Possible missed miscarriage

[WelshAnna]

Hiya, I'm new to this but been reading so many posts since I got my bfp.
I got a very faint positive test on 28th June which then started to get stronger over the following weeks. When I went to see my midwife they went off my lmp date of 19th May as to date the pregnancy. I was diagnosed with Pcos in Jan this year and don't have regular periods. (they are roughly every other month but no set amount of days between).
My 12 week scan was booked in for Monday the 12th Aug I was excited and very nervous (this is my first pregnancy, me and my ex tried for 2 years with nothing and back 6 years ago tried for a year also with nothing).
When we got into the scan room the women asked again how far along we thought we were. So I told her the midwife said should be 12weeks. That's when she told us that there is a pregnancy sac and embryo there but it's more like 6 than 12and maybe the dates are out or it's possibly a missed miscarriage and the pregnancy is no longer viable. They then did an internal scan where there was no heartbeat but they were still very unsure and both kept looking at the screen saying this is a hard one. They have asked me to go back in 2 weeks time to the EPU for another internal scan. I've been heartbroken all week and I'm trying to be positive but it's hard. I never had much symptoms other than fatigue and sore boobs which I still have on and off. I'm still getting strong positive tests but I'm worried that's just the hcg still in my body. Could my body of held on for 7 weeks with no bleed or signs? Has anyone had the same situation? Thanks in advance

[kkl1]

Hey I'm sorry your going thought this I have had this twice one good outcome an one bad outcome the first one it was a missed miscarriage and I was ment to be 12 weeks went to the scan just 2 empty sacks went back 2 weeks later no change then the next time I feel pregnant on the pill so didn't no how far I would be but they couldn't see nothing and then they found a sack and was like I'm not sure but I'm now currently 25 weeks pregnant good luck hope all goes well for you xx

[Lkh2o]

Had a similar situation mine is bad news unfortunately. Im 13 weeks pregnant and was due to have my dating scan this Monday coming 19/08 but I started having pains and very light bleeding yesterday so went to the hospital. They done an internal scan on me and seen they the sac had been growing but there was nothing inside it. Was so confused because I had a scan at 7 weeks and seen a baby and heart so confused as to why it's empty now. Heartbroken to say the least. I hope it turns out a different story for you. This is my first miscarriage so finding it hard to process.

[WelshAnna]

Thank you for letting me know your experience. With your missed miscarriage did you bleed at all? Did you the miscarry naturally or through D&C? Sorry for the personal questions. Don't feel the need to answer if it's too personal. If this is a mmc then there's a possibility that it happened 7 weeks ago but have had no signs. I'm happy to hear that you are now having a healthy pregnancy! Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy 😊

[Catconfusion]

@WelshAnna I’m so so sorry this is happening. I had a mmc in February. I had some light spotting so went in for a scan at 10 weeks by my last period to find baby was 6 weeks. It’s difficult because I have pco too but I knew roughly when I’d ovulated because I’d been tracking it. The youngest the pregnancy could be was 8 weeks so I knew it was probably bad news as there would definitely be a heartbeat by then. When I went back in a week the baby hadn’t grown and still no heartbeat so definitely a mmc. I then had a ERPC surgery. It was heartbreaking.

I can imagine if you were getting a faint positive on 28th June you were probably about 10-12 days pregnant. If you add two weeks to this to compensate for irregular cycles it would make you about 3/4 weeks so your baby should be about 10 weeks now. By now there would definitely be a heartbeat so unfortunately it’s not looking good. I’m so sorry you have to go through this. The waiting is torturous. Could you go back in a weeks time? I would call the early pregnancy unit and see if you can go in earlier.

What I will say is it’s a tough road ahead. It takes a long time to feel yourself again but you will get there. I suffered an early miscarriage straight after mine but I am now pregnant again. I’m 6 weeks and having a early scan next week. I’m petrified it will happen again but I’ve come to learn there’s nothing you can do. It is very bad luck to go through this twice. Most miscarriages are due to random chromosomal issues. Remember you did nothing wrong. Try not to blame yourself.

