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So we have almost decided on No. 3!!! Is there anywhere or anyone I can go to re: body issues?

(28 Posts)
mosschops30 Mon 28-Jul-08 11:19:04

Me and dh have decided we would like to complete our family with No.3.
Its a good time for all of us, in almost every way.

The only issue for me is losing my figure and not having any control over my body for 9months and some months thereafter.
With dd I was almost immediately back to normal within a few weeks (I was 21 though). With ds its taken me a good 2-3 years before I feel good about my body again through a lot of hard work I am back to a size 8.
So the thought of being fat fills me with dread.

Is there someone or somewhere I can go or speak to about this, who can help me deal with this. Its the only stumbling block we have at the moment

EBenes Mon 28-Jul-08 12:42:29

Davina McCall? She was telling the Sunday Mirror yesterday that her stomach is flatter than ever before. Also Posh Spice has had three and seemed to er... regain her weight as a 7 year old. I have the same worries now pregnant with number 2, but friends tell me you get back your body, whether you like it or not, and any changes are just down to age, not pregnancy. That's hard for me to believe when I am gaining weight so quickly, all over, not just on bump.

ThePettyandIllinformedGoat Mon 28-Jul-08 12:45:11

you could work out a game plan. research diet and exercise throughout pregnancy and make a plan to start pilates or some such 2 months after the birth.

tbh you are lucky this is your only stumbling block.

PetitFilou1 Mon 28-Jul-08 13:50:48

Counselling or see a personal trainer and get a plan going beforehand

It would be a bit sad imo if this was the only thing that stopped you having a baby you really wanted.

PetitFilou1 Mon 28-Jul-08 13:50:51

Counselling or see a personal trainer and get a plan going beforehand

It would be a bit sad imo if this was the only thing that stopped you having a baby you really wanted.

mosschops30 Mon 28-Jul-08 13:58:32

They have personal trainers at the gym I go to so I could maybe speak to one of them to see if anyone specialises in fitness in pregnancy.

Im a bit scared of counselling, in case they get rid of my issues and I get fat grin

mosschops30 Mon 28-Jul-08 18:47:26

bump anyone else dealt with this?

me23 Mon 28-Jul-08 18:57:39

when I was pregnant I didn't put on too much weight. you are only supposed to eat an extra 200 calories a day, not trough your whole pregnancy either. what I'm saying is the fact your a size 8 means you probably won't put on that much weight anyway. as long as you eat a sensible diet. I was still in size 10 jeans at 9 months (ok they wouldn't do up) now though 3 years later I'm a 14-16 because I put it on after the birth. esp in the last year! bit it's got nothing to do with the pregnancy.
don't worry you will be fine.

expatinscotland Mon 28-Jul-08 19:08:25

Well, I've not gained much at all this time round, and it's all bump/in front.

I'm 26 weeks and this baby continues to keep my weight in check by making me sick - he is so high up he makes me feel constantly full and if I eat too much I vomit.

He also gives me wretched heartburn that's barely controlled by Zantac and Gaviscon in combination so I can't induldge in my favourite, spicy foods and eat a diet I find fit for an invalid.

But at least, I won't have very much weight to lose after he's born!

The no-drinking and limiting caffeine thing is a bitch, though, tbh.

hatcam Mon 28-Jul-08 22:04:42

mosschops30 - you don't need to gain lots of weight when you're pregnant and can stay fit throughout, no probs.

am a personal trainer specialising in pre and post natal fitness, also pregnant with 2nd baby and still keeping fit at 30 weeks. V. happy to answer any specific questions if it'll help and offer any advice on what you should be asking a potential trainer/asking at the gym to make sure you're getting someone who's properly qualified.

totally understand the body issue thing, but as it's perfectly manageable it would be a real shame to let it get in the way of adding to your family. more often than not it seems like it's to do with feeling 'out of your control' with your body when you're pregnant and it can seem really scary. with good advice you can feel v. happy with all the weirdness (well most of it) that goes on when you're pregnant and like I've already said, having a baby and piling on the pounds don't have to go hand in hand.

mosschops30 Tue 29-Jul-08 10:04:47

wow hatcam thats great thanks smile

so what sort of things should I be asking at the gym? Do i speak to the fitness manager to see if any of the trainers specialise in pregnancy fitness, or will they all have done it as part of their training (I belong to a gym which only takes level 3 qualification .... or something like that, so theyre all well trained).
Its definately the out of control thing thats worrying, at the moment I eat well and healthily but I control my weight by exercising regularly 3/4 times a week doing spin/swimming/gym/pilates.

