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pregnant with new job - advice please!

(37 Posts)
BumblBeee Fri 29-Aug-08 10:37:16

Just got a new job but am pregnant. Having had 2 miscarriages this year I assumed this pregnancy wouldn't go ahead either but it seems to be continuing.

What to do? I am on a 3 month trial so I fear that they will get rid of me if I tell them about my situation...

Pinkjenny Fri 29-Aug-08 10:37:46

It would be more than their life's worth.

ScaryHairy Fri 29-Aug-08 10:38:24

How far along are you?
Although it makes sense to give your employer as much notice as possible in normal circumstances, in your shoes I would stay quiet until my probation period had passed.

hannah001 Fri 29-Aug-08 10:39:29

I wouldn't tell them if I were you - unless you're having terrible morning sickness.

bethoo Fri 29-Aug-08 10:39:41

dont tell them til you are at least past the 12 week point and explain why you did not mention anything earlier due to failed pregs in the past. they cannot fire you based on being pregnant but wait til after your trial period to say anything. you will not be entitled to their maternity pay though as you have to be employed for i think it is 15 weeks before falling pregnant or something like that. correct me if i am wrong.

BumblBeee Fri 29-Aug-08 10:46:14

I am not worried about their Maternity pay as most MP is only a bit better than the Gov's. I just want to be able to work until the baby is due and hopefully after.

I am about 10 weeks now

BumblBeee Fri 29-Aug-08 10:48:04

I will be about 23 weeks pregnant in 3 months time.

I expect I will be showing by then :-(

Flibbertyjibbet Fri 29-Aug-08 10:59:34

If you are already pregnant when you start the job then you won't be entitled to any maternity pay - you will have to apply for maternity allowance instead from the govt. I think it means you don't get the 6 x 90% of pay, just the £100 or so per week all the way through.

I think you are still entitled to the ordinary mat leave but not the option to take additional. But as oml is quite long now that might not matter?

You will be needing time off for antenatal appts by 23 weeks.

I think a lot depends on the employer and how they see you as the best person for the job etc. An employer I worked for a few years back got rid of someone within the 3 month trial period, they didn't actually have to specify a reason for the dismissal. In that case it was because she was crap at her job! But if they don't have to give a reason then it would be hard for you to prove that it was due to the pregnancy.

Flibbertyjibbet Fri 29-Aug-08 11:01:30

But hey winter is coming, keep a jacket on all the time. I went back to work after ds1, already pg with ds2, in the November. After the xmas break I walked in, took my jacket off and showed everyone my 20 week scan pic smile
But my boss and her boss knew that I was pg, and I had already been in the job 5 years so made a big difference.

BumblBeee Fri 29-Aug-08 11:25:04

Some good points, thanks very much.

BumblBeee Fri 29-Aug-08 11:43:54

I read this about SMP:

"If you get SMP, your employer will pay you 90 per cent of your average weekly earnings for the first six weeks, then up to £117.18 for the remaining 33 weeks. You pay tax and National Insurance in the same way as on your regular wages. Your employer reclaims the majority of SMP from their National Insurance contributions and other payments."

So they say it is only 1.5 x 90%

BumblBeee Fri 29-Aug-08 11:46:03

"you will not be entitled to their maternity pay though as you have to be employed for i think it is 15 weeks before falling pregnant"

bethoo this is right

WideWebWitch Fri 29-Aug-08 11:47:50

Don't tell them, you don't have to! And being pregnant shouldn't preclude you from making a living so don't worry, get past your three months (if you can) and then tell them.

I went for an interview at 17 weeks pregnant with dd and was getting away with it then.

BumblBeee Fri 29-Aug-08 12:12:54

VERY encouraging?

Any fashion tips?

"being pregnant shouldn't preclude you from making a living"

this is why i am working, i am not trying to be nasty or take the piss.

i can't spend 9 months with no income and i do think i would be good at their job.

elkiedee Fri 29-Aug-08 12:49:07

Is this a first or later DC, and what sort of shape/size are you now? Are you getting away without morning sickness?

1st baby, I didn't show that much until around 7 months, and before that even people who knew didn't think I showed until about 23/24 weeks, and that was those who were looking closely, no reason why your employers should be.

2nd time round a couple of women at work have guessed because I'm so tired, but I was 18 weeks on Monday and my mum commented on Sunday that I don't look very pg. I'm short and fat/curvy to start with though.

I mostly wear long skirts and have some longish tops which are loose fitting but not baggy. Do you have to dress smartly for the job?

ajm200 Fri 29-Aug-08 12:58:02

I don't think you have to tell then until you start to show or get your MATB1 form around 20 weeks.

