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Diagnosed as high risk pregnancy and not coping very well - any tips for getting on with it?

(9 Posts)
hattyyellow Mon 13-Oct-08 10:46:21

Consultant confirmed last week that my placenta is covering the o/s and that he feels its unlikely to move and therefore equals placenta previa.

Scared me witless by explaining the need for emergency cover to take me to hospital if I start bleeding, risk of haemmorage, risk of prematurity, risks at birth etc. We have a skeleton emergency plan in place but nothing rock solid until my mum hopefully comes to stay with us when she gets back to the UK next month.

Am not coping very well with the whole thing. Snappy with my kids, irritable and detached from my partner, worried about the effects of my anxiety on the baby.

I have another 3 weeks until they will scan me again to check placental position. I work at home and DH is at work so don't even have the distraction of other adults around.

I can feel how panicked I'm getting and I am winding myself up by reading stuff on the internet which is spinning me into even more of a panic.

Please can anyone suggest ways of distracting myself, getting on with life, not spending days on end panicking? I'm very aware that there are much worse situations to be in, I just don't seem to be able to pull myself out of this cold fear.

Mandy73 Mon 13-Oct-08 11:01:54

Hi hattyyellow. So sorry to hear about this. What week are you?

Haven't had the most plain sailing PG myself and far from over all the hurdles yet. It's a horrible roller coaster, some days are far worse than others with panic, fear, misplaced guilt and awful nightmares. Then other days you're so exhausted by it all you almost go blank/in denial. Which isn't good either but somehow a bit easier.

>I can feel how panicked I'm getting and I am winding myself up by reading stuff on the internet which is spinning me into even more of a panic.

Exactly. Such a double edged sword. Still, it's good to be informed within reason, but yeah, I've googled myself into crying fits a lot. Keeping busy helps. Eating well (even if you have no appetite) helps. Stealing long showers/baths when you can helps. Watching fun crap telly is a good distraction. Sharing with DP helps. I also do some charity work and try to be grateful for what I have (sounds loopy but it does stop me from too much unhealthy wallowing).

I really hope everything will be OK for you. xx

Oblomov Mon 13-Oct-08 11:08:03

Calm. You have written this down. That will help. Keep calm. Perspective.
I am 35 weeks. Diabetic. High Risk. Not a problem.

The only reason that this is a problem to you, is that it has come as a big shock. I can see that and appreciate that. But please, it will be o.k.
You have to think through all the things that could happen. And then dismiss, aknowledge, get advice from Mn.
So, worse case ? Very difficult birth ? Cs ? It is do'able.

I hope this is helping.

Come back and let us help you and support you. And give you a bug hug. It will be O.K.

hattyyellow Mon 13-Oct-08 12:19:59

Cheers girls I really appreciate your support! So sorry to hear you are both going through similar, so much of what you write rings so true.

I'm 30 weeks today, so getting near the end but still not near enough so as to know the baby is big enough to be okay. The placenta was described to me as low-lying but 70% likely to move out of the way by the registrar at the 20 week scan - no one picked up on the position until last week when I spoke to a midwife to try and change the date for what I thought was a fairly routine scan - she explained just how important it was and how the position should have been explained.

So I'm pretty peed off as well with the hospital for not warning me earlier of the high-risk and for not telling me to avoid intercourse, strenous activity etc angry.

All good ideas especially crap tv, distraction and trying to process all the information and wait and see what happens. I know the best thing for me and the babe is to try and stay calm, it's so sad not being able to enjoy the rest of pregnancy.

Oblomov Mon 13-Oct-08 12:48:39

O.k. Hatty. Placenta can still move. I think (don't quote me) even up to 34 weeks.
But you need to get yourself over onto one of the other threads - placenta previa threads. man they are wealth of info, total support, specific to what is happening to you.

And anger is understandable. But you have to let this go.

And do you know, I have heard some funny things about placenta position. If only I hadn't done .....a/b/c/ - most are not true. Often just depends on your womb. Previous pg's and mc's. My Mw said, the placents often just attached to the healthiest place.
Food you ate, the fact you made love to your dh. Most of it is not proven to effect placenta positioning. Take heart.
Strenuous activity ? Have you been bungy jumping, young lady wink. Seriously . PROB... has not actually effected this.

AND I am going to be very harsh/firm with you here..... wink This is a problem/issue/ concern. But it is not major/life threatening. Or lets hope not. You MUST make sure that you get this into perspective. There are many more wks of your pg left. MANY more to ENJOY.

That is really important.

Hope that helps.

hattyyellow Mon 13-Oct-08 12:57:53

Cheers Oblomov you've made me laugh which is a big achievement the last few days! Because the placenta covers the o/s apparently it is very unlikely to move according to consultant - I am praying that it does but he's said not to plan for it to. Placenta threads scare me senseless - can't find a recent one, but will try and have a look!

I think the situation from his briefing can be life threatening if you start bleeding due to risk of haemmorage - again as you say, depends on what you read - I made the big mistake of reading the royal college obs and gynae report, first line talks about maternal death. Grrrrrreat.

Will try and stay calm and try to enjoy!

mrsgboring Mon 13-Oct-08 19:17:57

Would it help to look at it like this:

You have a genuine, bona fide risk factor, which means your consultant is looking at you. There is something there to monitor so they will.

Because this is beyond the range of normal pregnancy niggles/worries, it is out of your control. That is why you have a consultant to take care of you and guide your decision making. You don't have to take on all the responsibility for yourself.

My situation was different but I had a horrendous pregnancy filled with worry and found the best thing for helping it was to plan regular fun events (people coming round for meals, trips out etc.) just to distract from the pregnancy timeline.

hotbot Mon 13-Oct-08 19:52:16

hi one way or another this baby will come out, even if its via the subroof method, try not to worry you will extra special care.

hotbot Mon 13-Oct-08 19:52:49

sunroof method

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