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Happy with midwifes?

(6 Posts)
prettyfly1 Wed 30-Mar-05 12:43:09

Hi guys,

bit of a rant i am afraid. Got to see midwife today, had a couple of complications through pregnancy so have seen them very regularly (am now 35 weeks). I am a single mum and this is my first child and i am SO PIXXED off with my antenatal care right now.

I HAVE Never seen the same midwife twice, they have cocked up all of my test results, and when i went last week they had neglected to mention a need for anti d injection - then acted like i should know about it. The girls i saw went on and on about how i dont have a birth partner and where was the father - despite the fact that this information is in my notes along with a message not to ask me again - and then panicked me totally by sending me to hospital immediately for more tests because they werent sure the baby was growing right. Thus taking me out of work and thoroughly scaring the hell out of me. When i got there though, the woman i saw treated me like a moron and was so patronising and rude like i should know that obviously it was nothing to worry about that my baby hasnt apparently grown for over four weeks and why was i worried? then she bloody asked about a birth partner - aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg. Not looking forward to this afternoon at all and i am just so cross. I know i am young (23) but not stupid and just wish there would be some consistency in my care - does anyone else feel like this??????

Holly290505 Wed 30-Mar-05 14:40:15

First of all - ((hugs))

SO Sorry you are having such a rotten experience. I am 24 and don't consider that to be young or stupid! This is our first baby and I am now 31 weeks.

We have had a pretty rubbish time with regard to midwife care as well - long story but I have a medical history as long as your arm which seems to have them running around like idiots and making dumb decisions rather than listening to ME and what I want - after all I'm the only expert on what I feel!

One midwife even thought it appropriate to ring us at 10.30pm one night to tell us about a positive blood test results. The only thing I can say other than empathasising with you is to carry on standing up for what you want and make sure if you get bad or inconsistent treatment ask to speak to the midwife sister in the antenatal clinic and complain to her. It worked for us and we now have a really good hospital midwife who we see with an obstetrician each time.

Having said that its a total pain in the bum to have to keep fighting your corner - especially when your pregnant. Actually that is my biggest fear about having to have a hospital delivery - having to fight for what I want all the time. Unfortunately it seems thats what you have to do.

This must be harder without a partner too and if I was you I'd stick a large piece of paper inside the cover of your notes so anyone you see has no excuse to keep on at you about it. Good luck and CAT me if you want to chat

Holly290505 Thu 31-Mar-05 16:45:25

Just to add to the ridiculous saga of my antenatal care I got a letter this morning telling me the 28 week Rhesus antibody bloods I had taken a month ago (i'm -ve, dp is +ve) need repeating. After much panic and ages trying to get through to someone it turns out the reason they need repeating is not that there is a problem, its that my date of birth wasn't written on the sample by the technician. Is there ANYONE out there that CAN do their job competently??? (Sorry don't mean to offend anyone - I know there is but it feels like this sometimes..argghh)

Chandra Thu 31-Mar-05 17:03:16

I can only recommend that you keep track of results and other maternity notes yourself and be ready to summarise what your problems have been and worries for every nurse, consultant or midwife you see. I had a 27 hrs long labour and I noticed that the midwife that dealt with me in the pre-birth ward didn't know about my previous problems, the second midwife didn't know I had already been in labour for 20hrs, and the doctor who helped DS out as a matter of emergency was never informed of the imminent problems as, surely, NOBODY wrote it down on my notes. The community midwife was not made aware of the problems I had at hospital and at this point I think that the fact that DS is still with us now it's just a matter of good luck...

prettyfly1 Sun 03-Apr-05 20:13:52

Hi guys me again,

cheers for the support. Went into prem labour on thursday night which had to be stopped, then it started again, all the midwives had different stories and ideas on what was happening, in desperation and knowing that everything had stopped i signed myself out this afternoon so i could get some peace. still not sure whats happening and although some of my care was great some of it was just appaling. so furstrated and terrified about the birth now. help

triceratops Mon 04-Apr-05 13:54:51

Sorry to hear that you are having such a bad time Prettyfly1. I had a great experience with my midwife last time. Saw the same woman all the way through and then she spent about two days with me while I was trying to do a home birth, came in with me and helped me deliver in hospital and looked after us for the two weeks afterwards. You do sound very unlucky, I suggest that if there is a next time you change your gp and try midwife only care as you may get a more helpful response.

You do sound brave tackling birth alone. It must add to your worries not even knowing your midwife very well. I hope your birth goes well and that you and the baby are fine.

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