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38+3 and cant stop crying today(3 Posts)
I dunno whether this is hormonal or circumstantial but I just feel terrible today and cant stop crying.
My pregnancy was unplanned and came at an already stressful time for my partner and I -partners ex was trying to stop him seeing his DD from that relationship and the whole thing was heading for court. My partner and I after a extremely stressful month or so decided to keep baby. My feelings towards motherhood have been ambivalent throughout the pregnancy.
Fast forward through stressful events that eventually caused me to collapse at work with some sort of breakdown- was off a month, moving house, working on and letting my house out and partner being in and out of court with his ex over their daughter, my dad ending up in intensive care and my family being almost totally negative and unsupportive of me and partner through everything we've been through. My partner eventually got a good result in the courts 2-3 weeks back when he got shared residence of his daughter. We had some respite from that source of stress but only for a little while. Last week my partner got a solicitors letter from his ex demanding 3+ times the CSA assesment amount due for child maintainence. His divorce is now going through as well. I know if she doesnt get an inflated amount of money for child support she will try to go back on the clean financial break agreement they agreed in mediation and it will end it up slugged out with solicitors in the courts again.
I been hardly able think about baby, our focus seems to be with other people messing about with our lives. I just want it to stop, let us have some normalish time if one can have normalish time with a newborn.
I dont know whether this low mood is hormonal or circumstance. I just want to be able to enjoy life with the bloke I love...
I know your partner must be in a state of worry over his child 9although his Ex can't just over ride court like that, I rpesume his solicitor has been handed the letter?) but at this point he really does need to take the entirety of that onto himself and let you focus on the baby, and then forming a nond with the new child. You haven't (hardly surprisingly) got the energy or resilience to be an emotinal crutch for him, and you must tell him that. taht doesn't mean forever of course, but for a few months at least.
Sounds like you've had a really rough time recently. I think it's probably a combination of hormones and circumstance. I remember feeling quite resentful towards my dsc before ds was born because it wouldn't just be us - that was definitely hormonal. I think it's entirely natural to want to enjoy the arrival of your baby without a whole load of other stuff distracting you. But remember that this is just a rough patch and it will be sorted out one way or the other soon enough and you will be able to concentrate on your family unit... Best of luck with the birth!
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