Thread for us classed as mature pregnant ladies

[Sheera1]

Hi all. I wasn't wanted to hijack any threads on hear with specific questions, but wondered if anyone fancied a chat thread for us classed as mature mums to be? Anyone who feels they fit in that box are welcome to join.

I will start. 🌞

I am 41. I have a 10 year old ds and one mmc 3 yrs ago. New partner is reason for the gap.

I was very shocked when I found out as we had assumed that ship had sailed as no joy since mmc. Head was in that camp and was quite a shock to come out of it.

I am 13 weeks based on my scan later Friday. Awaiting NIPT results hopefully today or tomorrow. Been cautious after mmc but hard to not get so attached as the weeks go by.

My first purchase if all ok will be a pregnancy pillow.

Honestly I feel massive already. I am very overweight but was with ds and had a perfect fuss free pregnancy. This time I am so 🤢 and tired and feel just ill from 4pm onwards.

Instead of it easing up, last night I was still feeling 🤢 trying to sleep and was very uncomfortable due to feeling like my womb is massive.

Anyone else feeling like this? Goodness knows how I will be weeks from now. Eeek.

[Frazzlerock]

Hey @sheera1 I'd love to join you! How are you doing?

You know my story but, for the benefit of others:

I've 2 DC from previous marriage - 11 and 14years old and I'm 40 years old. We've had 3 MMC and 1 MC over the past 4 years. We were 100% convinced we lost this one at 7 weeks after a huge bleed and clots but a scan several days later showed a little baby and a heartbeat, to our complete surprise!
I'm currently a week behind Sheera at 12 weeks (+1 day) and my bump is ridiculous already, assuming it's because this one is my 7th pregnancy. I feel like I'm waddling already.

We have also just had NIPT/Harmony test and awaiting results.

Symptoms so far:
EXHAUSTION! - need a two hour nap every day
Craving Franks Red Hot sauce (on everything)
And rather large and tender boobs - usually tiny little things so I feel like I've had the boob job I always wanted

Sheera, I bought my preg pillow and its amazing. I got this one after a recommendation on MN: www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B07QD2DQSJ/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o01_s00?psc=1&ie=UTF8&tag=mumsnet&ascsubtag=mnforum-21

[Liveforholidays]

Hi! I'm just 40 (was 40 on Tuesday!!) and I'm 38 weeks today, second son due 1st June (1st son is now 7). I didn't have NIPT as didn't know it existed. Wish I did as I had a very traumatic high risk combined screening. I then had low risk Nipt. I didn't really feel old but the only reason I'm being induced is because of my age.. 🙄

[sunlight81]

Hi all!!!

I have 3DC - DD17 DSD13 DS1 and one on the way!!

I'm will be 39 when I have my little bubba and this will definitely be the last. I'm too old for sleepless nights

[DufferedUp]

Hi,

I'm 42 and have 15 yr old twins from a previous relationship. Currently 25 weeks with #3 and due a week before I turn 43. All IVF babies.

[Frazzlerock]

@Liveforholidays I didn't know they induced because of age.
I expect I'll be having a c-section as my 2 DC were. I'm not sure if I'm brave enough to give birth naturally if I had the choice! Especially as DC1 got stuck and I ended up having an emergency c-section. My elective with a breech DC2 was a breeze

[Sheera1]

@Frazzlerock oh so pleased you have joined this. I am thinking about you daily! I hadn't thought of that, so this is actually my 3rd pregnancy (3rd time getting to 12 weeks anyway). I am glad it is not just me who feels massive already. I will definitely take a look at that pillow and get ordering. Was so uncomfortable last night.

Oh and I forgot to add headaches. Having them a lot. Boo.

@sunlight81 oh that is lovely that you have two older children and then the two younger will grow up together too. Hope the older kids can lend a hand. I am hoping my 10 yr old ds will a bit 🙈. When are you due?