Im just terrified that it will seem too much for me, my issues only really started after ds was born because I felt like my shape changed so much even though it was all bump, i just hated the flabby tummy afterwards

poshtottie Tue 29-Jul-08 10:25:02

hatcam, which course did you do for your
pregnancy fitness and post-natal?

woose Tue 29-Jul-08 12:28:19

I feel the same as you Mosschops. I am PG with 2nd child. Before first DS was born was size 8 and did loads of exercise, specifically swimming. Throughout the pregnancy I continued this and felt great and had no health issues. I did put on 3 1/2 stone though. However, afterwards I got my figure back after about 6 months and felt in control and happy with the way I looked. However, now pregnant again 32 weeks and looking after toddler I don't have any time to exercise and feel miserable because although I have not put on so much weight I feel unfit and have had more health problems. The way I am dealing with it is that I have a plan of action to start exercising again after the baby, to begin with I will just do small amounts and do loads of walking and dancing round the living room to music, then build up. I definitely think that the more you keep active during the pregnancy, the easier it is to get back into shape afterwards. I also think that even if you just do a little bit it makes a massive difference to you and your health and self esteem because it feels as if you are re-gaining control.

hatcam Tue 29-Jul-08 15:08:27

mosschops - I would speak to the fitness manager, it's important to know that not all qualifications require trainers to have studied exercising in pregnancy, even if they meet the Level 3 REPS criteria. It would be best to get someone who has had the training and who has experience in the area. There are a number of training courses around that cover exercise in pregnancy. Premier & YMCA are probably the most obvious, also a company that offers training courses solely in exercise in pregnancy, called Burrell Training - so those would be the names to look for. See what the gym can offer you and if doesn't seem clear I'll happily give some advice.

If you want someone away from the gym, try the NRPT (National Register of Personal Trainers) where you can search by area and then by someone's specialisation/skills.

Let me know how you get on!

Poshtottie - I did a PT Diploma with Premier in the old days when you had to do your final exam in exercise in pregnancy. I've also done the Burrell Training Course, as well as a whole host of workshops/seminars on anatomical changes in pregnancy, SPD (girdle pain), pelvic floor rehab etc - some good and some bad! I train private clients (pregnant and post natal) and run Buggyfit here which I love, we've had about 250 mums and a few more babies join the classes in the last 18 months. Am pregnant with #2 at the moment and when I've popped I'm launching a fitness programme especially for pregnancy - mainly because I think it's pretty frustrating that there's such poor advice on exercise in pregnancy and women only feel able to go to aquafit or yoga, which doesn't suit everyone. The Royal College of Obs/Gynae recommends 30 mins of moderate activity daily in pregnancy and specifically says that ALL women should be encouraged to participate in aerobic and strength conditioning exercise in pregnancy - but there never seems to be much on offer.

Pah. That's my rant over!

LadyThompson Tue 29-Jul-08 15:33:34

We love Hatcam's advice [waves]

But Mosschops, mostly I think getting back in shape is perfectly attainable afterwards. It's just HARD, so don't despair.

hatcam Tue 29-Jul-08 15:49:34

ah bonjour LadyT

you're dead right. if it was easy I'd spend my entire life eating cake, pie and more pie. Mmmmmmmmm.

anyone who says they can eat anything they like is lying, anyone who tells you they have a magic solution for getting fit/weight loss is lying and anyone who says you don't need to break a sweat to get fit is telling a porky pie too.

(Hmmmm, suspects Hatcam has pregnancy related pie obsession)

badsmell Tue 29-Jul-08 16:00:46

I am thinking of having another baby too and completely understand your concern about feeling out of control. If you have returned to normal after yr first two there can't be any reason why you won't with your next baby. Do you think that maybe other people don't see the extra weight you have - you sound like you may be one of those lucky people who bounces back v quickly! bounce is an unfortunate word but I am sure you know what I mean.

I have a quick question for Hatcham, I do pilates at the moment. I don't go to a class but have a go at home with darcy bussell on her dvd. Is it ok to continue pilates into pegnancy and the later stages of pregnancy? Should all abdominal exercises be avoided?

Mosschops - I hope this is all making you feel better!

poshtottie Tue 29-Jul-08 18:26:21

Hatcam I did the "fit to deliver" course in London last year with Karen Nordal.

