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Pregnancy

dummys good idea? or bad?

36 replies

kittenbaby · 16/08/2007 15:57

just wondered on your views ?
and is using one than stopping linked with sids ?

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PrettyCandles · 16/08/2007 16:00

IMO (and, partly, IME too) dummies are only bad if the baby is allowed to sleep with one in their mouth, or if the LO is encouraged to use it all the time (in which case it shuts them up). As a soother in time of need it is brilliant.

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Mumpbump · 16/08/2007 16:01

I think it depends on your baby. Ds never really needed one. He had a couple of whingey spells where I thought I'd get him one, but by the time I got around to going to the shops, he would be more settled.

I think there is evidence that they reduce the risk of SIDS as I seem to remember my NCT antenatal class teacher saying that they maintained an air passage, so the baby couldn't get smothered, but not sure of any reports backing that up.

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hayley2u · 16/08/2007 16:21

i used one with my ds and will use one with baby 2 , if and when she needs it. i gave one to ds as he was in an incubator and got pretty distressed so it was a comfort to him.
i dont think they do harm unless you let them have them all day everyday just for sake of it, it makes there teeth stick out apparantly and when older slows their speach down.i dont mind for bed time though as long as they are settled and happy that main thing

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RGPargy · 16/08/2007 16:25

Same as hayley2u. My DS was in an incubator too and the nurses actually first introduced it to him to help with his sucking (much to my ). However it was a life saver and i fully intend to use one when my daughter is born too.

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MaloryTowersHasManners · 16/08/2007 16:26

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ProfYaffle · 16/08/2007 16:28

Sometimes you don't have a choice - DD1 refused a dummy point blank, dd2 only had one for a week or so before refusing it as well.

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derah · 16/08/2007 16:38

I think they can be a wonderful help, as long as you don't let LO get too dependent. Nothing grates me more than seeing a happy 3yo in Sainsbury's with a dummy in their mouth!! If you use one ONLY when little one is upset and crying, they're great. We never let DD go to bed with hers cos we didn't want her to need it to fall asleep. But if she wakes up in the night we give it to her. I started giving her one in the night when she was a couple of months old and figured her night wakes were more about comfort than being hungry. Then we started to let her have it during the day if she got grumpy, but took it out as soon as she was settled.

Now she's 2, and only has her dummy a couple of times in a week if she wakes up during the night, and never has it during the day. I like to think we've used dummies in a sensible way - very helpful to soothe DD but she's never got too dependent on it and has never had one in her mouth just for the sake of it. Like so many things in life, it's all about finding the right balance!

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mammaduck · 16/08/2007 16:41

I THINK (please jump in if you know better) the dummies reducing SIDS thing is referring to American research, but in USA apparently mothers are still advised to put babies to sleep on their tummies.

I have no experience of them as my LO found his thumb at 2 months and we were all happy with that instead of a dummy.

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MarkingFental · 16/08/2007 16:43

Agree with Malory.

You can also shove one in each ear whilst you rock a screaming baby, if the baby won't take one.

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flowerybeanbag · 16/08/2007 16:47

rofl @ marking fental

DS has one, but we only use it if he has worked himself into a frenzy and needs calming down, or if he gets overtired and struggles against sleep. He is bottlefed so doesn't get any comfort suck from anywhere else.

I find it a shame when some babies have it in as a matter of course, whether they need it or not, just in all the time for no apparent reason.

And don't get me started on toddlers running round with them...good grief.

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mixedmama · 16/08/2007 16:54

My DS has one but again on when extremely tired and fighting it and refusing to settle and comes straight out once asleep. never take it out with me during the day as i hate other people seeing him with dummy in his mouth.

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Gemy · 16/08/2007 20:45

Offered one to DD and I half regret it/half don't. She only had it at nap time and never at any other time. After she falls asleep it falls out and stays out until morning (when she retrieves it and sucks on it again). She always had been a very good sleeper and has been settling herself back to sleep since 3 months and I'm sure that part of this credit must be due to the dummy (and the 'Baby Whisperer' no doubt)

But, I do sometimes wish I'd not have made it part of her naptime/bedtime routine because I wonder at what stage we can start to take steps to remove it. I imagine her having it when she's 5 or something!

With this baby, on the scan she was sucking her thumb, so I guess we won't have to worry with this one.

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Idobelieveinfairies · 16/08/2007 20:57

ohhh dummies are great inventions when baby takes them. 4 out of 8 of mine had them and they were calmer children for it! none have/had sticky out teeth or speech problems but that might be becasue they didn't have them all the time, we only used them for sleeping.


My sister who had her baby a few months before my oldest was against dummies, her DD sucked her thumb instead and still does today aged 14....i would prefer to be able to take the dummy away. Some babies don't need that sucking comfort at all, so it all depends. Do what is easiest for you.

