Three under 2yrs?

[ComtessedeLancret]

My husband and I currently have two children, very close in age (just on 12mths apart) and our youngest is nearly 4 months old. About a week ago I found out that I’m pregnant with #3.

I haven’t told my husband this yet, even after a week I’m still processing. I went to my GP yesterday and had a blood test, I’m expecting a call back today to confirm results and will then take it from there.

I’ve no idea how far along I am, the digital pregnancy test came back saying conception was “3+ weeks” ago which the pamphlet explains means your GP would put at 5+ weeks. I haven’t had a period since my son was born so I don’t have an LMP to go by, expect once the blood test results come in I’ll have to have a dating scan.

In any case, if I go through with the pregnancy, I’m looking at having three kids under 2yrs old - which I know sounds mad.

Husband has recently been musing about becoming a SaHD as I have a higher earning potential and it would cut out the cost of childcare so part of me thinks “great, enjoy a third into the mix” but I don’t know if he’s really thought about what it’s like staying at home.

Going from one child to two hasn’t been that bad, but I expect two to three is a whole other level of challenging. Surely people manage though? Part of me thought I was happy with our pigeon pair, but now I find myself thinking how nice it’ll be for DD to have a sister or DS to have a brother.. I’m a little bit emotional I think, so it’s clouding my judgement a bit.

So far I’ve told my Mum and my MIL - they both just laughed hysterically - so somewhat supportive but not overly helpful in the scheme of things.

Sorry, not entirely sure what I want out of this post, perhaps somewhere just to put it all down instead of being left to my own thoughts..

[WishUponAStar88]

I only have 2 dc so no practical advice but I would imagine it’ll be very tough for a few years although hopefully they’d be lovely and close growing up and you get all the nappies etc done at once! Whether to continue the pregnancy is only your decision to make however I really would tell your husband, especiallu as his mum already knows. Good luck to you whichever path you go down

[sycamore54321]

That does sound like a lot to process. I'm sorry if I misunderstand but you have told your husband's mother and have not yet told him? I think you need to tell him very very soon to avoid serious damage to your relationship; he could be seriously hurt by that.

On close age gaps, my sister and I were born in the same year and we are best buddies together. My mum has always said it worked for her as it meant we were in almost the same stage at the same time and once she was done with nappies or whatever for one, she was almost done with the other. Now obviously three is different to two but not entirely unmanageable I would think?

[BrutusMcDogface]

You've told your mum and mil but not your husband?! Eek, I think you need to let him know asap; surely he should have been the first to know!

Anyway only you can say if you'd cope or not. I found going from 1-2 much harder than 2-3, but mine were a little more spaced out (3 under 4). Good luck

[ComtessedeLancret]

Thank you for the replies so far, I told my Mum and MiL more in a “holy shit what do I do” sense more than a “omg guess what” type way, also wanted to seek MiLs advice on telling my husband and she’s offered to babysit on the weekend so he and I can go to dinner and talk without distraction.

The more I think about it the more I find myself planning out work arrangements, finances, names, room formations etc so I’m somewhat worried that I’ve already set my mind to go through with it where my husband might have other thoughts and then it’s kind of an awful stalemate..

I do like the idea of close age gaps, I have found #2 a breeze because it didn’t feel that long that I was “out” of the newborn phase so it’s kind of felt “business as usual” just with another tiny human.

I want to be excited but I also feel like people are going to just be negative and judged when/if they find out - you know the dicky “don’t you have a TV” types.. despite the fact that I really shouldn’t give a fuck what people think/say..

[BendyBusBuggy]

I had three under two. Like PP said it means they have similar interests during their childhood

There area few practical considerations (buggy? Car?) but as there are plenty of people with triplets all equipment is available