What did you do differently to help you get pregnant?

[iggypiggy]

I would like you to humour a grumpy cow please

Am wondering what people did differently when they decided to start trying to get pregnant - and if they think it made a difference!

eg. Taking folic acid, giving up alchol, taking other supplements, giving up caffeine - or did you just carry on as normal?

I am bored of ttc and failing (is now 6 months since my MC) - so am looking for tips from people who have actually managed it.

thank you v. mcuh in advance

[jaype]

Pre-seed - first 2 came along straight away in first month of trying, third took 15 months... I had some tests and established there was nothing amiss with me and the Clearblue Digital thing was useless so decided to try something to give dp's wrigglers a boost. I was pg again within a month! Not bad for a tenner but wish I hadn't blown £100 plus god knows what on sticks for the monitor.

[humanfraggle]

After months of trying we just relaxed and stopped thinking about it... and that's when it happened.

Being on holiday at the time probably helped with the relaxing

Apart from that we did nothing different, didn't give up any foods or start taking supplements... I truly believe it will happen when the time is right, it is so easy to get worked up about it and stress every month...

Try to think of it not as 'trying to get pregnant' but 'not trying not to'

Hope this helps and good luck

x

[iggypiggy]

I did try that in August humanfraggle but the obession is creeping up on me again... It's been over a year of trying with one MC and the edd looming... hard not to stress

[piggybank]

Hi Iggy,

3 months before ttc I quit smoking and started taking a vitamin that included folic acid. I also ensured that my alcohol intake was no more than the government's recommended units for women each week (prior to that I regularly over indulged).

The month I conceived I had been tracking my fertility by monitoring my basal temperature and cervical mucus ? see www.fertilityuk.org/nfps25.html#indicatorsoffertilityslug. I did not chart long enough to make any pattern out of my temperature but decided I was ovulating based on my mucus (I was correct and succeeded in getting pregnant!).

If you have been ttc for a while, perhaps you are already taking this approach of charting your physiological signs?

I?m convinced that the two biggest factors were quitting smoking (smoking reduced fertility) and learning how to listen to my body by (cervical mucus etc).

Ironically I did start smoking - just for a week - on holiday when I was a week pregnant but didn?t know it! I was convinced the cramps I had was my period coming. I haven't had one since.

Good luck and I really hope this helps.

PB

[MrsBadger]

dd: took folic acid, had more sex

dc2: had more sex, gave up bfing

[humanfraggle]

iggy I completely understand where you're coming from... I first fell pg a couple of years ago - we had been really trying for about 8 months and it was our first 'go' at trying, and every month we were absolutely gutted that it hadn't worked. Then I changed jobs so we stopped 'trying' so hard... and the following month I was pg! Sadly that ended in MC after 10 weeks, but again I believe that was all for a reason.

Our circumstances are much better now, we're both in better, more secure jobs, and have our own place rather than renting, I think this time around we were just more relaxed and had the attitude 'if it happens, it happens', and we feel very lucky that it has happened.

I really feel for you, I totally understand how heartbreaking it is every month to find out it hasn't happened. And it's a lot easier to say 'relax and don't stress about it' than to actually do it!

Btw - I would recommend giving up, or at least greatly reduing, alcohol intake even while TTC, just in case you catch on, you could be 6 weeks pg and drinking otherwise... just my humble opinion though...

Good luck to you... big hugs x

[iggypiggy]

piggy think the alcohol consupmtion might be the key for me... I drank very little in Jan and got PG in feb... but am drinking more at the mo... think that is my next plan!

I gave up smoking (which was only really social smoking) well over a year ago...

Am not temping... it fuels my obsession!

MrsBadger am having more sex is good advice tho!

[iggypiggy]

fraggle thanks xx I think you right about drinking tho... oddly - i would like to change jobs, part of the problem is the amount of time I have on my own to stress about stuff (am in office alone, but am used to open plan)

[barbie1]

Hey iggs

Reflexology...i know i keep banging on about it but im sure that is what helped me.....

[ClaireDeLoon]

Completely gave up alcohol that month. Almost.

And started with a herbal supplement prescribed by a medical herbalist that was aimed at trying to solve mid-cycle beleding I had been having. But had only taken that for a week before I got the bfp so I don;t think it was that.

Otherwise absolutely nothing at all compared to the previous 25 cycles of failure.

[iggypiggy]

barbie hello can you tell I am going nuts again... oops! ok, will maybe try reflexology - but don't like people touching my feet...

[iggypiggy]

Claire 25 cycles is a long time to wait - but am getting an alcohol theme here.. am wondering if that is the way to go... DH also gave up drinking in Jan... wonder if that helped with the feb BFP. Congrats, by the way!

[piggybank]

LOL at MrsBadger's advice to have more sex

Yes, if tracking feeds the obsession then definitely don't do it because more stress is the last thing you need.

Re spousal alcohol consumption, my friend got pregnant after a long time of trying when her husband (who typically drank a lot) gave up drinking. She didn't drink much herself but she also gave up while ttc.

