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does any one feel completely fed up

(9 Posts)
jellybean86 Mon 31-Aug-09 15:28:13

does anyone else feel completely fed up during pregnancy? im 14+3 and feeling very low. tired, emotional with a lot of anxiety about money and DP pyscho brother who is out to make my life hell. cries

wish i cud just run away from everything at the mo! my mum isnt supportive of my pregnancy so ive left the family home, moved town where im living with DP and his family. my famiy dont bother with me now. I know nobody in DP town and feel so lonely :-(

will this phase pass soon?

holliejobber Mon 31-Aug-09 17:53:30

Just wait untill you feel your baby move inside you. That'll definately cheer you up.

designerbaby Mon 31-Aug-09 17:54:47

Yes, sweetie. Often... Even when everything is all nice and stable it's common to feel vulnerable and emotional – and you've had a lot to deal with on top of the pregnancy by the sounds of things.

I think things do tend to get better in teh second trimester, but to be honest, you're going to need tour DPs support throughout - even more so now you're away from your other support networks. Have you told him how you're feeling? And shared your concerns about his brother?

Worth admitting the fact that you KNOW that you're a bit emotional at the moment BUT... at the beginning, IME!

Can I just recommend NCT antenatal classes to you? The actual 'learning' is a bit lentil-weavery at times, but you stand a good chance of making some really good mummy friends and they'll be invaluable after your little one arrives. Costs a bit, but you could start saving at bit at a time now? (and I have a feeling they do grant type things if times are tight at the moment - but I stand to be corrected on that!) I know those girls practically WERE my family in the early months!

And on the upside, your profile says you're in Bath? I studied there for 4 years, and love the place to bits and am quite jealous that you're living there (even the your circumstances may not be ideal..). Can I also remind you of the psychological benefits of getting out and about as much as possible? You'd be amazed what just getting out of the house can do for your head. And Bath's a pretty stunning place to do it!

I'm sure you will start feeling better soon - you've had a lot ot deal with by the sounds of it and it'll take some time to get back on an even keel.

((((hugs)))) in the meantime - and give my fondest to Bath!

db
xx

jellybean86 Mon 31-Aug-09 20:41:47

thankyou that means alot, your far more suportive that the other half.

he just kicked me out as i was scared that his brother come to visit his mum n dad. i think i have every right when his brother attacks my other half, jumps all over and damages my car, threatens to get me and spends pointless time doing funny phone calls.

thanks god i have the keys to my bosses house otherwise id have no where to go :-(

PavlovtheForgetfulCat Mon 31-Aug-09 20:48:22

I am sorry you feel so fed up, but yes it is normal, common, whether you have other things going on in your life or not. When you have other stresses, it can make it a million times worse.

I am 28wks and feel fed up, and have done for most of this pregnancy. I have lots of stuff going on, but wonder if I would probably feel like this anyway.

It will pass. It might not be for a while, it might even last for the pregnancy in one form or another, but when you hold your baby, it will be amazing and worth it. And as you grow and start to feel the baby move, when you have your 21wk scan, when you watch your belly move when you have a bath, it will start to feel real and all the shit that goes with pg (hormones, sickness, bad skin etc) all go out of the window.

Do you have anyone around you to support you? Can you talk to your midwife about support groups in your area? Have you got any finances/dp finances to pay for NCT ante-natal classes? They are very supportive, get to meet mums to be, meet up regularly through pg and afterwards.

How is your DP with it? Is he pleased? Supportive? Happy to be becoming a father? understanding of how you feel?

jellybean86 Mon 31-Aug-09 21:01:44

When we found out i was pregnant he was adament that he wanted to abort it. But after i was admitted into hospital after being told it was likely i would misscarry then seeing the heartbeat he has been great, and has bought lots of stuff for the baba already. And he was very proud to show EVERYONE the scan photos.

Dont really have anyone to support me, only him and his family but that has gone out the window now.

I cant really afford NCT classes, i only work 2days a week as i was made redundant so im saving as much as i can for my little baba.

designerbaby Tue 01-Sep-09 22:44:47

Jellybean - are things better today? Hope so. You need to get your DP to get his priorities straight. Your carrying his child, thereore he owes you some loyalty and TLC and needs to make sure you're looked after first and foremost.

What about friends? Anyone you could call just to talk things through?

Feel for you sweetheart - doesn't sound like an ideal situation.

Look after yourself and your bump. And do some digging about those NCT grants... you might be able to go for nowt. I think the extra support would come in handy even if things are better by then.

Thinking of you - let us know how you are?

db
xx

Longtalljosie Wed 02-Sep-09 07:53:41

If you're on benefits / have a low income you may be able to qualify for the reduced membership rate, which is just £2. Give them a call and talk it through - their enquiries line is 0300 3300770. You may not be able to do the ante-natal course (or you may, I don't know, they do do outreach work for young parents) - but there are bumps and babies groups where you can meet people. HTH smile

PavlovtheForgetfulCat Wed 02-Sep-09 09:13:53

oh if you are able to get some financial support to do the NCT groups, you must do them, they will provide you will so much support, honestly, if you are feeling isolated, they can be a lifeline as a new mum.

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