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Dilemma as to whether to find out the baby's sex!

(19 Posts)
AnotherHelen Tue 05-Apr-05 15:10:21

I have my 20 week scan on the 13th may,
I found out with my first and again with my second,
but this time i dont want to! this will be our last
baby and we have a c-section planned, like my second
baby, we knew he would be born on 25th feb in the
morning and we found out his sex at the 20 week scan,
so although a new baby is nothing short of fantastic!
there was no surprise left in it for us! so this time
i want to leave the finding out for the big day! xxxay,

fastasleep Tue 05-Apr-05 15:11:46

Definately keep the mystery! I only want to know this time for 8 month gone shopping spree that seems to be inevitable!

Pinotmum Tue 05-Apr-05 15:12:32

I think your decision makes perfect sense. Why is it a dilemma? Whos is disagreeing?

NomDePlume Tue 05-Apr-05 15:13:35

I didn't find out with my DD, and DH and his 1st wife chose not to know with their 2 DSs either.

I just think you get so few surprises in life that unless there is a risk of a gender specific genetic syndrome that you would prefer to be aware of/test/plan for, it is nicer to be surprised . I'm sure I'l get shot down by someone for saying that but there you go !

Good luck with baby no3

starlover Tue 05-Apr-05 15:19:14

I didn't know with DS... but got SOOOOOOO sick of people asking me what I was expecting.
But I am glad I didn't find out, it is lovely to have a surprise at the end of it all

Miaou Tue 05-Apr-05 15:21:30

Agree agree agree, I don't want to know what sex this one is and didn't with my first two - it gives you something to focus on whilst in labour! My dh was taking bets with the midwives as to whether it would be a girl or a boy!

kama Tue 05-Apr-05 15:24:10

Message withdrawn

AnotherHelen Tue 05-Apr-05 16:24:59

Well my dillema (sorry having a no brain day today!) is my fella wants to know! or he thinks he does but then he changes his mind! im a pretty impatient person and its a temtation for me to find out, but i dont want to weaken and find out as i know i would regret it later! i have 2 boys and would love a girl! i think my fella would just like to know sooner rather than later wether we will have one or not! xxxx

Merlin Tue 05-Apr-05 16:44:44

You're lucky to have the choice - our local health authority wont tell you, and I wouldn't pay for a private scan - a friend of mine did and they were wrong!!! Had the room decorated, clothes bought everything!!!!

k9kuts Tue 05-Apr-05 16:57:51

hello not sure whether this will help but i definatly wanted to know so i asked & was told i was having a boy so we chose the name & bought lots of boy things!and guess what i had a gorgeous baby girl!

kid Tue 05-Apr-05 16:59:56

I decided to find out with both of mine. First time just because I was impatient. The 2nd time I wanted to know to see if we would need to move from a 2 bed to a 3 bed property.

I did want another girl but found out we were having a boy. I think it was good to have the 2nd half of the pregnancy to get used to it. I didn't mind having a boy and am glad I found out.

If I had anymore, I wouldn't find out as I already have one of each and the suprise would be nice! Thats a big if as we don't plan to have anymore!

Jockey Tue 05-Apr-05 17:31:23

I didn't find out with any of mine (3) and it was a lovely surprise each time. I was right about the first two, wrong about the third! If anyone asked what I was having I simply replied "a baby"!!! People are always surprised that you don't know the sex but personally I think it takes away the magic of it. Luckily, my health authority doesn't offer it anyway. Obviously some need to find out for practical reasons though & its a completely personal decision. I don't blame anyone for asking as it is SOOOOO tempting!

blueteddy Tue 05-Apr-05 18:08:33

If you have your heart set on having a girl, it may not be a bad idea to find out the sex at the scan.
That way, if it is another DS you will have time to get used to the idea before the birth IYKWIM.

SoupDragon Tue 05-Apr-05 18:11:45

If you're not sure, then don't ask. If you don't ask, you'll find out eventually anyway but nothing can give back the surprise of finding out on the day should you decide to ask at the scan and then decide you wish you hadn't found out.

police Tue 05-Apr-05 19:06:38

do it

aloha Tue 05-Apr-05 19:08:24

I am just like Kama - couldn't bear that the drs/scanners would know something about my baby that I didn't. Also I HATE surprises - all surprises!

Yellowbelly Tue 05-Apr-05 20:56:58

Am now terrified by the stories of doctors getting it wrong as we were told 10 weeks ago that we were having a girl and have chosen a name and bought clothes. (Did shy away from decorating the nursery for a girl though!) To add to the debate we didn't find out last time and I never thought I would want to this time, but we now have a 5 year old who came to the scan with us and was desperate to know. We thought that this would help her to prepare and she is thrilled to be having a sister, so we might be sending him back if they have made a mistake!!

beansprout Tue 05-Apr-05 21:00:44

Nooo! Don't! He'll find out soon enough!! If you don't want to know just yet, that's completely ok. There's nothing like the "it's a girl/boy" moment. For me, knowing would have been like opening my xmas presents in October (if that makes any sense!!)

spod Tue 05-Apr-05 21:07:23

dont do it! i didnt with dd and i wont next time either... thats the most exciting bit!

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