It was very intense but only a weekend so a bit crammed. Would love to do another course and run a pregancy fit class.

pgwithnumber3 Tue 29-Jul-08 18:35:59

mosschops, I feel very much the same as you. Before I had DD1, I am not too modest to admit, I had a perfect figure (I didn't appreciate or realise this though until after I had children). I ran for miles every week and watched every morsel of food I put in my mouth.

After DD1 was born, I was not as vain about myself, I breast fed for 9 months and when I stopped, I got back out running and watched my weight. Got my figure back no problems.

Got pg with DD2, only put on 2 stone and didn't really have too much trouble losing that weight but the skin on my stomach was never quite as good. Boobs are another story. I came to the conclusion that life is too short to be constantly worrying about how perfect your figure is and wanted to enjoy food and have a glass of wine without panicking.

Got pregnant with DC3 (currently am 13 weeks). Am starting to get a bump and now am worrying about what state my body (stomach and boobs) are going to be in after I have given birth, in fact the thought fills me with dread. I have managed to not get any stretch marks and I also panic that I may get them in this pregnancy,

All I can advise you is to eat sensibly, walk a lot and enjoy yourself (have nice food etc) as your body is doing a wonderful thing when it bears children. Would you rather have a perfect figure and be childless? I certainly wouldn't!

If all fails, book in a tummy tuck and boob job - I will be! wink

mosschops30 Tue 29-Jul-08 19:18:25

Thank you all so much for such a positive thread smile

I guess like you pgno.3 I feel that I got away with it on no.1, no.2 was a struggle to get it back and Im terrified that with No.3 my body will just give up looking good no matter how hard I work at it!

Thanks for the advice hatcam. I have a spin class tomorrow which the fitness manager runs so i will speak to him then. I would prefer to carry on going to my fitness club because I like the variety it offers me. Hatcam do you know if theres any reason why you wont get back to normal after no.3??

All in all feeling much better from all your great posts smile

hatcam Tue 29-Jul-08 20:10:11

evening all

poshtottie - would you recommend the course? are you already working as a PT or instructor? think there's lots of market for pregnancy fitness classes, there's so much farking rubbish advice around!

badsmell - you can do abs exercises all the way through pregnancy but you do have to do different ones to some of the more traditional ones. also, you can do pilates too but you can't do all the exercises, so you prob need to find a class or switch to a pregnancy pilates class (to be on the safe side). Do you rate the DVD you're doing - haven't tried that one?

mosschops - no reason at all why you can't get back to normal after no3!! Sometimes the old knockers get a bit tired looking but nothing a good bra can't fix. Sometimes your hips look a bit wider (as pelvic bones do widen for childbirth phew) but this is as much after #1 as after #3 - and wider hips just make your waist look smaller hurray. Some people get the wrinkly tummy, some don't - it's in your genetic make-up sadly, so blame your mum and go for soft lighting when you're getting fruity.

finally don't worry and enjoy being pregnant! (although with this little boy headbanging my bladder day and night I can think of more enjoyable pastimes.....)

poshtottie Tue 29-Jul-08 20:57:05

Hatcam, I would reccommend the course for any trainer looking to personal train pregnant clients yes, though I think the course should be longer. It was rarther rushed.

Karen Nordal is an obstetrician and has a wealth of knowledge.

I used to be a trainer and gym instructor. I was interested in teaching a class but haven't got set up yet as have ds to look after and when I do work I do maternity nursing (when dh is home on leave). It pays better.grin
Personal training doesn't pay well in my area.

pgwithnumber3 Tue 29-Jul-08 21:30:28

I think having multiples does more damage to your skin and stomach than having one baby after the other. So just keep your fingers crossed you don't have quads!

badsmell Tue 29-Jul-08 21:47:35

hatcham - it is a good dvd, it doesn't cover the breathing techniques but nonetheless it is excellent. Darcy Bussell has had 2 babies by caesarian and looks pretty good. Now I bet she was worried about going back to work after her children.

mosschops30 Thu 31-Jul-08 10:40:00

hi all smile

hatcam, I spoke to the fitness manager last night, who said that none of them specialise in ante/postnatal fitness but he said they can advise on what is safe and whats not, also one of the trainers did her dissertation on this subject so I could ask her too.

Basically my spin and pilates instructors said I can continue to exercise as I have been (so spin and rpm ok in 1st and 2nd trimester) and pilates also. They did say I would have to give up any balance stuff as my centre of gravity changes, so any exercises on the swiss ball etc.

Is this right??

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