Sounds like it's worth a go but making big lifestyle changes like that can also be stressful and we all know that a little alcohol helps when following MrsBadger's advice !

[MrsBadger]

oh dear...
it wasn't advice - you asked what I did differently, and that was what I did!

[ILikeToQuickstepItTangoIt]

Do you really know and understand your cycle and its different phases?

You don't necessarily have to chart, but knowing what your ovulation signs are can make a big difference.

If you are unsure or would like to learn more about the mechanics of your cycle I can highly recommend a book called Taking Charge of Your Fertility. It explains the different phases of your cycle and how important each one is to conception.

Good luck

[MaHobbit]

Not sure if this helps but first time I got preg it took just over a year, then I had a mc. Got pregnant again within 3 months (DS now 18 months) and am now (hopefully - the mmc breeds permanent paranoia) 12 weeks pregnant again.

Each time I had decided that a baby was ONE of the things I wanted in life, and my other goals included getting fit and being better at running. So I was relaxed, trying to eat healthily and not drink very much at all, and exercising regularly. We were also doing the deed for fun, not for fertility each time I got preg. Funnily enough when I felt the improvement in my fitness I was soon pregnant. But could be coincidence.

Rambling way of sayaing general fitness seemed to help me, as did trying to enjoy my life as it was.

[herethereandeverywhere]

After 15 months of trying, first month of pre-seed plus following Deanna plan (google it) worked for us.

I had also improved my diet by seeing a nutritionist and knew when I ovulated using ov.predictors but it was the pre-seed and deanna combo for me!

Also a dear friend trying for over a year got the remainder of my (unopened!) pre-seed stash and fell pg 1st month of using it!

So my very unscientific sample says pre-seed has a 100% record

[bibbitybobbityCAT]

Had sex in the morning.

[EightiesChick]

The month we conceived, after 8 months trying, we only had sex twice, as we'd both been ill at the start of the month. However, both times were very late on in the cycle, later than I had been thinking would be at all useful (I had been temping and using TCOYF, mentioned above, plus ovulation predictor kits). So I concluded that I might actually have been ovulating later even than the signs or OPKs were telling me, and therefore in earlier months we'd "given up" too early. So don't give up hope after day 14 / when you think you have ovulated. Give it a few more goes at least.

The other thing was that DH had been on recommended supplements - zinc, magnesium and vitamin E - for a couple of months by that point. Of course it could have been coincidence, but they won't do any harm so I would get your DH/P on to those asap.

[iggypiggy]

mrsbadger I know it wasn't advice but it is actually good advice

hobbit good advice about not making it your priority, just one of your goals... I too have been doing the get fit thing!

here pre-seed sounds promising!

Iliketo um probably not - but I use fertility friend - have used opks and know what day of the month I got PG in feb - not sure how much use that is, but I seem to ovulate around CD 16 - guess there is more I can do...

eighties am currently trying not to time when we have sex - just do as much as poss all through the month - which is a few times a week usually.. supplements for DH, I haven't tried!

[alana39]

After 18 months of trying had appointment at fertility clinic lined up. Had given up smoking, cut down on drinking drastically, was resigned to nothing happening so went on holiday and drank, ate unpasteurised everything, even smoked a bit - came back and went to the fertility clinic, then realised 2 days later I was 7 weeks pg. Was probably more relaxed. Had both been taking all the recommended supplements for a while so this wasn't different. Sometimes it does just take time (sorry I hated being told that too!)

[ILikeToQuickstepItTangoIt]

Do you know about the leutal phase of your cycle? It has to be about 10 days long to support a pregnancy. That may be something worth looking into?

[Fajitas]

I conceived before I went on holiday, but I think that the trick to successful implantation was (a) no alcohol whatsoever; and (b) being away from the stress of work; whilst on holiday. I was taking supplmenents, tried reflexology and acupunture - none of that made any difference month after month after month. But the holiday did!

[iggypiggy]

alana I am impatient! But you right..

Iliketo LP is 13 days long - sometimes 14, but that may be that i ovulate sometimes on CD17... Have clearblue fertility monitor... am wondering whether to start on that again... hmmm

[blushes]

I know how irritating this is to hear/read... but we were trying for 9 months following my mc, and the month I got pregnant I

• decided to "take a break" from ttc, though didn't use contraception, just didn't focus on "trying".
• stopped counting cycle days and noting cm etc
• stopped taking folic acid
• stopped stressing about it!

Of course it's virtually impossible not to keep some sort of mental note of what CD you're on etc. But I did not write anything down or work out the best time to have sex.

So it really was that old cliche- "just relaxing". The only thing I did make sure we did was have very regular sex- as in every other night (but without paying attention to cycle days).

In fact I'm pretty sure our baby was conceived on a night when dp had been asleep and I was dog tired. Stoically I woke him up and got on with it, where usually we might have thought "sod it". So, have sex a lot, basically, would be my advice.

(Oh and I also kept away from the mumsnet ttc thread I was on...)