Young mums

[Angharad07]

What would you consider the age of a ‘young mum’ these days?

[IlikemyTeahot]

15?

[comfortandjoy]

A young Mum would be someone youthful looking , unlike me with my wrinkles and greying hair . So, twenties ?

[Laurel543]

I’m 44 and currently very happily pregnant with my first. Anyone under about 35 looks pretty young to me
Seriously though, would probably say under 26 or so is considered a comparatively ‘young mum’ nowadays.

[m4rdybum]

I'd say under 21.

I'm 25, nearly 26, & don't feel like a young mum.

[Aspenn17]

In general I would say under 21/22 but I think it depends where you are from. I’m 27 and where I’m originally from that’s a totally normal age to have a baby, a lot of my friends had babies a couple of years ago but now I live in London I think anyone below 30 is considered a young mum! Most my local mum friends are 5 years older than me.

[Melmam]

Id say early 20's I had my first at 23 and felt I was a young mum I'm now 26 and have 2 definitely don't feel like a young mum anymore lol

[PickettBowtruckles]

20 and under perhaps? I’m 24 and pregnant with my first, and don’t particularly feel like a young mum!

[FASH84]

I think it's location (and house price) dependent. I'm 33 and the first of my close friends and uni friends to be pregnant. This is mainly because others want to be married/financially stable first. I've got a lot of weddings to go to in the next 28 months ago I'd imagine an influx of babies after. SIL was 28 when she had DN and her friends from her youth had mainly all had babies a few years before her, but she's from a different area. Her group also don't seem so fussed about owning property or marriage first, it caused a bit of tension when DB wanted them to have bought a house first, he says it was up to her about marriage (when) she's now pregnant with number two at 30 and says she doesn't think they'll ever afford the type of wedding she originally wanted, so it just depends what you want and when really.

[Honey456]

I’ll be almost 27 when our baby is born. I’d say the other NCT Mum’s are in their 30’s already. Although I don’t feel young as we bought our house/ got married already and have professional careers for our age.

I would consider young early 20’s.

[Roeslein]

Would say under 26-27 as well. 26 was when people from school and uni started having babies. My best friend was just 25 when she gave birth, and when she announced you would have thought she was 16 based on people's reactions!

[unintentionalthreadkiller]

I was 32 and am on the younger side of mums in my kids class. I would consider 28 and under comparatively young now.

[Mousefunky]

Under 25.

[Gem173]

I’m 20 and pregnant and I consider myself a young mum. However I live in a privately rented flat with my fiancée and work full time at a nhs hospital. So although I am young my brain and lifestyle is much older than some my age. Not only that but my fiancée and I pay for everything our bills etc and do not rely on family. So all in all I think it all depends on living circumstances.

[HappyLollipop]

Before having my son I would have said under 18 but having gone to NCT classes at 24 and being the youngest there by miles I'd say anyone under 30 can probably qualify as a young mum these days.

[HellaBella0]

I agree that it's location dependent. Where I live (SW London) I would say it's under 28. However in my original home town most girls had babies in their early to mid 20s.

[RedBlu]

I had my first at 29. I was the youngest in our antenatal group.

Around here most people have their first after they are 30.

[InDubiousBattle]

Under 25

[Lululota]

I don't know a soul who had their first under 30 and in the parts of London where I live and work very rarely see any young mothers .I think there are more late 30s/40s mums than ever.

[IncyWincyMouseRat]

I’m 25 and do feel comparatively young. Most women around here have babies at 30-40. Plenty of women I went to school with do have kids already but all of my close friendship group are childless.

[PastaSauceHoarder]

I'm married, own a house and have a nearly one-year-old daughter - I was 22 a couple of months ago but I don't really feel like a young mum!

[Angharad07]

Thanks for all the replies. I’m 20 and pregnant, I’ll be 21 when baby is born. I have to say, I’m worried about the sigma attached to having a child so early because I meet the (sadly) stereotype of the unprepared and irresponsible young mother.

Baby wasn’t planned, neither myself nor partner is in a stable financial position, we don’t have anywhere to live. We’re working on it, obviously. I’ll be graduating in July and dp has a degree.

None of our friends are the type who want children young and telling other people has been something that is causing me great anxiety. Dp parents know and are delighted...I don’t have the courage to tell any of my family.

[Lmj25]

Don't worry about what other people think @Angharad07. I was 16 when I fell pregnant with my first 17 when I gave birth and he's the best thing that has happened to me, everyone loves him. It was a shock to people at first including myself but in the end I didn't let it bother me it's nothing to do with anyone else as long as you're happy that's all that matters I'm now 21 and due my 2nd at the end of the year and I can't wait, enjoy your pregnancy and your baby when they're here. good luck

[AbbeyLouise]

@Angharad07 I was in the same position when I found out I was pregnant, I was 20 (21 when I had him) and in my second year of uni, working part time and my partner had no job. It's hard and I totally get the anxiety around telling people, especially since I knew no one else who had a baby either. But 2 years later, I'm studying for a masters, we both work and have a steady income, we're engaged and have a lovely home, and we're planning our second baby. Honestly things do just work themselves out in the end, you'll find your own way through it

It's lovely you have the support of you DPs family too, it definitely makes it easier.

[Laurel543]

@angharad07
I really hope all is going well for you in your pregnancy and that you have had a positive reception for your happy news.
There is a huge difference between being ‘a young Mum’ and being ‘too young’

21 is definitely not too young to have a baby (I think that’s entirely personal to each person tbh and women can be fab Mums st any age). For what it’s worth, if I heard of anyone expecting at your age, my first reaction would be ‘oooh, how lovely!’ Just the same as any baby announcement.

A few of my friends and family had children in their early 20s and have really enjoyed bringing up their kids whilst youthful and full of energy. We are now mostly in our early 40s and the ones who had them earlier are enjoying freedoms that the later Mums can only dream about for years!

It sounds like you and your partner both have a good education and that you will graduate before the baby comes. You may feel unprepared (like all new parents!) but you do have a solid foundation and I am sure you’ll be absolutely fine.

Please don’t worry about what other people ‘might’ think. I expect that people will be a lot less judgey than you fear and you will hopefully be pleasantly surprised.

Good luck with it all. I am excited for you!

[Tweetypie95]

I am 23, I know quite a lot of girls who I went to school with who are mums to 1 or more and I didn't really look at them as young mums.

Since becoming pregnant though I most defiantly feel like a young mum-to-be. At hospital appointments my fiancé and I have so far been the youngest there by quite a lot. Although we do look young too.

I think everyone assumes he is a lovely little accident but we were actually trying for 2 years.

I would say young mums is anything under 27 these days.

Don't let other people get to you. (I found this hard at first) If it is what you want then that is all that matters. You've clearly been working hard towards your degree's. I'm sure you'll both find your feet. Sounds like you have support! :)