I really hope the sonographer was wrong and things will work out for you. Let us know how you get on. Xxx

[WelshAnna]

Lkh2o
This is my first pregnancy and I'm realising it's alot more complicated than I thought. I completely understand how you feel as I broke down the whole day after the scan fearing the worse. Trying my hardest to be positive and thinking everything happens for a reason. Hope things go better for you in the future x

[Catconfusion]

@WelshAnna just to add I’ve heard some horror stories about natural mcs. I had the surgery and it was very quick and easy. If you have a d&c wait at least one natural period to try again. My secon early mc was probably because my body wasn’t recovered. We were told we could try straight away. Since then I’ve spoken to quite a few ladies who’ve suffered a second loss when they’ve tried soon after surgery. Xx

[OurChristmasMiracle]

My first MMC I should have been 14wks4 days and my baby had stopped growing at 8 weeks. I waited a further 10 days before having medical management so yes it is possible. I had no symptoms of miscarriage and never bled.

I was told that due to how long my baby hadnt been viable for they thought it best to intervene as it didn’t look likely I would miscarry naturally.

I’m sorry you are going through this.

[kkl1]

Hey no I didn't bleed didn't have pains the only thing that was different I felt odd the whole time then when I saw that I missed miscarried it kinda added up thank you and I hope it all turns out good for you xx

[DerbyshireGirly]

I waited around a month after finding out it was an anembryonic pregnancy before taking the medication to induce the miscarriage. I really don't know how long it would have taken my body to realise there was nothing there. I didn't have any cramping or bleeding at all and from memory I think the sac continued to grow.

Hope everything works out OP.

[whattodowith]

I’m so sorry OP, it probably isn’t going to be good news. I had two in 2017. No bleeding or pain at all with either, just found out at the 12 week scan. I’d had early reassurance scans with the second one and seen the heartbeat but it still stopped at 9 weeks.

Very sad. I’d highly recommend the surgical option, much quicker and easier physically and emotionally.

[WelshAnna]

I think the miscarriage could be starting I had some stringy blood when wiping this afternoon and now just had a small amount in my knickers. I've got very mild cramps at the moment but am expecting things to get worse. Sadly it wasn't meant to be this time x

[Catconfusion]

Im so sorry @WelshAnna please seek help if the pain/bleeding becomes unmanageable. Give the EPAU a call tomorrow as they’ll likely want to check you over.

There is a lot of support on here. I joined this thread just after my mmc www.mumsnet.com/Talk/miscarriage/3659841-First-Pregnancy-Missed-Miscarriage-Part-4?pg=8&order=

The ladies on this thread are lovely and I don’t know how I would have got through it without them. Xx

[kkl1]

Hey how are you xx

[WelshAnna]

@catconfusion I thought myself that I must be further along which is why last Monday I was so heartbroken and still am really. @kkl1 I'm just trying to distract myself with going to work etc (but even work is hard as I work in a day nursery so I'm surrounded by babies and toddlers.) I rang the early pregnancy unit this morning to say about the cramps and the pink blood (which is there when I wipe or is very little on a pad alot lighter than the start or end of a period) they said if there is lots of red blood or the cramping gets very intense to go to a +e and to try wait things out till next Wednesday as they won't really see me any sooner.
It's been a horrible road of waiting since the moment we got the positive as then we didn't have a clue how far along due to my irregular periods and being told I can't have an early scan to find out. Waiting 6 weeks till the scan was hard enough then the news they gave was horrible. My biggest fear of pregnancy was miscarriage or seeing nothing on the screen and I'm getting a mix of both in one go. 1 week and few days to go to finally find out exactly what is going on!

[Catconfusion]

@WelshAnna it’s simply horrible and my heart goes out to you. I think the EPAU should be supporting you more than they are. I was given open access to the Gynae ward after I got my bad news so I could go in any time of day or night if I was struggling. If the pain/bleeding gets unmanageable go straight to a&e. I didn’t want to miscarry at home as we’d just moved in and I didn’t want to taint the bathroom with those memories. They should be offering you the option of going into hospital for support. It is every woman’s worse nightmare and it’s very unlucky you’re in this position but you will be ok. For now just look after yourself. Get signed of work if it’s going to be tough being at work. Do you have a good support network. Xx

[Pip231018]

I am so sorry. I had a MMC in May. It was truly heartbreaking. I had no symptoms of miscarriage at all. I went for a scan at 7 weeks, they dated me at 6 and I had a heartbeat. Two weeks later I went for a scan and they told me there was no heartbeat. I went home and cried (a lot) then the next day went to EPU. They were amazing, the said they'd need to rescan me (it was bank holiday Monday). I returned the next day and they scanned me and told me I was 6+3 when I should have been 8+2. Because of the size, I needed to have a second opinion. Being told 3 times by 3 different people that my baby had no heartbeat was too much.

