My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Get updates on how your baby develops, your body changes, and what you can expect during each week of your pregnancy by signing up to the Mumsnet Pregnancy Newsletters.

Pregnancy

When did you announce?

28 replies

firsttimemummyxxxxx · 02/09/2020 08:10

I’m trying to decide when is best to announce my pregnancy... I’ve been thinking 12 weeks after I’ve had my scan. At the 12 week scan I know there is the screenings, do you find out there and then if something is wrong? (Sorry, this is my first pregnancy!) x

OP posts:
Report
Thegirlhasnoname · 02/09/2020 08:12

You won’t find out at the scan the results of the screenings. They might say that the Nuchal measurement looks okay but they can’t give a proper answer until the blood work comes back (can take a couple of weeks).

With my first we let people know at 15 weeks once screening results came back and I’m currently 17 weeks with no plans on telling people yet!

Report
Sexnotgender · 02/09/2020 08:17

At least 12 weeks.

My parents know but that is all. Will let the rest of the family know after scan at 12 weeks. Unfortunately I won’t be able to go to my brothers wedding as I’m due the day after so really need to let him know ASAP.

Beyond family, I’ll just let people know as and when I see them. I don’t really do ‘announcements’.

Report
BeMorePacific · 02/09/2020 08:17

I told immediate family and close friends at 12 weeks. Then everyone else after the 20week scan.
There is no right way to do it though. Congratulations on your pregnancy xx

Report
OverTheRainbow88 · 02/09/2020 08:18

I told family and friends straight away really as if something went wrong I would have told them anyway.

Report
BabyG123 · 02/09/2020 08:23

I think it's down to personal preference

Some wait until the first scan

Some all test results

Some straight away

Maybe consider IF something was to be wrong or go wrong, who would you use as a support? Therefore they'd find out anyway.

Report
mummy2myJJ · 02/09/2020 08:27

It's such a personal decision. I told my family and close friends when I found out Incase anything were to go wrong they would be there to support me and can be sensitive around the subject x

Report
scrivette · 02/09/2020 08:29

Apart from our parents I told everyone after the 12 week scan.

Report
Frazzled2207 · 02/09/2020 08:30

I’m really not keen on the “announcement” thing though I gather many are. I told parents after a private 8ish week scan and work and other people much later when I was showing.

Report
Lowprofilename · 02/09/2020 08:34

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ for privacy reasons.

majesticallyawkward · 02/09/2020 08:45

I waited until after the 12 week scans with both to tell anyone other than my mum. Outside of close family and friends anyone else started being told from 24 weeks.

I think 'announcing' is a bit cringe though, if I am close enough to see or talk to the person then either I'll tell them or they'd notice.

Report
ragged · 02/09/2020 08:46

I delayed telling one employer partly because of maternity leave implications. Otherwise, I don't remember announcing, but did tell anyone I felt like telling Straight away - no regrets. Would do same again (God forbid I get pg at my age, though).

How would you feel if you had to tell people you had a miscarriage -- which are not uncommon before 13-14 weeks. If you don't want to run that risk (I didn't want to feel so vulnerable with one of my bosses), better to wait or be selective about who knows. With final DC I only told people on need to know basis, didn't feel inspired to overshare. Until 7-8m, lots of people thought I was just getting fat!

Report
niki26 · 02/09/2020 09:36

It's very personal - do what is right for you. I remember my husband saying 'we aren't allowed to tell anyone until the 12 week scan' and I corrected him.....of course we are 'allowed'. Many people just choose not to.

In my case, due to being 13 weeks when we went into lock down I haven't really announced anything and I'm 38 weeks now! Told immediate family between 8-24 weeks but I assume people we don't speak to often generally don't know!

Report
Frazzled2207 · 02/09/2020 09:40

Ps 12 week scan does not tell you much at all other that there is a baby growing and is the right size (hopefully). At the 20 week scan they look at lots of things in detail and far more likely to know if baby looking healthy or not.

Report
Turtleturtle81 · 02/09/2020 09:42

I waited until around 23 weeks to tell people after my 20 week scan confirmed everything was okay with the baby.

