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Gone overdue - lulumama are you there please?

(26 Posts)
PetitFilou1 Wed 27-Aug-08 07:17:32

I'm now three days past my due date with no3 and didn't really expect to go overdue as dd (no2) was early). I haven't had a mw check since 38 weeks as the last mw said there was 'no clinical reason' why I needed one. I would really like someone to have a look at what is going on down there - do you think that is reasonable?

TheBlonde Wed 27-Aug-08 07:43:20

Call your MW, they should at the very least be checking your BP etc

liahgen Wed 27-Aug-08 07:59:35

ime, you should have had a 40 wk appt.

Of course, you are not "really" overdue yet as pg lasts from 38-42 wks.

What would YOU like to do?

Was there a reason for your 1st baby to be early? What gestation were they born at?

There are natural methods of induction you could try..

sex
nipple stimulation, (use a breast bump, easier on the breast, less tiring for you)
clary sage
evening primrose oil capsules, (jury still out, but no harm)

You can ask them to check you, meybe a sweep if you are wanting that kind of thing.

PetitFilou1 Wed 27-Aug-08 08:03:06

I don't want to go to 42 weeks. I have two other children (ds 4 1/2 born at term, dd about to be 3 born at 39 weeks) dh is a doctor and is already on paternity leave as he was made to say when he would take it a long time ago angry

Haven't got time to do nipple stimulation for above two reasons grin and really really don't feel like sex but the others may be worth a try

liahgen Wed 27-Aug-08 08:07:19

well in that case, give your unit a call, and tell them you would like to be seen.

I know sex, at full term just feels a bit much, no inclination, or the acrobatics needed, grin

Easy for me to say, i know as i'm not 40 wks pg, and fed up but babies do have a habit of coming when they aRE READY.

Do you have everything ready? childcare in place? etc. Do you feel emotionally ready?

Sometimes, these things make a difference to when our babies arrive.

Sorry , I can't be more help. Do give mw's a call, would you be open to having a sweep?

belgo Wed 27-Aug-08 08:10:29

petitfilou - you need to have a midwife check up at 40 weeks, not only to check your bp, but also for the baby's heart rate.

Agree with Liahgen about the sex and nipple stimulation.

A sweep from the midwife and sex with dh that evening sent me into labour at 40+6, so I know it can work!.

LackaDAISYcal Wed 27-Aug-08 08:14:23

Oh, the wait is horrible when you are overdue, but I'm sure things will get going soon smile

Re the paternity leave; he can't legally be made to start his leave before the baby is born.

From Direct.gov

"How much paternity leave can you take?
As long as you meet certain conditions you can take either one or two weeks. You can't take odd days off and if you take two weeks they must be taken together.

You can choose to start the leave:

on the day the baby's born
a number of days or weeks after the baby's born
from a specific date after the first day of the week in which the baby's expected to be born
Your leave can start on any day of the week (but not before the baby is born), but has to finish within 56 days of the baby being born or, if the baby's born before the week it was due, within 56 days of the first day of that week.

If your partner has a multiple birth, you're only allowed one period of paternity leave"

Not sure what he can do about it now though, but rules are rules and his employer is breaking them by making him start his leave before the baby is even born!

more here

VictorianSqualor Wed 27-Aug-08 08:18:00

Another here that thinks you should call the mw and ask for a check-up, at the very least ask them to have a look at your cervix and see what is going on.

TBH, I totally understand not wanting to go to 42 weeks, I got to 41weeks with ds2 and it was killing me, DP had also had to take his paternity leave before we had the babyhmm, but you don't really have much choice!

belgo Wed 27-Aug-08 08:19:39

how stressful, having to take paternity leave before the birth.

VictorianSqualor Wed 27-Aug-08 08:25:23

Daisy,

"from a specific date after the first day of the week in which the baby's expected to be born"

The baby is expected to be born in week 40, so legally they can make you start from your due date.

DP had to use his holiday and take half days for the week after DS2 was born and was only able to do that because the HR lady liked him!
His real paternity leave they lost the form then 'granted him' 3 days as a 'good will gesture' which he took the day I was going to have the original CS.

LackaDAISYcal Wed 27-Aug-08 08:28:51

Oh, and of course you should be getting a 40 week check up where your mw should be discussing with you what happens next re sweeps, possible induction, expectant management etc; call your midwife and ask to be seen asap.