They said once the mother understands the loss the body tends to follow, I didn't miscarry naturally and I couldn't wait to have the treatment as I felt like a walking coffin. I was grateful I maintained the pregnancy sleeping otherwise I don't think I'd have slept for 4 days, I just needed it to be over. The medication worked and I lost fully at 8+5. I was alone, which I don't recommend as I found it quite traumatic (I said I wanted to be alone). I returned to work immediately, which was a mistake - you need time, even if you think you are ok, you're probably not.

I really hope that your dates work out for you and you don't have to experience this.

If that isn't the case, I promise as difficult as it is, you can get through it, because you have no choice. You're stronger than you feel right now.

Keeping everything crossed and wishing you the very very best. X

[WelshAnna]

@catconfussion I might ring again tomorrow if I still have cramps and bleeding. They have eased off now. This morning I think the women said she was from labour ward so doesn't do much with early pregnancy so I'll see again tomorrow. I just feel like I'm left in limbo about the whole situation. Not many people knew about the pregnancy only my partner, immediate family(mum, dad, brother and sister) and my best friend. My partner doesn't know what to say in these situations really hes still trying to think positively at the moment. I'm one who trys to hide my emotions from others which really doesn't help in these situations it took me 3days after till I'd speak to my mum on the phone I would only message her and I normally ring her all the time. Not sure if my mum has told the rest of the family and my friend is checking in on me and asking if I want to do stuff to take my mind off it. Just in work only my manager knew I was pregnant (I didn't tell her she seen the midwife ringing me) she knew I had a scan but I haven't said how it went and she hasn't asked so it's a bit difficult when I'm feeling down and no one understands why. I just don't want everyone to know about it really. There's been so many of the girls having successful pregnancy over the last year and I thought at last that will be me but nope 😢
Just being on here is really helping though and its a chance to speak to people who understand what your going through x

[Catconfusion]

@WelshAnna I would definitely call up today and see what support you can have. Hopefully the process won’t be too bad but it can be very painful and whatever happens it will be traumatic.

Hopefully when your partner accepts what’s happening he’ll be able to offer more support. My DH was also very positive about it working out until we definitely knew I was miscarrying. Do you think you could tell your manager? If you don’t want other people to know, surely she’ll keep it secret.

I felt similar to you: very alone and I didn’t want anyone to know. As time went on I actually was more inclined to tell people. It’s amazing how much support you get if you share. Sadly it’s also surprising how many ladies have been through this or something similar. On the surface it looks like lots have had healthy pregnancies but I bet there’s been some losses as well.

Whatever happens please don’t feel ashamed or blame yourself. You did nothing wrong. Most losses are down to chromosomal issues with the baby and completely out of your control. It was likely already decided when you conceived. Many ladies go on to have healthy babies after a loss. It doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you. Conception isn’t an exact science sadly and sometimes it just doesn’t work out.

Don’t forget this baby though. It made you a mum for the first time. It doesn’t matter how early you lose a pregnancy, you still lost a baby. Grieve for as long as it takes to feel like yourself again. I’d urge you to take some time off if you can. Thinking of you today! Xx

[WelshAnna]

Yesterday I started to have more intense cramps and the blood started to become bright red and increase. I went to work in the morning even though I had a feeling something bad was going to happen. I rang the hospital switch board at 1.30pm but didn't get an answer then rang the midwife who said try get hold of epau so they can see you straight away. Got through at 2.30pm and they told me to come straight to the ward. My partner had his daughter and no one else to have her so he wasn't able to come with me but my mum came instead. We went to the ward and they then told us epau is only open in the morning and sent us across the hospital to the a+e department. I was seen for obs and bloods then several obs throughout waiting. I kept needing to go back and forth the toilets and that's when it happened. I had to open the toilet door and ask a staff member to get my mum for me who then got a nurse and they took the sac away in a tub. I just kept looking at it shaking and crying. My partner arrived at the hospital as they were about to discuss what we would like to do with the remains. We decided to discuss things first. It was horrible and scary. I spent 5 hours in the hospital most of which was in a+e sat on a chair in pain. Luckily enough I am off work today anyway and have spoken to my manager who is working it out for me to be off the rest of the week and were closed bank hol. Im thinking I'll go back Thursday and hopefully be OK to get through the day.
Thank you for all the support you have given me! Xx

[Catconfusion]

@Welshanna I’m so sorry this has happened to you. Hopefully now the healing can start. There’s lots of support on here should you need it. Take care and when you’re feeling up to it check out the First pregnancy Missed Miscarriage thread as there are some lovely ladies on there who’ve all been through something similar ❤️ Xx