daiy stuff (washing, dressing etc.) by himself which made life a lot easier. DS very rarely feels that DD is getting more attention because he is old enough to understand that mummy has to look after DD but that it will be his turn shortly

hampdenpark27 Fri 09-Oct-09 16:09:29

Thanks, thats really put my mind at ease.

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