How did that work VS, as the rules clearly state that paternity leave can't start before the baby is born?

LackaDAISYcal Wed 27-Aug-08 08:31:23

oh, you've answered me already......I would've thought the "not before the baby is born" bit over-rides that though.

irrelevant here as DH can't afford to take paternity leave and has to use his holidays instead sad

PetitFilou1 Wed 27-Aug-08 10:11:03

Thanks all - mw has booked me in for a sweep on Sunday. She asked why I hadn't had a 40 week appt and said she could come today but didn't know when - since it was only for bp check and they won't do any internal looking - I didn't see the point. I cannot stay in all day with a 3 year old and 4 1/2 year old as we'll all go mad. She said 'you aren't relaxed and that is probably why nothing is happening' errr thanks for that gem of information - think I had worked that one out for myself! I never got this stressed with the two previous pregs - really wish I didn't feel like this sad

PetitFilou1 Wed 27-Aug-08 10:14:00

liahgen childcare not specifically in place as all in laws and parents live a long way away - but I do have a sister 45 minutes away. That doesn't help either - I am supposed to be having a homebirth as have a history of fast births - it is stressful for dh and me not knowing quite who is going to be available to help when the time comes. But absolutely nothing I can do about it tbh

liahgen Wed 27-Aug-08 10:15:01

that was helpful from mw. angry

Try and have eventful day with dc's today, go nice walk round the park or something in the fresh air.

Organoise nice dinner at home with your oh, (buy all ready to cook),

Obviously once you have plans, baby will decide to interrupt, (hopeful emoticon)

Is baby alert? Ypou have no concerns?

liahgen Wed 27-Aug-08 10:17:15

As A Doula, I see it all the time when mums are stressed about worrying about who will look after dc's etc, and you would be surprised how true it is, that mum won't labour until everything is ready.

Of course, it doesn't always work out like that, but a large proportion of the time.

I hope you get the hb, that you want.

Would it be unrealistic to have dc's there, (in the house, not necc room) while you are birthing?

aurorec Wed 27-Aug-08 10:21:05

Re sex (this is a TMI query) what is said to trigger labour- is it the orgasm or the sperm?
Cos I heard contradictory advice when I was 40 + 8 and really not in the mood for it.... grin

VictorianSqualor Wed 27-Aug-08 10:22:56

Both aurorec.

The orgasm can trigger ctx and the sperm has prolactin(?) in it.

liahgen Wed 27-Aug-08 10:23:09

well both really, prostaglandins that are present in sperm, are the natural version of prostin.

orgasm works by stimulating uterine ctxs.

I will stand corrected if wrong, but fairly sure thats what it is.

PetitFilou1 Wed 27-Aug-08 15:44:20

liahgen You are probably right - have asked for mil to come over on Friday if nothing has happened by then. Last time I had a couple of warning contractions the day before so we were able to call her to come that day and the next day I had dd. This time I've had nothing - just braxton hicks which I've had from 15 weeks anyway.

I don't have a problem with the dcs being in the house at the time - just don't want them watching. I think they are too young and would be scared (although I may be wrong). However, I also think it is unlikely they wouldn't want to watch!

PetitFilou1 Wed 27-Aug-08 15:54:31

Oh and the baby is moving - although not as much. My feet and hands have swollen up but not to huge proportions and I think probably normal at this stage...

diddle Wed 27-Aug-08 16:07:36

petitfilou - The waiting is awful isn't it. mine were 2 wks and 1 week overdue. I can imagine its even worse when you were expecting an early one. Hope it arrives soon. To be honest we tried all the old wives tales and they didn't work. I think that it is coinsidence if it happens at the same time. I think the only proven one is sex but that isn't alwasy effective.

Baby will come when its ready and sadly not before. In my experience i would wait as long as you can. I was induced, which failed and ended in a c-section. not much fun.

relax, enjoy your time as a family of 4.
so easy for me to say, i know its hard when you're huge and fed up, but you're going to need as much energy as possible

liahgen Wed 27-Aug-08 16:14:36

tis quite normal for you to be a bit swollen at this stage as i'm sure you know but keep an eye on it.

Sometimes subsequent labours have a way of sneaking up on us aswell. grin

Keep us informed. x

liahgen Fri 29-Aug-08 11:34:56

how are you petitfilou?

Any news? smile

fransmom Fri 29-Aug-08 11:37:24

bump for lulu xx

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