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How soon to start for 2nd baby?

(8 Posts)
Sminks Tue 22-Sep-09 16:33:36

Hi everyone

I'm in my late thirties and my husband is mid forties and we have a 14 week old baby.

Some of you will probably freak when I ask this but we really want to start trying for number 2 so that we can 'complete' our family. I wondered what your experiences were of having your 2nd child 'soon' after your first and whether you would recommend it?

Thanks! x

warthog Tue 22-Sep-09 16:37:19

i think you have to do it when YOU feel ready. no-one else can tell you.

having said that we started trying when dd1 was 18 mo. dd2 is now 13 mo and i'm thinking about no. 3.

i know someone with 4 under 5 and she's very happy with her spacings.

closer you have them, the more they play together later, the harder work it is in the beginning.

really up to you - you're the one that's got to deal with it!

stillstanding Tue 22-Sep-09 16:37:35

I would say - just go for it now. You are not getting any younger and have no idea how long it will take you. Second "worst" scenario is that you will have two DCs a year apart which would be tough but so much better than worst scenario which (for me anyway) would be not to be able to have another one.

We waited to start trying until the time when there would have been a 2 year gap between DC1 and DC2 and it took over a year before I fell pregnant. One really really rough year with so much pressure. I so wish we had just got cracking sooner which would have been so much more relaxing.

wilkos Tue 22-Sep-09 16:40:04

if you're thinking about it then just do it smile

good luck!

alana39 Tue 22-Sep-09 16:47:49

After taking quite a while to get pg first time, we decided just to see what happened after. Was bf and didn't even have a period for 7 months (but I know you can get pg before they come back) then after 9 months started to get familiar nausea, tiredness etc. Was much nicer not to feel the pressure of suddenly starting "to try" iyswim, and as warthog says a small gap is hard work at first, but you get used to it and it gets easier quite quickly really.

Flibbertyjibbet Tue 22-Sep-09 16:49:52

DS1 was 7m when I got pg with ds2, I was a bit older than you.
It was the 2nd month we tried. Had tried years with ds1, and loads of people told me that if you are weaning a baby off bf and your periods have come back, you are super fertile as your body is still 'primed for pregnancy' (my docs words!). It worked for us.

I only stopped bfing ds1 abouta week before I must have got 'caught', I stressed for ages about being pg again already when I went back to work off maternity leave (but they were really happy for me after all those years of finding me crying in the loos each month), and it was hard hard work with two lively boys so close together.

But so worth it.

Go for it, less gap = less time paying nursery, less time out of working (if you want to go back to work), for me only 1 school year to get 1 to nursery and one to school in the mornings. They share activities, friends, and are sooo close.

go for it!!!!

caykon Tue 22-Sep-09 16:54:44

I have 12 months and 2 weeks between my 2. It was a bit hard a first but I think going from 1 to 2 is going to be harder. Mine are now 2 1/2 and 3 1/2 my youngest has started preschool now and it is getting so much easier, and other mums are just starting again with a newborn.
I wouldn't change the age gap I have they are great together and entertain and play with each other, when we go places they are both able to enjoy the same things.
I think it all depends on you. If you feel happy to have them close together then go for it.

Knickers0nmahead Wed 23-Sep-09 22:27:08

I have 14months between mine. DD was 5months when I got pg with ds. It has been hard work but I wouldn't have it any other way.

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