Report
HM1984 · 02/09/2020 10:02

Usually people wait for 12 weeks as its the end of the first trimester. You won't necessarily start showing anytime soon (my bump started to grow after 4.5 months). I guess its really up to you as opposed to the normal timings as there isn't such a thing. Whatever makes you feel comfortable

Report
cherrypiepie · 02/09/2020 10:16

Congratulations op! It depends on what you feel like. I told a few early on which is helpful if you need som help which I I did. But I personally would hold out until at least 20 weeks to 'go public'. Total personal choice though. I think the '12 week rule' is a bit odd and would tell various people at different stages. I've had a few miscarriages with changes your judgement on these things and every situation is different.

Report
JanQi · 02/09/2020 10:20

I'm 5+1 and we've told a few people already - our parents and a few close friends. I completely understand people waiting but this is the biggest thing that's ever happened to me and I want to share it with people. I have anxiety so being able to talk about my worries is really important and I want people to know if something goes wrong.

If I get bad sickness I will probably tell my boss before 12 weeks just so she knows what's going on and gives me more flexibility. We have a good relationship and I know she would be supportive.

We aren't planning on telling "the world" until after the scan but I'm undecided on whether we'll do an actual announcement or just tell people in person.

Report
Mummyinlove09 · 02/09/2020 10:46

We are pregnant with our first and we waited until the 12 week scan to tell anyone. It was a long 9 weeks (as we found out straight away!) but it meant we could enjoy the excitement just the two of us for a while which was so lovely and it was quite fun/funny trying to keep it a secret from everyone! But more importantly, we wanted to be sure everything was ok at the scan. And finally, it meant we could share the news on Mother’s Day due to how the timing worked out Smile so it was a lovely Mother’s Day present for both of our Mum’s!

Report
FluffyKittensinabasket · 02/09/2020 10:50

As soon as I knew! I’ve been feeling very sick so it’s hard to hide from family, friends and work.

I’ve had an early scan and baby is viable. Still a long way to go but we had a loss I would be telling family and friends anyway and work would know because I would be off sick.

Report
unmarkedbythat · 02/09/2020 10:51

Everyone guessed at work long before I formally announced with the first two, mostly because I was constantly vomiting. With the third, I didn't know myself for quite some time and I didn't get any real symptoms early on, plus I was in probation with a rather cunty employer and had no intention of letting them know until I has passed that!

Report
TruffleMama · 02/09/2020 11:05

Mother and mother-in-law - told them the day I found out I was pregnant.

Close friends and the rest of my family - after the 12w scan (we had also had a Harmony test done at 10wks)

Announcement on social media - after my 20w scan

Report
Superscientist · 02/09/2020 11:24

I told work straight away at 4-5 weeks for healthy and safety reasons which worked out well as I needed time off for pregnancy sickness and appointments in the first trimester.
We told my partners family at 16 weeks, my family at 17 weeks. I told some work colleagues between 13 and 16 weeks depending on whether it came up naturally and made an announcement when we were sent to work from home and only to say "bye BTW you probably won't see me until 2021" half joking who knew it would be true!
We told some close friends at the 20 week scan and everyone else just as it came up

Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

Allgirlmum · 02/09/2020 11:49

I told several people last month to only go on to miscarry I’m now pregnant again and not telling anyone until 25-30 weeks or possibly after the birth I kept my last a secret till birth

Report
Dinosaursdontgrowontrees · 02/09/2020 11:58

I’m currently 14weeks pregnant with my 3rd I told a couple of close friend straight away. I told a few more people after the scan but lots of people still don’t know, it’s a personal thing, no right or wrong answer so what ever feels right for you.
To answer your question about the scan they tell you if all looks ok at the scan then you have a blood test to get a clearer result. I got my blood test results back within 5 days.

Report
ChanklyBore · 02/09/2020 12:02

I’ve had several pregnancies. Sometimes I’ve stated mentioning it as soon as I knew myself at 4-5 weeks. Sometimes I’ve waited until 24 weeks plus. Very much dependent on the circumstances of my pregnancy, when I was expecting it to end, and who I was talking to.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.