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Someone please tell me it will get better - I'm at the end of my tether!

(11 Posts)
sushistar Sun 07-Jun-09 18:57:36

This is my 2nd pregnancy - I have a 18 month old ds - and this time round it's HELL. I'm only about 9 weeks, but I'm an emotional wreck, exhausted to the point of tears most days, nauseous all the time, dizzy, and feel so weak I have to sit down when I get to the top of the stairs! This is a million miles away from how it was with ds - then I had about 2 weeks of mild nausea, and felt a bit tired. This time I feel like i can barely function, let alone care for a toddler full time before going to work every evening. DH is being wonderful, doing all the housework and cooking, but I'm starting to worry about him because he looks so shattered having to look after ds so much as well as do all the cooking and everythin g else.

I wanted this baby, but now I'm wondering how on earth I'm going to cope. I'm in tears just writing this. Please someone tell me it will be ok?

corblimeymadam Sun 07-Jun-09 19:03:59

Message withdrawn

babyinbelly Sun 07-Jun-09 19:08:02

i felt them same. used to put cbeebies on for ds and fall asleep on the sofa. it is hard work put as your pregnacy progresses and you are less tired it will get better

weegiemum Sun 07-Jun-09 19:09:27

I think this is typical early pregnancy with a toddler (d1 was exactly 2 when ds was born, then ds was 22 months when dd2 was born).

I was totally exhausted and ill - morning sickness (I threw up whenever I got to the top of the stairs!) and then I had persistent UTIs and kidney trouble .... it was total crap. I didn't much enjoy pg with dd1, and I hated the other 2!

It is, actually, easier once you have the baby. You are tired but at least your symptoms have gone .....

Take care, rest when you can, ask for help. In my 3rd pg we got a cleaner for 4 hours a week - it made an immense difference!

nowwearefour Sun 07-Jun-09 19:10:24

it really will be ok. the hormones will calm down before the pregnancy is over- even in just a few weeks. and you will have a wonderful new baby and a sibling for your ds. congratulations. it is hard in those first few weeks but it will get better i promise!

sushistar Sun 07-Jun-09 19:15:13

I really hope you're all right! I know everyuone says every pregnancy is different, but seriously I feel SO rotten compared to last time I'm even wondering if I'm ill - I lost a lot of blood after my last labour so I was vey aneamic for months, and I'm wondering if I'm low in iron again. But I'm probably just trying to look for a reason I feel so awful - like you all say, this is normal. Doesn't make it easier though! I'm so weepy this time as well, which I wasn't with ds. It's grim.

WinkyWinkola Sun 07-Jun-09 19:21:19

It will get better. It will. I promise. I too went through this hell. I'm 19 weeks now and felt a lot better at 15 weeks. I know it seems a long way off but it will get better. And you'll have such a reaffirmation of life after feeling so wretched for so long.

It's truly dreadful I know and you have my total sympathies.

You will cope when the baby arrives. You'll feel a lot better by then, that's for sure!

sushistar Sun 07-Jun-09 19:38:40

weegiemum, liked your idea of a cleaner - I might look into that. I'm always a bit worried that I'd have to clean up BEFORE they came round iyswim, there are kids toys and plies of clean laundry everywhere...
Do they clean while you and the kids are there?

BiscuitStuffer Mon 08-Jun-09 11:00:44

You poor love - I was like this with my 2nd pregnancy too. I was beside myself from 6 weeks and thought that I might die. I could barely breathe I was so tired. Do you know what - I was very skeptical but what worked, literally overnight, was to go and see a homeopath and to take the remedies that they suggested for me. It really was amazing.

BiscuitStuffer Mon 08-Jun-09 11:01:15

Definitely get a cleaner!

Hawkmoth Mon 08-Jun-09 12:58:42

This is my second pregnancy, and it's so much harder than the first, even though I was a single parent and this time I have a lovely DP who has done EVERYTHING round the house for me because I've been so feeble.

I've found the emotional side to be the worst bit. Totally out of control some days - crying, temper (punched a wall so hard that three months later I still have a haematoma), paranoia, wildly exaggerated stress reactions.

I've just about calmed down at 30 weeks. The tiredness has passed, as has the rage... which is good! I'm just left with a vague sense of disbelief and unease!!!! Knitting tiny clothes seems to help me focus... and I'm not as mad as I sound, I have been able to be painfully self-aware throughout!

Good luck

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