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High BMI

(25 Posts)
DontFadeAway Wed 09-Sep-20 01:04:16

Hi ladies, I'm currently only 4w+3 with my first baby and I am looking for some reassurance and positive experiences. I have a high BMI and am absolutely terrified about my booking in app with the midwife. I know I'm over weight, I've lost a significant amount of weight over the last year but still have a long way to go. I'm so anxious im going to be looked down on or "lectured" about my weight. I'm fully aware there are more risks involved and know I need to be told about them.

Basically, I just want to hear any positive stories/experiences you've had with your midwife/booking in/appointments/scans if you're in a similar position to me with a high BMI. I'm driving myself crazy with worry.

Sorry for waffling and thank you! ♥️

OP’s posts: |
SUBisYodrethwhenLarping Wed 09-Sep-20 01:19:23

I had and still do have a very high BMI when my DC were born quite a while ago

I find that if you want to get a good reaction say - yes I know I am very FAT and use the word fat as it kind of owns it

Good luck smilesmilesmile

BritInAus Wed 09-Sep-20 01:31:00

Hi, please try not to stress. You aren't the first and won't be the last overweight woman to ever fall pregnant. Be ready for the midwife/Dr to weigh you, note your weight and mention it. I doubt you'll get a lecture - again, you won't be the only overweight woman the midwife sees that day. They may not say much at all, or they may just talk a bit extra about minimising weight gain through pregnancy, and extra/early gestational diabetes testing.

I had a baby with a high BMI. Had a private scan early on (I was travelling away from my home country so missed my booking appointment) and I was weighed but nothing more. At my first public hospital appointment, I was told that as I had a high BMI I couldn't have a water birth (I was interested in one) and my care would be under a doctor, not a midwife. I only saw that as a good thing - extra care!

Finally, I had to take a higher dose than normal of folate. I think that was honestly it?!

Please try not to stress. Weight is such a personal issue for many women, but you really aren't the only overweight person to have a baby and the midwife is unlikely to want to spend any extra time giving you a special lecture or berating you. It's not like you can suddenly drop 30kg or whatever during your pregnancy.

All the best for a healthy and happy pregnancy smile

The fact you've already lost weight is great.

Foreverbaffled Wed 09-Sep-20 05:14:16

Please don’t worry too much, I highly doubt you’ll get a lecture about it. Would be totally pointless given you’re already pregnant and they don’t recommend dieting in pregnancy anyway.

I’ve had a high BMI in both my pregnancy’s. It was 33 in my first one and barely mentioned (bar having a glucose tolerance test at 28 weeks.) It was 35 this time round which means I’m consultant led but honestly they couldn’t seem less interested (in a nice way!) and although it means I’m having an extra growth scan at 36 weeks nothing has changed. I can’t have a water birth which personally doesn’t bother me and I likely will have to give birth on delivery suite rather than the midwife unit (again my preference as I like to be where the good drugs are!) although I get that may upset other people more.

I have been trying to limit my weight gain this time. No one has told me to but it seems sensible. I’m 28 weeks and have put on 15lb so far and would like to keep weight gain to under 25lb for whole pregnancy.

Just try and enjoy this time. Oh and huge congratulations!! smile

HappyInL0nd0n Wed 09-Sep-20 05:34:56

I had a BMI of 39 for both my very healthy pregnancies. I was treated with respect, warmth & kindness throughout. Since completing our family, I've felt very motivated to make serious and lasting lifestyle changes so that has now come down significantly, but both my babies were perfectly healthy & beautiful on arrival. Do keep active, though. It's important for lots of reasons. Good luck to you & congratulations.

Smiling89 Wed 09-Sep-20 06:38:28

My BMI is high and have had no problems whatsoever either.

They've only ever talked about my weight in a professional manner and in regards to how clinical decisions are made. Never once with any judgement in their voice and never mentioned more than necessary.

Even when I had my first scan and the picture was unclear due to my weight, the sonographer never said anything but I knew that was the reason and it was on my printed notes as the reason. They're very respectful. Everyone I've encountered to date has been lovely.

As a pp said, own it and don't pretend like the fat isn't there and they won't have any issues with you. You can still request to treatment a certain way but as long as you accept some things may be different and recognise why they are suggesting what they are, no one will be mean.

So far, I've just have to take 150mg aspirin since 16 weeks, been given 3 extra growth scans (more chances to see bubs!), consultant appointments and birth will be at the main hospital not the local maternity suite (not too fussed about having to be near all the doctors just in case I need Caesarean), injection will be given straight away to deliver placenta as higher risk of haemorrhage (don't see this as a big issue). So all in all - just lots of extra appointments.

Smiling89 Wed 09-Sep-20 06:39:18

Oh and also the glucose test for diabetes (but would have had to have that due to family history anyway....)

empQ Wed 09-Sep-20 06:46:39

Congrats OP!

Maybe someone has mentioned already - but - If your BMI is over 30 your should be on 5mg of folic acid which your GP will prescribe.

