Please help anxiety sky high with second pregnancy after miscarriage

(16 Posts)
Iucy95 Fri 13-Nov-20 11:35:06

Hi,I had a missed miscarriage in September of this year and then found out end of October we were pregnant again. In my head I've already lost the baby, I am meant to be 5 weeks 3 days today,I have no symptoms, I had my HCG level checked and it was 7745 which I think seems quite high for 5 weeks anybody have advice? Xx

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Fruitloops34 Fri 13-Nov-20 11:41:18

Hi OP,

I’ve never personally had a miscarriage, I’m 15 weeks with my first. However I can imagine the anxiety you feel as I’ve felt it as well through every week.

5+3 is super super early and you probably wouldn’t have any symptoms yet at that stage.

I know it’s easier said that done but you need to try and just let things go with the flow as there is nothing you can to prevent something that may not even happen.

The fact that you’ve had one miscarriage actually means the odds are even lower for you to have another.

Wishing you well.

Ginfilledcats Fri 13-Nov-20 11:49:47

Hey, I had a miscarriage June 2019 at 10 weeks and it destroyed me. I fell again in the September and am currently feeding 5month old dd to sleep. It's wonderful.

But for 9 months I was convinced I was going to lose her every day. Every time I had a wee I checked for blood. Every movement or cramp, or lack of was horrifically worrisome.

I'd get a scan ASAP for reassurance then call to register with local maternity unit and explain your history, and ask to see the mental Heath midwives or the midwives who specialises in pregnancy after loss. I wish I'd done this far sooner.

I had tonnes of extra scans and counselling at the end to support me which helped loads.

Keep off google, and mums net!

Good luck. I have everything crossed for you!

Iucy95 Fri 13-Nov-20 11:56:31

Thank you both! I suffer with anxiety naturally so this is extremely hard @Ginfilledcats you are right I keep googling and have convinced myself I have everything from molar to ectopic. My HCG is higher then what Google says it should be so that is worrying me I have a early scan booked in first Friday of December which seems a life time away!

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raspberryjamlove Fri 13-Nov-20 12:27:39

Hi and congrats on your pregnancy. I am in the same boat although am now 10+2 but I found out nearly a week before my missed period so feel like I've known forever! I had a missed miscarriage last year and found out at 9 weeks baby had stopped growing at 5 weeks. I was so heartbroken. I have been very anxious this pregnancy so far and yesterday I had my 2nd reassurance scan which has really helped. I'm trying to take it 1 day at a time xx

northerngal20 Fri 13-Nov-20 14:01:11

hello! firstly congrats! I know exactly how you feel - I'm currently 8 weeks along after a mmc in august, and the anxiety is unreal! i wouldn't worry about lack of symptoms, it's still early days and i think it's normal for them to come and go (or not even have hit) for a few weeks yet. It's great you have a scan booked in for a few weeks time. My epu offered a reassurance scan which i had a few days ago and it was definitely a helpful milestone for me to work towards that didn't seem as far away as the 12 week scan. I'm trying to take each day as it comes and giving myself small things to look forward to during the week/weekends so that i can try to take my mind of things until the next scan now. Good luck and hope you have a happy and healthy pregnancy!!

Moominmiss Fri 13-Nov-20 14:02:55

Sending hugs, I know how you feel.
I’m currently 4+3 after 3 losses this year, one at 9 weeks and then 2 subsequent chemicals.
I wish I had some advice on how to not over worry about it all. I’m currently trying to remain positive until I have a reason not to be.
Just remember the fact you have mc once has no bearing at all on this pregnancy. It’s a whole new egg and a whole new sperm.


Wolfiefan Fri 13-Nov-20 14:04:53

Just wanted to stop in and wish you all the best. My first pg ended in a mmc. My second pg ended with DS arriving. I now have two kids.

Poppy10121 Fri 13-Nov-20 14:38:06

I had a missed miscarriage earlier this year and am currently 19 weeks. My only advice is to stop googling if you can. Stop looking things up on Mumsnet and other forums, sign up to a reputable newsletter that will give you weekly updates on your pregnancy (e.g. Tommy's do a weekly email) and do your best to avoid further reading and self-diagnosis.
Earlier on in my pregnancy I spent a lot of time on MC forums and reading about it, I started to feel like those outcomes were more likely than a healthy pregnancy which is not true. It is a waiting game at this stage, but if you can go for a reassurance scan around 10 weeks, either through EPU or privately, that should be a good indication if you can't wait til 12 weeks. Sending hugs, it is hard xx

MrsMDD Fri 13-Nov-20 17:35:46

So glad I found this thread. Currently 5 +1 (I hope) after a mmc in July and I am freaking out. I also found out at 3 + 4 which is super early for me. I have a 10 year old and an 18 month both of which I was so sick on and then I didn't have any sickness on the mmc so now with little to no symptoms again im so sad and worried that this is not to be as well. I have a scan booked for December 1st. I've tried to feel positive but im so scared the mmc destroyed me. I got my hcg levels done last Thursday when I would have been 4 weeks then got them done yesterday and while getting them done they told me last weeks was 128.8 (which seems really low for 4 weeks) but I wont know whether they are doubling or not until next week.

MrsMDD Fri 13-Nov-20 17:37:23

I also suffer with anxiety and I just feel like I can't breathe with it all confused

GrandTheftWalrus Fri 13-Nov-20 18:00:55

I was the same op. I had a mmc in may. I only found out at a private scan.

I then fell pregnant again in August and found out in September. I was about 5+3 when I found out and my only symptom was feeling sick. I was on holiday at the time and thought it was because of the alcohol lol.

I then went for a private scan at 8 weeks and saw a heartbeat. I then had my nhs scan and was put forward a week so its growing well.

I was terrified though until that nhs scan.

Its very hard not to worry. Big hugs x

SkyBlue20 Fri 13-Nov-20 18:58:34

I really feel for you OP. I had a MMC in March of this year, found out at my 12 week scan. Got pregnant again in July and am now 23 weeks. The journey has been difficult but I promise you, it gets easier. The first trimester is the worst, all I can say is focus on little milestones - making it to five weeks, registering with the midwife, six weeks, early scan, booking appt, etc. Those small steps make it seem a bit more manageable than thinking about the full thing at once. Then after your 12 week scan you’ll relax a little bit and a bit more again after your 20 week. I’ve started feeling movements in the last week or so and that’s helped again. The anxiety is still there, I won’t lie - I still check the tissue every time I go to the toilet - but it’s not as heavy.
As others have said, keep away from stories on the internet and just focus on one day at a time. I promise, the time will pass quicker than you think.
Sending you lots of love and positive thoughts xx

Iucy95 Fri 13-Nov-20 23:26:04

Thank you so much everyone for your kind words and sharing your stories with me it is so reassuring to hear positive stories I sometimes feel like it's only negative ones out there! Tonight I started getting bad shoulder pain and epu have booked me a emergency scan on Sunday to make sure it's not ectopic please keep everything crossed for me! @MrsMDD I pray everything goes well and you see those numbers double! ❤️

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MrsMDD Mon 16-Nov-20 19:06:55

@Iucy95 I have everything crossed for you I hope your ok. My hcg went from 128 to 3000 in a week so im hoping this baby is sticking. Scan in 2 weeks and I will know. The wait is killing me.

Iucy95 Wed 18-Nov-20 15:14:04

Hi everyone, Just thought I'd give a quick update went for scan Sunday sac and yolk seen no fetus and some blood round sac but HCG rising another scan today fetus and heartbeat seen but still blood around sac extremely early days but I am praying this one stays with us x

OP’s posts: |

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