Maternity nurse/night nanny - a good idea?

[completelyconfused]

I'm due in Nov (first baby) and friends have recommended hiring a maternity nurse for a few days after the baby's born to help us out. I'm loathe to spoil what I HOPE will be a precious and bonding time for me and DH and baby while he's off work for the first two weeks, but maybe after that to help get into a routine? It's so hard to know what you will need but I hear you have to book in advance or pay steep "emergency rates"... Anyone got an opinion?? Am a bit confused about the difference between a post-natal doula, a night nanny and a mat nurse.........

[giddykipper]

As you said, I wouldn't spoil the precious bonding time for you and DH and baby. You'll be tired but it will be lovely.

[mslucy]

good idea if you've got lots of cash - the going rate is £600 p/w!

If you're really into breastfeeding, it's not for you, but if you're happy to mix, can afford it and feel like death if you don't sleep, then go for it.

I've also known people who hire a doula to come and help out after the birth - this can be a useful thing too.

They're much more likely to be pro breastfeeding/organic stuff - maternity nurses are more old school.

[thehouseofmirth]

I'd spend the cash on a cleaner, laundry service and takeaways instead and take the time to get to know your baby. Although it seems really daunting, the best (well, really only) expert on your baby is you and if you try and relax and have confidence in your abilities you'll find a rhythm that suits you all in time.

[poshtottie]

CC, I am a maternity nurse (not old school, pro-breastfeeding etc. It doesn't sound like a maternity nurse would suit you though I have recently worked for a mum and just helped her with bf when she was ready to give up. I also made sure she ate well and I even cooked dinner for her and her husband. I gave her lots of advice about routines for the future as they don't really work in the early days.

I would wait and see how you feel though as they tend to get bookings in advance. If you feel really exhausted after the first few weeks then get someone to do the nights or get help around the house etc.

£600 is probably the minimum you would pay for 5 days 24 hours.

[poshtottie]

Mslucy, of course some are very old school but I think the profession has changed somewhat.

[mslucy]

my apologies poshtottie.

I'm afraid I'm judging your profession by the old dragon my friend hired to work for her - which of course is very wrong.

[laura325630]

I would love to be able to afford one!! DD is 7 weeks old now and the broken nights are getting me down now. I would love a few nights of full sleep but with dd in the house knowing she is safe. Maybe worth doing after a few weeks, they tend to get them into routines for you aswell if you can find a good one.

[Pannacotta]

A think a postnatal doula would be cheaper and probably more hands off, as they tend to help the parents rather than look after the baby and think they will help round the house, say with siblings/cooking/making tea etc etc.
Some info here
www.doula.org.uk/default.asp

[slinkiemalinki]

I had a friend who had a night nanny a few nights a week which gave them a break (she can bring the baby to you if you are breastfeeding). I do know people who have had them and frankly found it a bit too much. I suppose it depends on the baby you are blessed with - with my daughter it would have been a waste of money as she was easy and only woke up once in the night. I already have cleaning/laundry help and just wouldn't have wanted a stranger around 24/7 no matter how experienced and lovely she was.

[Yorky]

I am expecting our second in November, come on over and join the Due Nov thread.
I have been looking into the total no chance of us affording this kind of help as DH may not be able to take his leave immediately baby arrives. I found when we had the first though that it wasn't as bad as I'd been led to expect, MWs check on you fairly regularly and with meals in the freezer and DH around we coped quite happily

[completelyconfused]

Thanks for all your help! Obviously if all goes swimmingly I won't need this sort of help but would be good to know where to look if I turn out to be the world's most useless mother!!! Is it a case of looking on websites?
Yorky - how I find the Due Nov thread?? (am obv world's most useless mnetter!)

[tostaky]

Confused - i'm like you1 1st babe in Nov and bf wants to look for some help after the birth just in case...

No idea whats the best solution.. i was thinking about a doula but what is the difference with a maternity nurse?

also instead of paying for a week of service, can you have a pay-as-you-go kind of arrangement? like I need someone for the day today but i'll be ok for the rest of the week and maybe next week i need someone for 1/2 day or something

the thing is i dont know what i'll need!!!

[completelyconfused]

exactly tostaky! would just be good to know what the options are then if you need help you know who to call - kind of pointless booking someone expensive for a week when you might not need them... i guess that's what mothers are meant to be for but mine isn't around and the thought of DH's mum coming to stay makes my blood pressure soar!

[Yorky]

If I knew how to do links... We're in the antenatal clubs thread list
I'm thinking of getting a cleaner a couple of days a week and making sure freezer is full, but as far as baby help goes we can't afford anyone.
Am hoping that bf can pop in a couple of evenings after work, but like you CC having MIL around will not be relaxing!

[woodmill100]

Our DS is 4 weeks old and we'd love some help for a couple of nights about now. His patterns were different when we first got him home and he slept quite a bit. Now he's awake most of the day and sleeps a bit at night!

Someone said above that you may find a cleaner/laundry service more of a help. We've had a cleaner but no laundry and I have found their help brilliant.