DontFadeAway Wed 09-Sep-20 08:17:46

Oh my goodness, I didn't expect quite a response. Thank you all so much ♥️ it's so lovely to hear some positive care stories and you've all been so kind. I think I'm going to make the initial phone call to the midwife on Friday, to let them know I'm pregnant! It all seems so surreal still ✨

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RWK29 Wed 09-Sep-20 08:32:44

@DontFadeAway Again, as everyone else has said, please don’t stress about it!! Currently 32 weeks pregnant and I had a BMI of 35.2 at my booking appointment. My weight was mentioned at booking in a very clinical way - there wasn’t any judgement 😊

Was prescribed 5mg of Folic Acid, have to take 150mg Aspirin daily from 20 weeks, and have extra growth scans at 32/36/40 weeks. I’m supposed to be consultant led but as my BP/bloods/urine have all been fine whenever checked they’ve said my case isn’t “juicy enough” for a consultant and I’ll only be referred if anything changes 😊 Have to give birth in the labour ward and not in a midwife led unit which doesn’t bother me as it’s what I would have chosen anyway 😊

Also with scans I’ve had no issues related to weight 🤷🏻‍♀️ And I carry all my weight on my belly. My 20 week scan they struggled with one certain image of baby but that was due to baby being awkward and moving every way except the way they needed 😂 so did have to pop back just to double check everything a week later but that was fine 😊

I did buy a blood pressure monitor just because I was nervous about any potential issues and I’ve still only had my BP measured twice up until this point due to Covid and phone appointments but all fine so far 🤞🏼🤞🏼

BeMorePacific Wed 09-Sep-20 08:39:37

I haven’t had any issues, I’m now 32 weeks pregnant. I took a higher dose of folic acid, and I’m on 75mg of aspirin.
I’ve been weighed twice my whole pregnancy (which doesn’t bother me). But if it did I’d just say no to getting weighed.
Congratulations on your pregnancy xxx

Gigitree Wed 09-Sep-20 08:41:44

Congratulations!
My BMI was 53 when I had my little girl 12 weeks ago. Absolutely no complications for me or my little one. We had all the extra stuff like those above have mentioned.

Don’t be worried about your booking in appt. in my experience the midwives generally are the nicest ones and least likely to even bat an eye at a high BMI but they will potentially have to refer you to a consultant depending on what your BMI is. I think it’s something like if it’s over 30, then you just have the glucose test, if it’s over 35 it’s glucose test + consultant led care and extra growth scan, over 40 then as above but 2 extra scans and then if above 50 then as above but you will also need to meet with an anaesthetist to be assessed in case you need an epidural etc.

Each NHS trust does things differently but generally the higher your BMI the more people you have poking their nose in 😂

BikeTyson Wed 09-Sep-20 09:01:36

Mine was 31 at booking in and hardly mentioned. I had to have an extra appointment with a specialist midwife (who incidentally was way fatter than me) with really obvious diet advice, so that was a bit pointless but might have been useful for someone. I was prescribed extra vitamin D. I had to have the glucose tolerance test. I was told if my BMI was over 35 (or it might have been 40?) I wouldn’t be able to use the midwife led unit for birth but that wasn’t an option for me anyway due to being high risk for another reason.

There was certainly no shaming or blaming and while my weight did influence my care it wasn’t in a negative way.

SpunBodgeSquarepants Wed 09-Sep-20 09:12:31

Hello! Honestly don't worry about it! My bmi is 45 and I'm currently 17 weeks pregnant, only time my weight has even been mentioned is when my midwife said to me last week 'Oh, you're under the consultant because you've had a previous c-section and your weight'. I automatically pull my belly up for scans/doppler so it saves the embarrassment of having to be asked. At the end of the day, a midwife/doctor/consultant can be as rude to me as they like - I've tried for this baby for over 5 years and I'm just happy it's all going well.

DontFadeAway Wed 09-Sep-20 09:13:06

@Gigitree thank you so much for your kind words! And congratulations on your gorgeous little girl! My BMI is around 38, I've lost nearly 6 stone so far this year so I think I'm going to go in with that, I'm just fearful of being judged!! Fingers crossed I get a lovely midwife!xx

OP’s posts: |
firsttimemumhere Wed 09-Sep-20 09:16:47

I was 36 with a very high BMI, it wasn't ever realy mentioned, speak to the Dr or midwife asap to get the 5mg of folic acid and you will probably be consultant led but other than a couple of extra hospital appointments and scans it was fine, even with developing gestational diabetes. Congratulations 👏

User3627290 Wed 09-Sep-20 09:48:56

I have a high BMI and my midwife has been lovely. I expressed my concerns about it at the start and she was so reassuring - she was very quick to point out that most overweight and obese women have totally healthy pregnancies, and even where there is a higher risk of some complications these can be identified and managed very easily. She was also very positive about the possibility of a home birth for me.