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modsaluk · 16/08/2007 21:04

My DS is 22 months and has his dummy for when his is really upset or for bedtime. He also has a comfort teddy. In a way i wish he never had his dummy as getting him out of the routine is going to be a nightmare. Does anyone have any suggestions for losing the dummy at this age, we thought Father Christmas could take it away.

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Idobelieveinfairies · 16/08/2007 21:08

My oldest daughter started popping hers with her teeth so they went in the bin and we were 'going into town in the morning to buy a new one'..but the next day we forgot so when it was bed time again we said the same thing...the 3rd night nothing was mentioned.

DS was never really bothered about his, so it was no problem.

[cough] my 2.10 twins still have theirs for sleeping ...

When you have 8 children sometimes you have to give in to these things..just to get a peaceful evening!

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Idobelieveinfairies · 16/08/2007 21:10

oh...forgot to add (because of the blushing)....father christmas is a great idea...i will be trying that one too if they still have theirs by then!

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sleepycat · 16/08/2007 21:13

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tori32 · 16/08/2007 21:14

Great invention to settle sucky babies. Helping to soothe them to sleep. Hate seeing them hanging in kids mouths when they are playing and trying to talk with them in though.

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whomovedmychocolate · 16/08/2007 21:15

DD had one for a month and loved it then went off it. She was three months old but by four months didn't like it anymore.

I don't like to see them in the mouths of anyone big enough to say the word 'dummy' tbh but I may just be being too judgemental.

Saw a five year old today with one.

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taffy101 · 16/08/2007 21:18

Dummys are a great invention. They don't work for all babies, but both mine had them.

I have seen on a sids website that there is a correlation between dummy users being less affected by sids but this is by no means scientific - it is just numbers iyswim

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Meeely2 · 16/08/2007 21:19

we used them from day dot with our dt's, simply cos i couldn't sooth two babies at once. I am of mixed opinion, as they worked for us, but in March of this year, boys aged 2.3, we went to austria ski-ing, when we came home, we did not have a single photograph of them SANS dummy. I hated it! So we went cold turkey. Had a few very fretful nights, but it worked, we are now dummy free.

Like somone else said, nothing worse than a toddler walking round tesco with a 'noo noo' in, and my toddlers ended up like that!

However, at least you can throw a noo noo away, if you have a thumb sucker, FAR FAR harder to give that up and you still get the sticky out teeth (I had braces at 16!).

End of the day it is the baby's choice, some babies like it, some don't - if yous likes it then use them, but don't be a dummy dependant parent e.g. when they cry, plug em up - try other settling techniques first - we found it hard to wean ourselves off the noo noo's as well as the boys, in the end we had to throw them away so that WE wouldn't be tempted to give in!

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macneil · 16/08/2007 21:19

I remember me and my husband deciding we were totally against dummies from day one and my mum stayed with us a month after I gave birth and would keep shoving one into my baby's mouth and my husband would run in and whisper, loudly, 'DUMMY IN AGAIN! DUMMY IN AGAIN!' and we would both freak out and I'd have to have a word with my mother.

And jesus, mothers.

However, we quickly came to the conclusion that the dummy made her really happy when she was really unhappy, and then we went totally the other way and my husband sticks it in ALL THE TIME (she's 8.5months now) and my mum is always taking it out.

Annoyingly, the baby can both crawl and loves to pull her dummy out and put it back in, and I keep a couple of spares around in case I need one in a hurry, so she ends up finding one and putting it in all the time. They do look frightfully common, don't they? All my middle class friends have a no-dummy policy and I always have to make shabby excuses for mine constantly sucking away. And then they say things like, 'Oh, it's so clever the way she puts it in!'

Nonetheless, I sucked a dummy until I was THREE! I remember negotiating with my parents about giving it up, and I remember pretending to my friends when they came to visit that it was a doll's dummy - so really, we're talking well into the 3+ age. I really don't want my baby following suit, however in terms of the bad scary things dummies can do, I can say that I have beautifully straight unbraced teeth and learned to talk pretty early, and according to my parents never shut up. I would just take the dummy out to speak.

I am much more scared of thumbs, because you can't take them away, and they do seem to push teeth forward.

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rozzyraspberry · 16/08/2007 21:28

ds1 (4.5) sucks fingers, ds2 (2.5) sucks his thumb. Great when they were babies for comfort. However, short of cutting their hands off I can't take the blasted things off them!!!!

IME therefore, if a dummy stops them developing other habits like thumb sucking they are probably a good idea!!

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rozzyraspberry · 16/08/2007 21:30

Saying all that I should add that neither of my 2 ever shut up. 7 o'clock is bliss when the questions and stories stop - until 6am that is.

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kittenbaby · 19/08/2007 13:50

thanks for your opinions
xx

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