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He blocked me, he said my pregnancy will upset his ex and his 2 children

(16 Posts)
Jaysmum2009 Sun 14-Jun-20 21:08:20

Such a long story. Years iv liked this guy, he lives in the same town as me. He split from his girlfriend around a year or so ago, they have 2 children together. She was a serial cheat. He even caught her in bed with someone else, but he still stayed with her. Finally she left him and he moved back in with his mum. She is a very poisonous bit.h. So one day I bumped into him and he asked for my number, I was so excited. When I got home the texting began, usual chit chat. Few days went past and we Spoke on the phone. Then I started to see red flags when he began to talk about his ex (for 4 hours straight) I even know what colour underwear she wears on a Thursday. I kinda just let it go. Few weeks pass and he is still talking about her. He came to my house and we had a drink and a really good night. I started seeing him of an eavining and it was so exciting. He used to work throughout the day and then he would have his kids till the eavining. It started to get to me when his phone would constantly ping and it would be her, she would be trying to ring him constantly. Sending him pics of the kids, remember she is seeing someone else. He would still constantly talk about her, after I stressed that it was effecting me he got the hump and left my house (also called me her name) cut a long stort short. I found out I was pregnant and he was so angry and disappointed. He said that I don’t it deliberately, and his ex and kids would be so upset, I was to have an abortion. That night his ex turned up at my house and we had a fight on the doorstep, she was shouting, saying that I need to look through his messages to her. After she left I did, and might I say I thought my heart was going to explode. He was calling her babe, messaging her more than he messages me, leaving more kisses, they were really talking about personal things. Currently now I’m on my own with my thoughts, he hasn’t checked in on me to see if I’m ok and he has blocked me. Let me just add, I’m 100x hotter than his ex, I have a successful caree and my own house, his ex has never worked a day in her life and has a reputation of sleeping around. See I’m comparing myself but this is what iv been reduced to. I feel so depressed and along. Please girls help me out hear and tell me what to do x

OP’s posts: |
GemSmith738 Sun 14-Jun-20 21:21:57

Oh sorry sorry to hear this OP. He sounds like he's not worth your time, you can do so much better! It's totally up to you regarding your pregnancy, whatever you decide I'm sure you will be strong. Do you have any other support around you?

Brenna24 Sun 14-Jun-20 21:23:11

Write him off as a lost cause and get on with your life. He will be due you maintenance for the baby but don't expect him to be an involved father. If he does end up being it will be a bonus but if he isn't and you has expectations he would be, you will be crushed.

CloudyVanilla Sun 14-Jun-20 21:29:13

I'm so sorry you have become pregnant by him sad

It's not a good position you are in I'll be honest, he's hung up on someone else and you can be damn sure that she's still interested in him, and even if that was waning and realistically they shouldn't get back together, the "want what you can't have" syndrome will kick in for her and she will double down on him now.

The only thing might be you being pregnant might cause her to dump him. But I wouldn't want to be someone's second choice, it sounds like an unhappy and rocky start to a relationship and I feel like you could save yourself so much grief by avoiding him altogether, even though I know that will be so hard flowers

Jkslays Sun 14-Jun-20 21:31:16

Your so much better than her yet he still couldn’t get over her..

Take responsibility for your own actions in this. You started shagging a bloke unprotected who was still obsessed and in love with another woman. What did you expect to happen?

You’ve made your bed now lie in it, meanwhile through this fucked up relationship your now carrying his baby and he doesn’t want to know you. So rather than pulling her to bits you need to sort your own shit out.

LovingLola Sun 14-Jun-20 21:34:21

It’s the children I feel sorry for.

TheArtfulScreamer1 Sun 14-Jun-20 21:36:07

He couldn't care less about you. Unfortunately you were a stop gap whilst he mooned over his ex hoping she'd take him back. If you want this baby prepare to go it alone. I know I'm being harsh but I wouldn't count on this man at all.

GalwayGrowl Sun 14-Jun-20 21:38:13

Personally I would have a termination and cut all ties with them. I wouldn't want to condemn a future child to a life of that crap.

AnneLovesGilbert Sun 14-Jun-20 21:39:25

Don’t waste your time comparing, competing or slagging her off. You knew he was still involved with her when you started seeing him. By accepting how he spoke about her and how hung up on her he was you showed him what you were worth and what you’d put up with.

If you want to be a single mum then hopefully you have a support network. He’s gone. His priorities are his “ex” and his children and I doubt that will change. At least you’re successful and have a nice house, your beauty probably won’t help but financial stability is good. Good luck.

Honeyroar Sun 14-Jun-20 21:40:19

There were red flags flapping everywhere with this bloke. Blocking you was probably the best thing he ever did for you. It’s just a shame that you’re already pregnant. This guy is never going to be what you want him to be. You’re probably going to be a single parent with this baby. Make your own plans for the baby and what you’re going to do. It’s not going to be easy dealing with him and his ex. Sorry if that sounds tough, but it’s more than likely the way it is. ☹️

Bluntness100 Sun 14-Jun-20 21:44:04

Are you willing to be a single parent op? This is the question, do you wish to go it alone or terminate, that’s the decision you need t9 make.

As for him, he was just in it for the sex. He is not willing to have a proper relationship with you or raise a child with you. His wife and him are unfinished business. Irrelevant of your views of her.

You need to focus on your pregnancy and make some decisions.

Quackersandcheese3 Sun 14-Jun-20 21:44:52

Why would you have unprotected sex with a guy in the situation you described?!

You also sound very immature “ called her babe” , “ I’m 100% hotter.”

Guess you will have to deal with the consequences yourself , good luck .

Wilberforce1 Sun 14-Jun-20 22:05:41

How old are you? You're post makes you sound like a teenager and I feel sorry for all of the kids involved including your unborn one. Maybe consider not having the baby and moving on with your life.

Bekka94 Sun 14-Jun-20 22:23:03

Some very mixed opinions on this post!

You've clearly been used as a rebound and merely something nice to look at while he got his leg over.. contraception should of been used but that's not just your responsibility OP he should know that unprotected sex causes pregnancy 🤦‍♀️

You should of ran a mile when he was giving you red flags not flowers so this situation has been created by your stupidity and naivety.

On the other hand theres now a baby involved you have essentially 2 options get rid of it and move on from him and this situation but that has to be your decision not Influenced by others

Or you accept your gonna be a single parent embrace it and put your baby first not sit and hope that he'll come running back to you and everything will be amazing because let's be honest that isn't gonna happen.

AnneLovesGilbert Sun 14-Jun-20 23:22:18

How far along are you now?

sel2223 Sun 14-Jun-20 23:36:33

'She is a very poisonous bit.h'

'I started seeing him of an eavining and it was so exciting'

'That night his ex turned up at my house and we had a fight on the doorstep'

'He was calling her babe, messaging her more than he messages me, leaving more kisses'

'he hasn’t checked in on me to see if I’m ok and he has blocked me'

'I’m 100x hotter than his ex'

Dear me OP. I honestly do not want to sound patronising or harsh or anything like that when you're obviously going through a difficult time but you really need to read this back to yourself in the cold light of day. It's like reading a teenagers diary.

Ask yourself, is this a mature, stable situation in which to bring a child into? Are you prepared/able to do this alone? Do you have support around you?

Good luck.

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