I was also worried it might interfere with my scans or make them difficult but it didn’t at all, and the sonographers were really respectful and kind to me.

I was so worried about this but I couldn’t have received more exemplary care.

DontFadeAway Wed 09-Sep-20 11:13:19

@User3627290 thank you so much for that, that's really reassuring! I'm trying not to worry so much but I'm struggling to sleep. Will speak to the midwife about extra folic acid and I know that slimming world is safe to follow during pregnancy so I may continue with that, not to lose weight but to try not to gain more than I need!

Again, thank you ♥️

OP’s posts: |
Hrcg87 Wed 09-Sep-20 11:17:24

Hi

Honestly like most have said dont worry about it, my midwife mentioned my BMI in passing, they know you know that your overweight. They just said they will do GTT and extra growth scans at 32, 35, and 38 weeks to check everythings ok for me. Not been lectured or given any other guidance apart from to watch how much sugar i'm eating as family history of GTT.

MariaDingbat Wed 09-Sep-20 11:28:24

Congratulations!

My BMI was 35 when I got pregnant and not one Dr or midwife has mentioned my weight so far. I was on the higher strength folic acid and I'm taking 75mg aspirin daily, plus I've just done my diabetes glucose test. But there were two other ladies in the waiting room doing the glucose test who were quite slim so family history, age and personal risk factors are all taken into account, not just your weight.

The only thing that has turned up relating to my weight is that it took a bit longer to get good images at the 20 week scan which the report said was due to 'maternal habitas'. I think it's a polite way of saying my tummy was in the way!

I've only put on 5lbs so far at 27 weeks so I mentioned that to my consultant and he said they don't even weigh people after booking anymore as it doesn't really give them any useful info. As long as you ready healthy enough and get some walks in, they're happy. Good luck!!

belle365 Wed 09-Sep-20 12:40:11

My bmi was 37 at booking appointment, like others have said my midwife has barely mentioned it. All of my scans have been ok, i had a private scan at 16 weeks and i was able to find out the sex of my baby no problem.

I had a telephone appointment with a senior midwife and she told me not to eat white bread - not sure that will solve my obesity problem grin but she was very nice.

I’ve not been very active but going to try and get back to swimming this week. I’m 18 weeks now and i’ve not gained any weight yet. You will be fine smile

yoomoo Wed 09-Sep-20 13:49:18

I have a high BMI (calculated as 44 at my booking appointment) and I’ve not had any issues at all, now 16 weeks. I said to my midwife upfront that I knew my weight was too high and that I was healthy eating to ensure I stay the same throughout pregnancy, due to eating better and food aversions I’ve actually lost a stone so far so happy with that. It’s not advised to lose weight really but I guess it will mean I can stay roughly the same. I was immediately referred to a consultant but I also have a back issue meaning I need a c-section so I think the conversation will be more about the back problem.
I’ve never felt judged at all, midwife just said I needed to take 150mg of aspirin from 12 weeks as I’d be higher risk of pre-eclampsia and I will have more scans/monitoring but that’s fine with me. Oh and think I have to have extra diabetes checks and BP monitoring.
My midwife also said (in my trust anyway) that they don’t weigh ladies anymore during pregnancy and just trust us to monitor things. I’m trying not to be stressed about it. Rightly or wrongly with my BMI if I can stay the same then I’ll be better off when baby is born than someone with a healthy BMI who gains 5 stone!
It has annoyed me slightly the assumptions that get made, I’m kind of enjoying proving them wrong though and having low blood pressure etc grin
Enjoy your pregnancy, congratulations smile

PowPurry Wed 09-Sep-20 14:08:38

BMI of about 37-38 previous pregnancies and it was 34 at this ones booking appointment.
I think it’s 35 and over for consultant led care. Which basically just means extra appointments and possibly extra scans (I did with all my previous pregnancies).
My pregnancies have been perfect, bar my BP going up at the end with DC2. My births have all been wonderful and straightforward. In fact I’m swaying towards having this one at home.
No one has spoken to me about my weight in a patronising way in four pregnancies.

Our bodies are designed for this, fat or not.

LikeSilentRaindrops Wed 09-Sep-20 14:26:10

Agree with everything that’s been said here - first pregnancy my bmi was 27 ish and it’s gone up with each subsequent one (now on number 3). I haven’t received any different or negative treatment, everybody is very matter of fact. The only thing to add is that my midwife said I would be contacted at 37 weeks (I think) to see if I would want an induction - apparently the guidelines are changing / will be changed by my due date to recommend you have an induction at 39 weeks if your bmi is over 30. Might be something worth asking the midwife about and making sure you feel informed enough to make the decision to induce or not. Good luck and congrats!

DontFadeAway Wed 09-Sep-20 17:12:20

Thank you all so much. These comments have really started to help to put my mind to rest. I'm going to phone the GP Friday and make the first contact to let them know I'm expecting, I'll be 4w+5.

Anxiety is a horrible thing, but I can't thank you all enough for your positive stories xx

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