@Liveforholidays oh you are so nearly there. That is so exciting. How has your pregnancy been other than screening trauma? That sounds so stressful and so pleased you got a lower risk result. I hadn't heard of NIPT either till I read it on here. Wishing they would call me!! So impatient. 😀

I will be a planned section after very messy first birth. It is what I wanted but they said that was their recommendation anyway. And yes they are taking me early too at 39 weeks (fingers crossed all well).

I hated my clinic appointment. The consultant was perfectly nice but so clinical and the number of times she said "because of your age" "because of your weight". Stressed me out a little tbh.

I have to take aspirin 150mg from now till birth and have to get klexane injections from 28 week. Due to hitting some moderate pre-eclampsia indicators e.g. age, weight 😭😭, and 10 yrs since last birth.

[Sheera1]

@DufferedUp hello!!! Oh that is lovely news for you and lovely positive IVF story too. Are the twins really excited?? How have you been keeping?

@Frazzlerock yes I was pleased c section was on the table instantly. I had a failed induction (on the drip for 7 hours and went from 1cm dilated to 0.5cm! 😭). Ds had fetal distress which they mentioned twice at my consultant meeting the other day but told me none of it at the time! Cord was wrapped and I swear my body just knew not to deliver him normally and refused. Lol. Have a massive messy long lightning like scar but I am not bothered about it.

[sunlight81]

DD17 has been great for childcare during lockdown but was really interested before then. To be honest I was ok with that as I would like to avoid any surprise pregnancies over the next 5years!

DSD13 has been a god send and is super helpful. She will watch him and play with him so I can grab a bath etc. She is a bit of a helicopter sibling though and constantly say "no don't do that" "stop that" "no". I struggle with it as that approach really isn't my style. I let him explore, pick bits up off the carpet, chew on a bit of cardboard (within reason) as I'm a firm believer that kids learn by doing. DS is a great problem solver and even at 1 likes to see how things work!!

I had a terrible 1st birth so went CSection for the second. It was amazingly easy so going CSection for third. Also contemplating getting sterilised at the same time

[DufferedUp]

DC aren't overly bothered that I can tell! I've had a horrendous pregnancy so far with morning sickness that won't end. Still being sick random mornings although since 21 weeks it's improved a lot and I no longer have to eat bland things for dinner. My hips ache, my back aches and I'm exhausted all the time but I guess that's age for you.

I've been told I won't go over my due date and they'll induce if necessary as the risk of still birth increases for us oldies once you reach 40 wks.

[Mucklowe]

Hello!

I'm 39 and 25 weeks pregnant with my first - a girl, due late August.

[choccaramel]

Hi everyone
I'm 39, 3 Dc 18, 16, 12 and currently 15 weeks pregnant. My only complaint is constant blocked nose and a migraine every other day.
I have been told there is a 1-15 chance baby has downs syndrome. But we as a family have decided what will be will be x

[kirstygw]

@Frazzlerock What was the cause of bleeding?

I’m 11 weeks and bleeding has got worse over last 2 days, from spotting light pink yesterday to brighter blood now and even turned toilet water red when I went to the toilet. I’m having a scan tomorrow in ebu!

[Goldenmother]

Hi
I'll be 39 when baby arrives in 5 weeks have 2DC already 16 and 14 had a miscarriage 7 years ago and tried to convince the first year after MC nothing happen found out I had PCOS so gave up and was happy and greatful for 2 I have then in October last year got a big shocked took a few days to sink but very happy and excited

[sunlight81]

@choccaramel are u tempted to go for a harmony test? I believe they are a lot more accurate than NHS screening x

[choccaramel]

No, I can't change what it is. And to us it will be loved whatever. Will hopefully know a bit more when I have my 20 week scan in June. But what will be will be x

[Liveforholidays]

@choccaramel I had 1 in 13 chance of downs syndrome! Our age has so much to do with it. NIPT came back low risk. I wouldn't bother with NHS screening again.
@Goldenmother congratulations!! Not long to go now. I bet you were so shocked to find you were pregnant, what great newss.

