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Have you just ^known^ everything was going to be alright - or not - in early pregnancy? If so, were you right or wrong?

(12 Posts)
rubles Fri 22-Aug-08 20:16:34

My SIL who works in an epu says that often she thinks women KNOW when a pregnancy is going to fail, they say that something just doesn't feel right for them and they turn out to be correct. My SIL obviously believes in women's intuition on these matters and she puts a lot of store in a woman's gut feeling.

I have had four pregnancies so far. The first - I can't remember what I felt, the second - it never felt right (I was correct, I MCd at 9 weeks), the third - I felt preg from the word go (again correct, had dd2), then this one - I really don't think it is a goer, but am really hoping I am wrong. I really hope it is just paranoia.

Have you ever just known deep down that things were going to go well or not, and if so were you always right, or is it just coincidence do you think if things go as you feel they will? Is my SIL right, do you think?

I sincerely hope not.

I hope that makes sense!

WorzselMummage Fri 22-Aug-08 21:14:18

My first 2 i knew were not going to result in a baby, i mc'd them both at 8 weeks.

My 3rd i knew i'd miscarry again, my daughters almost 4.

The 4th i felt positive untill about 8 weeks, started making plans then one day i woke up and something told me it wasnt to be i had my scan at 13 weeks to be told the baby had died at 8 weeks.

I'm currently 8+3 and trying my hardest not to feel anything.

LittleMyDancingForJoy Fri 22-Aug-08 21:16:34

Difficult. Our last one ended badly, and I think I felt bad about it from the beginning, but that could just be hindsight.

I know I didn't feel as relaxed about it as I did with DS, but then first time round I think it's quite different anyway, you're not so aware of what can go wrong iyswim?

Hopeysgirlwasntbig Fri 22-Aug-08 21:22:38

I've had 4 pregnancies, and all of them I thought early on it was going to go badly, I miscarried my first, but went on to have 3 healthy babies.

Early cramps and spotting were cause for concern! I just convinced myself that I wasn't capable of producing a baby at the end!

rubles Fri 22-Aug-08 21:38:56

It's true about hindsight, it does cloud your memory of how you felt...did you really know something or was it just one of many feelings you had at the time, but you only manage to remember that one once you know the outcome iyswim.

I just feel so utterly convinced about this pg not working out, that I wonder if there is something in it. (Then I worry I am going to jinx it with my negative thoughts, so try to be upbeat and talk to my tummy).

Your stories kind of give the impression that the gut instinct is not 100% reliable, and is probably fuelled by some sub-conscious logic...maybe?

Worzsel, good luck. Have you had any scans to reassure you yet? 8 weeks sounds like a mentally very difficult time for you, so here's a big hand squeeze across the internet to try and keep you strong.

HeinzSight Fri 22-Aug-08 21:45:48

how funny rubles, I've just namechanged from Hopeysgirlwasnt big to HeinzSight!!! grin

rubles Sat 23-Aug-08 06:50:43

smile

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight Sat 23-Aug-08 07:39:12

No, I think generally it doesn't cross people's minds until the first time they mc (either that or they 'know' it will fail because of paraoia or excess googling) and after a mc women are often very fearful that it will happen again.
I know that next time I get pg I'll be comparing it with both my pgs and if it resembles the first one I'm sure I'll 'know' it's going to fail whatever the result...

WorzselMummage Sat 23-Aug-08 11:07:42

Thanks Rubles

I dont think this pregnancys a goer though, i'm spotting and my symptoms have all but gone which is exactly the same story as my last MMC. Of course this all happens on a bank holiday weekend.

HeinzSight Sat 23-Aug-08 11:52:13

Worzsel, I spotted loads during my last pregnancy, my DD is now coming up to 1. All my spotting came from my cervix. Wishing you all the very best of luck with this pregnancy.

HeinzSight Sat 23-Aug-08 11:54:45

Worzsel, I spotted loads during my last pregnancy, my DD is now coming up to 1. All my spotting came from my cervix. Wishing you all the very best of luck with this pregnancy.

blob2be Sat 23-Aug-08 12:58:32

With my first pg, I had no doubt that I would have a baby at the end of it (which I did). With the second, I miscarried before I even knew I was pregnant. Third, I 'knew' something was wrong as soon as the test came up positive - i never really believed that it would work out - and it didn't.

However, I am now 13.5 weeks pg again and I was certain that I would lose this one too. So far it all seems fine, and I'm starting to believe it will be OK.

It seems to me that you can't really ever separate out your 'instincts' or 'gut feelings' from fear, paranoia, painful memories or past experience. This is especially true if you've had previous m/c - you find it very difficult to believe that your body has the capacity to produce a baby. That can really distort what you might otherwise think was your 'instincts'.

Best of luck to everyone smile

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