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can't believe it - MIL seriously insisting that we call ds-to-be Gerard

(131 Posts)
laughorcry Tue 19-Apr-05 18:30:56

Not sure whether to laugh or cry. MIL getting really aggresive about the fact that dh and I do not want to call our baby Gerard - it was her dad's name and she is saying that dh will be the first son in six generations not to name after his grandfather.

Hope am not offending anyone btw, but can't say I like the name much and anyway feel that this is our choice to make.

I can't believe how upset this is making me - any suggestions for how to deal with her?

PuffTheMagicDragon Tue 19-Apr-05 18:32:35

Crikey. Could you cope with it as a middle name?

MarsLady Tue 19-Apr-05 18:33:32

could you try telling her that you are Everton fans?

bundle Tue 19-Apr-05 18:33:35

it's tough, it's not her baby. sorry to be so blunt

compo Tue 19-Apr-05 18:33:51

we had to have dumb family tradition name as ds' middle name. grrr

nerdgirl Tue 19-Apr-05 18:33:57

Any chance the baby will be a girl?

bundle Tue 19-Apr-05 18:34:33

compo, you didn't, you can say No.

noddyholder Tue 19-Apr-05 18:35:03

I don't know why but this has really made me laugh sorry and thanks at the same time

ZoeC Tue 19-Apr-05 18:36:03

I'd have thought that, since it's his mother, it's his problem to sort out and discuss with her. Would you get any back-up from your FIL? You shouldn't have to be the 'bad daughter-in-law'. Besides, aren't pg women excused from family disputes .

Hope it gets sorted.

Dahlia Tue 19-Apr-05 18:36:53

I would have thought it was up to your dh to speak to her about it, surely he can be firm in a pleasant way but say absolutely not? Or if you can stand it, have it as a middle name - but its not her choice, its yours, and thats that.

laughorcry Tue 19-Apr-05 18:38:13

am trying to see funny side! dh suggested that we went with it for a middle name, but i've got a horrible feeling that if I give in to this she will think she can interfere in everything.

glad people don't think I'm over-reacting.

pretty sure will be a boy - although was amused when sonographer pointed out his bits and then said that of course she couldn't be certain!

Dahlia Tue 19-Apr-05 18:39:27

yeah but if it turns out to be a girl she might insist on geraldine...

bundle Tue 19-Apr-05 18:39:56

being pg is a chance to act deranged, so can use this as "excuse" if she hassles you later. what would you prefer, a bit of a hard stare from her or a child with a name you hate?

JoolsToo Tue 19-Apr-05 18:40:50

Gerard is a lovely name - I have a rather handsome cousin called Gerard - however if you hate it don't do it!

bran Tue 19-Apr-05 18:41:45

Tell her you think it's unlucky to pick a name before the birth, but that you will add it to the list of possibles. Then when he is born just say "Satsuma, say hello to your granny". She'll be all gooey because she's meeting her grandson for the first time and hopefully will think the name suits him.

Of course you don't have to call him Satsuma if you don't want to, I just like the name.

WideWebWitch Tue 19-Apr-05 18:44:30

Tell her it's NOT HER DECISION. What a mad old bat, she sounds like Bunny McDougal on Sex and the City, remember her?

WideWebWitch Tue 19-Apr-05 18:45:37

sorry, agree with everyone else, get DH to tell her it's not her decision.

laughorcry Tue 19-Apr-05 18:46:59

I'm afraid I really hate the name - would rather call him Satsuma to be honest.

would love dh to deal with this, and know he doesn't like the name either, but think he is going to opt for the easy life and say that it is not that important - even though it is that important for me (and the baby)

golds Tue 19-Apr-05 18:47:20

Satsuma - very catchy

Chandra Tue 19-Apr-05 18:47:31

No you are not overreacting, my MIL also wanted to interfere, and DH seemed not to be bothered by that so I told him, OK, I have been bearing this child for 9 months, I have felt sick for three months and sleepless for the last two. I Have put in hold my plans, and it will take me a long time to be back to my previous shape. It is only fair that I have a say on how this child is named!!!

It worked . But... having said that MIL still introduces DS to her friends with the neame we decided not to use

WideWebWitch Tue 19-Apr-05 18:47:40

Oh well, you'll have to tell her then.

LGJ Tue 19-Apr-05 18:49:55


She must be Irish...............



Oh Yackie do.................

LGJ Tue 19-Apr-05 18:50:54

Tell her to sling her hook and that is being polite

bundle Tue 19-Apr-05 18:50:58

sorry, but dh sounds like a bit of a weed

laughorcry Tue 19-Apr-05 18:54:24

'fraid he is a bit where his mum is concerned (thinks it isn't worth the hassle). She's not Irish, but family is way back.

OMG Chandra - hadn't even thought of the possibility that she would just go ahead and use it even if we didn't call him that.

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