[Liveforholidays]

@DufferedUp I was told I wouldn't go over 40 weeks because your placenta can start to break down early once you reach the age of 40. I'm booked for an induction on 1st June but spoke to a midwife yesterday that I don't have to have it, especially as my placenta looks healthy on my 38 week scan, and I was only 40 on 12th May! I'm going to have regular sweeps over the next couple of weeks to try and prepare my body as I had an awful induction with DS1. Fingers crossed this delivery is not so traumatic.

[V1ckyCh1ck]

Hi all, 40 years young and currently 37 weeks with our first. Super excited when we found out and have had a very straight forward pregnancy. Low risk of downs and all scans/tests have been good. However went for our 36 week scan which showed baby's long bones are measuring short (below 5th percentile). This then throws up a number of outcomes which has knocked me sideways! Just praying baby is small. Going back for a scan next week and no doubt will be booked in for an induction. Not a lot we can do now just trying to stay positive.

[sunlight81]

@choccaramel it wouldn't change my mind as I've already fallen in love with my little bubba however I'm a massive planner/preppier. I feel I can tackle anything if I have time to make a plan of action and make sure both me and the family are prepared for what's to come.

@Liveforholidays don't let them pressure you into anything - if u don't want an induction u really can go over. I think they give u more checks though (daily?) to make sure ur both doing

I'm only 7.5weeks so apart from the horrific tiredness some days I don't actually feel pregnant.. looking forward to a kicking bump!!

[Goldenmother]

@Liveforholidays thank you yes was a shocked to start with but so excited for baby's arrival. Conveyor you also

[Snapper81]

Hi ladies, please can I join? I've just turned 39 and I'm 8 weeks pregnant. I had my DD when I was 36 and back then my age was never mentioned. I've got my booking in appointment next week so I'll be interested to hear if things are different now that I'm 3 years older.
I had a MMC in February so I'm still very nervous about this pregnancy and we're waiting for the 12 week scan to announce (though I had a private scan 2 weeks ago and saw a strong heartbeat ).
I'm having every symptom going so, although I feel utterly rubbish, I'm happy to be so laiden with symptoms if it means things are progressing well.

[stairgates]

43 and expecting here too, little blue one, 29 weeks :) looking forward to having delivery out of the way in a few months.

[Frazzlerock]

Hey, sorry been a bit AWOL.

Headaches - oh man, yes. Awful!

@kirstygw my bleed is from a subchorionic haematoma. It was pretty horrendous and I never knew a baby could survive that amount of blood loss but here I am 5 weeks later, and still bleeding sporadically but only a little. What time is your scan?

I'm just back from our 12 week scan and have had our EDD brought forward by 3 days which is a nice surprise

[Sheera1]

Welcome to all joiners.

So exciting for those of you nearing the end if this journey and look forward to your advice for those of us with a ways to go.

@choccaramel that is a wonderful attitude to have. My ds is autistic and I wouldn't change him for the world. School has been utterly traumatic for him and a very stressful fight for me but wee mum's seem to have unlimitless fortitude when it comes to our children. He is 10 tomorrow and we had all but decided to home educate and getting a wee trial now with lockdown. He is so much happier and his mental health is the most important thing. Honestly I know I am very very biased but he is just the sweetest, most loving, nicest wee boy. I believe autism is genetic so there is a chance with this bubba although it is a different dad but what will be will be.

I get my NIPT results today apparently and had the most awful dreams about it where she said the reason I have been so ill is that my baby is a very I'll. Woke up in tears and my heart pounding.

[Sheera1]

Ugh. Just had call on NIPT and not enough fetal blood to get a result. They have a 2nd sample but as it was taken at the same time it is unlikely to have any more. Find out on Friday Looks like I will need to go back and give another sample and wait another 2 weeks.

I just feel I can't tell people till I know. As I have one disabled child, which I would not change for the world, but I don't think I could knowingly have a child with something like downs and have the capacity for that. I worry even with a neuro typical child how I will balance ds needs and a second child. He is so dependent on me.

I just wanted a bit of peace of mind as not had any so far and be able to hopefully enjoy and look forward to the future.

Also being weeks further along will be so much more traumatic to not proceed.

Sorry for the pity party today. Feeling a bit down. Xx