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newly pregnant after 2 mcs and convinced its going to go wrong again

(14 Posts)
hereshoping Sun 01-May-05 12:15:09

Just got a BFP and feel awful,tense,tearful, worried that ahvent got enough symptoms and its all going to go wrong again - 2 missed mcs in aug 04 and jan05
amwaiting for referral to epu but certain will get bad news again
anyone out there understand?

Nemo1977 Sun 01-May-05 12:21:33

congrates hun I totally understand. Before i had ds i had 2 natural mcs. Now I have a gorgeous 18mth old. I also had my missed mc in dec and am pg again and now due for when i was told my last baby had died... Hun I can completely empathise with the anxiety you are feeling but we have to have faith in our little beans to fight on for us. You will be anxious and scared etc but think at least half the battle is done by getting pg now we have to trust our bodies [hard i know after prior let downs] to help nourish our babies

hunkermunker Sun 01-May-05 12:21:57

Congratulations on your pregnancy

I don't understand properly, because I haven't been through it, but I will be thinking of you and hoping that you get good news at the EPU xxxxxx

prettyfly1 Sun 01-May-05 16:22:20

had three mcs too - was told would never have baby. Due this week. The worst thing you can due is stress yourself out about it. I know its hard but try to believe that what will be will be. Take the best care of you and your little bump as best as you can and let nature take its course. Whatever happens we are thinking about you. Best of luck mate.x

Sophmum Sun 01-May-05 17:04:28

Congratulations on being pregnant.

I know it is so nerve wracking to be in your shoes - I had a missed m/c in Nov 04 and am now 8 weeks, and desparately worried. But - I have had an early scan at 6.5 weeks which showed a heartbeat (my m/c happened at 6.5 weeks but I found out at 10 weeks at a dating scan).

You are bound to worry constantly but I am trying to look on this pregnancy as something entirely new and separate from what has happened before, even to the point of telling myself, out loud, that this time it is going to be fine. I think a positive outlook helps a lot, just to make it easier from day to day.

Good luck and good vibes.

starshaker Sun 01-May-05 17:12:12

congrats on being pregnant
i had 2 mcs and was told i couldnt have a baby i have a gorgoeus baby girl who is only a week old and is perfect. i went through the same as you did even up till i had her i thought something was gonna go wrong but wee alana is fighting fit and amazing so im sure it will be fine just try and stay positive
good luck hun x

Bonkerz Sun 01-May-05 17:31:11

Hi babe, im in the same position as you. MC in July 04 and jan 05 and got bfp on tuesday. Had docs on friday and got referred to EPU with a big fight!! Got a prescription for aspirin and doc took blood from me then and there. Have scan on wednesday and although i feel fine i still keep expecting to go to the toilet and find blood.

No matter how much i try to relax i cant, im convinced im gonna lose this baby and it terrifies me that i cant do anything to stop it. Im resting lots and have cut out all caffeine and am eating well, taking my vits and folic acid and aspirin BUT am still scared stiff.

Bonkerz Sun 01-May-05 17:55:00

just to add. i have hardly any symptoms, my bbobs are abit sore and im tired but apart from that nothing! Im trying to view this as a positive as with both my mc i was very sick from 5 weeks.
My email is slittlejohns25 at hotmail dot com and if you want we can email each other. it may help us get thourgh this really hard time.

Cadmum Sun 01-May-05 17:58:09

Hereshoping: I am glad I found this. I am so sorry that you are feeling this worried. I don't think that you can honestly expect to feel much better until you have delivered... An early scan would certainly help.
I worried through the first 20 weeks of my pregnancy with DS2 and then I just relied on feeling him move to get me through the last 17 weeks. The best thing that I did was to be really clear with the midwife about how I was feeling and we took full advantage of scans that were offered.
The train came off the rails in the two pregnancies that followed DS but I think that I was too confident (from my successful pg with him) to really take it easy and get the ealy scans etc.
I will be off-line for the next 90 days as DH is on his way to New York with the lap-top but I will keep you in my prayers and ask him to keep a look out for your news.
Try to relax and take it one day at a time. Enjoy every second of your pregnancy so that if the worst does happen then you will know in your heart that you gave your 'bean' as happy a place as possible for the time you had. Am I even making sense here?

Take care of yourself, your DH and all of your little people.

yellowbear Sun 01-May-05 19:40:47

Hi hereshopping, i had 2 missed mcs in june 04 & nov 04 and got a bfp just over a week ago. I understand exactly how you feel as I don't have many symptoms either, possibly sore boobs but thats probably jsut me keeping checking. The symptoms I had the last three times (ds of 2.7)were overwhelming tiredness & a very weak bladder - I don't seem to have these this time so like you am worried. I promised myself I wouldn't get stressed this time but it is easier said then done! I have a scan on thurs but as I don't think I will be quite 6 weeks then I'm not sure anything will show up! Even more worry. I suppose I should be grateful that I have a scan though!

Hope you are feeling a little better & get a date for your scan soon.

hereshoping Sun 01-May-05 19:52:30

thanks girls -so many old friends from ttc thread and mc thread
couldnt post there - didnt feel right
bonkerz - thanks for email address, I use dhs so wont for now as I dont want him reading just how obsessed i am
lets keep in touch thru mumsnet
just hard to have faith isnt it when youve been let down by your body before
I cant remember what symptoms I had in my normal pgsbut dont feel they are strong enough

berolina Sun 01-May-05 20:14:56

Hereshoping: congratulations!
The magic of the BFP is rather taken away after m/c isn't it? When I got pg 3 cycles after an m/c I felt the same, almost regretting having ttc again. My pregnancy has gone fine (due in 1 month) but has been hard emotionally. Wishing you all the very best

Mirage Sun 01-May-05 20:30:31

hereshoping,I know how you feel.I was told that I'd never have children,then concieved a miracle baby only to loose it through ectopic pregnancy.When I was pregnant with dd shortly afterwards I was a nervous wreckfor months,particularly as I had no real symptoms at all.I was convinced that it was too good to be true.Happily she was born healthy & is the light of our lives.

I am 35 wks with our 3rd baby now & went through all the worry again in the 1st few months & should have had a season ticket to the EPAU.I think that when you loose a baby,you kind of loose your innocence & never take anything for granted.What I forced myself to remember was that this baby is totally different from the baby we lost & indeed,dd,so the pregnancy is bound to be different too.

Best of luck for your scan

bayleaf Fri 06-May-05 20:23:52

Just wanted to empathise - I'm now 22 weeks with my second child - but I've had 3 miscarriages in the past and this pregnancy took 8 attempts at ivf - and I'm 41 - so I spent the first 12 weeks feeling physically ill with the stress of not quite believing it could last.
I'm much calmer now - but one of the thigns that hs MADE me calm down is that I'd bought an ultrasound doppler ( like midwives have) and used it from 10 weeks - the baby's heartbeat was ALWAYS high 180s - i.e. VERY high, almost dangerously so. 24 hours after the nuchal scan ( which was good) at 12 weeks it had fallen by 20 beats per minute - and within another week it had fallen by a further 10 beats. This somewhat dramatic change made me realise what my stress levels were doing to the baby and I have been determind NOT to let myself get worried about things since. Easier said than done, I know - but try!!!

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