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Worried about bonding

(4 Posts)
startingagainafter14years Sun 09-Aug-09 09:13:19

I am 32 weeks pregnant and this is my second child after having a 14 year gap!

I really wanted this baby to be another girl as I know what to do with them and I love my girl sooooo much! But it's a boy. I'm worried that I won't be able to bond with my son once he's born... Is this just hormones or what? Why don't I feel that same yearning to grab a baby boy that I do when I'm near a baby girl!?
Will I be able to love this baby as much as I love my girl?

Can any one help?

mogend77 Sun 09-Aug-09 10:27:31

Hugs. FWIW I think it's quite common to yearn for the same again - you love the one you have so much that you associate loving a baby in your mind with that baby you have - so the ideal baby in your head is almost a mini-me of the first.

I know quite a few people who have felt this way, but they all bonded with their second baby anyway, though in one case it took longer. Not bonding is quite rare in reality, and evolution/hormones are all on your side.

I can understand your feelings of panic now - but I'd be willing to bet they'll dissolve into adoration when he lands on your chest.

Mouette Sun 09-Aug-09 18:02:03

I know women who really wanted a boy, but had a girl - they fell in love with their girls the minute they saw them and can't stop going on about how wonderful it is to have a daughter! I'm sure it will be the same for you with your son! I think it's great you're going to have one of each so to speak!

startingagainafter14years Tue 11-Aug-09 18:48:36

Thanks for the support!
Will let you know how it goes!

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