First time round I was showing at 9 weeks! and everyone guessed. This time I could have hidden it until 24 weeks easily. I could still get into my normal jeans at 29 weeks but they were tight.

digitalgirl Fri 29-Aug-08 13:06:22

I was offered a job when I was 10 weeks pregnant. I told my employer to be, because I felt it was only fair to let them know as soon as possible so they would know how long they had with me. To have withdrawn the job offer would have been discriminatory, and pretty bloody obvious. Besides, they got to use my skills for 6 months, and for that they were grateful.

I know this isn't the case with all employers, but if you've been offered the job in the first place, then they obviously think you're worth employing. To sack you within 3 months would be just as much upheaval for them as finding maternity cover in 6 months time. If you started the job whilst pregnant then your maternity leave won't cost them a penny. You'll get SMP direct from the government. This could be something to mention when you do tell them you're pregnant.

Today's my last day of working and my employers have been totally supportive of my pregnancy. They've allowed me to work from home 2 days a week for the last month, take as much time off as necessary for ante-natal appointments.

I can understand your reluctance to want to say anything until you're completely sure this pregnancy is safe, but I think once you've reached that point you'll want them on your side. And that's more likely to happen if you're up front and honest. It'll be a huge weight off your shoulders. Why not let them deal with the burden of finding a replacement for when you come to take your maternity leave, rather than you deal with the stress of covering up your pregnancy?

However, if you'd rather wait till your probation is over then you're not obliged to say anything till 24 weeks.

BumblBeee Fri 29-Aug-08 14:28:49

elkiedee :

I am short and have a hernia which makes me look kind of pregnant anyway. Not sure if this is good or bad?!

I can wear smart casual.

2nd baby.

xxn

BumblBeee Fri 29-Aug-08 14:35:09

thanks digitalgirl.

I felt like I didn't need strikes against me in a competitive job market and could not afford to apply and interview over and over again until i found a family friendly employer. I need to eat too!

I agree with various points you made.

thomasina1 Fri 29-Aug-08 15:51:09

This site is great for working out maternity pay, dates, etc. tiger.direct.gov.uk/cgi-bin/maternity.cgi?

Romans8v30 Fri 29-Aug-08 16:10:07

I was in the same situation as you, my old contract was running out when I found out I was pg. So I went job hunting and found a great job...when I started my morning sickness had gone but I wasnt showing yet.

I told my boss a few days after I started as I wanted to be straight with them and I had a MW appointment the next day. I felt awful aboyt telling them but they were great about it. I worked up until I was 36weeks and they were really supportive.

Just remember they have to PROVE the reason they are getting rid of you, they cant just say after 3months you are not right for the job. It is very hard to get rid of a pregnant women unless you are no good at your job (still need to prove it)or they cant afford to get you.

A month before I was due back I had a meeting with them to say that I was handing in my notice due to mot wanting to work full time, they asked if I would come back part time but once we worked out the money it wasnt worth it.

I had thought that because I hadnt been honest with them that it was going to bite me in the bum, but it didnt so dont be so quick to think that it wont work out.

BumblBeee Fri 29-Aug-08 16:20:33

thomasina1: fantastic, thanks xxxx

Romans8v30: i am on 3 month trial however and they can get rid of me during this time

Romans8v30 Fri 29-Aug-08 16:22:30

but as I said they would have to find a dam good reason to get rid of you. It maybe esier for you not to say anything but I couldnt I was showing at 16wks.

cathym Fri 29-Aug-08 16:24:31

Things may have changed since the last time I had to research employment law due to problems I was having at work, but until you have 1 years service under your belt your employer is allowed to dismiss you without giving a reason. When I had to check this out a few years ago it had just changed from 2 years to 1 year. Until then you don't really have too much in the way of employment rights.

However, you do have some rights, and that includes not being dimissed because of things such as pregnancy. Given this I think a company would have to be pretty stupid to dismiss someone who was pregnant unless they had some pretty good evidence that there were problems with that person. If they don't have a good reason and they know you are pregnant you are on to a clear win at an employment tribunal.

Different companies have different attitudes towards things like this though. I know of a company who had to make a number of redundancies but from the start of the process told the people who were pregnant (there were a few) that their jobs were safe. Some companies just don't think getting rid of someone who is pregnant whatever the reason is worth the risk. However, the company I work for recently made someone redundant whilst they were on maternity leave, but they really don't care about things like that.

I agree with being honest up front. I have always told my employer that I am pregnant straight away (now on no. 3). The first time I had just changed from a tempory contract to a permanent one, and knew I was pregnant when I was offered the permanent job. They were fine about it though.

Sorry for such a long post!

BumblBeee Fri 29-Aug-08 18:32:39

"unless they had some pretty good evidence that there were problems with that person. If they don't have a good reason and they know you are pregnant you are on to a clear win at an employment tribunal."

But conversely if you have only been at a job a week or two you have not proved that you were good at your job either.

I feel I should make a good impression before offering a downside.

You had already done this through your temporary contract.

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