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What do you believe finally got you your bfp?

(75 Posts)
yourmyforever Sun 29-Apr-18 20:34:23

Im always reading the conception board but thought I would post here as you have all been so lucky as to get your bfp that I’m hoping you can give me some advice... smile

So does anyone have advice/tips for things I could do to finally get my own bfp as trying to conceive is really affecting me at the moment, I am wishing time would hurry up to get through to ovulation, then through the 2ww and then when AF arrives I turn into a different person. I have been charting my bbt on fertility friend and using opk’s 2/3 times a day. This cycle I got a positive opk on day 13 and day 14, we BD on 13/14/15 and used pre-seed. I was certain there was no way we could have missed ovulation but today which is 9dpo, the cramps and spotting have begun. I’ve taken a Frer which is negative so certain I’m not pregnant. My cycles are fairly short at 24/25 days but I am at a complete loss, I don’t know what else we could have done this month and it still hasn’t worked.. we have a 4year old ds so we have conceived. Any advice from anyone would be so appreciated as I’m at such a loss now.

Sorry for the long post!

OP’s posts: |
jl3514 Sun 29-Apr-18 20:39:00

Some people say (and I know it's hard) to just take a back seat from it all for a month or so that not to stress about it too much and it may just happen xx

boatrace30 Sun 29-Apr-18 20:44:03

In all honestly, being less stressed, but very very hard to achieve. I have fertility issues and for my first bfp just after being referred to a specially, I'm sure I relaxed slightly feeling like something was being done.
I got my second bfp after seeing a consultant and being prescribed Clomid. I never took it as for pregnant before I could! Again I'm sure the knowledge I had it relaxed me.
But no matter how much people tell you to relax it's a hard hard thing to do.

boatrace30 Sun 29-Apr-18 20:45:13

Sorry for typos. "For" should be "got" and "specially" should be specialist

booandbumpp Sun 29-Apr-18 20:47:24

Honestly, the month I got pregnant we barely tried compared to other months - I'd just started a new job, was tired all the time, and ttc took a massive back seat. We DTD twice - once two days before expected ovulation, and once two days after.
I forgot about it, tested when I was 3 days late because I was going on holiday and wanted to know if I could drink.
So, yeah, try not to think about it too much, and relax would be my advice.
Other months I got myself so worked up about it, testing during the two week wait and getting really frustrated so I know how hard it can be though.
Good luck x

MeadowHay Sun 29-Apr-18 20:49:35

Yeah I agree with being relaxed about it, not forcing too much sex if we didn't feel like it and just enjoying each other. We were trying for about 5 months although my periods were weird for the first three as I'd just come off the combined oral contraceptive so I think really once things settled it was done by the second proper cycle. I didn't use OPKs or anything like that, if we didn't feel like having sex we just didn't, I tracked my cycles using Fertility Friend (the free version) and we tried to loosely have sex every other day around the time I may be fertile but that was all.

IndianaMoleWoman Sun 29-Apr-18 20:53:11

Sex every other day to allow sperm to regroup a bit, using the BalanceActive fertility gel during the fertile week, both times. Pillow under bum and legs in the air for twenty minutes after. Took three years to have our first, conceived second cycle second time around using this method.

lljkk Sun 29-Apr-18 20:53:31

Having sex was definitely involved.
(more seriously): my cycles settled longer when I took regular vitamin B6 (for something else). Supposed to lengthen the luteal phase which gives more time for implantation.

BabyMoonPie Sun 29-Apr-18 20:54:45

Having an orgasm! We had tried a variety of things and DH read that the muscle spasms that happen when you have an orgasm can help the sperm on their way. It's the only new thing we tried in month 8 of TTC so I think that (possibly in combination with fertility lubricant and hanging off the side of the bed so gravity could do it's thing) is what got us a BFP!

Hesburger Sun 29-Apr-18 20:56:08

Cutting out sugar (apart from a little fruit) after ovulation.

Exercise.

BlueberrySquash Sun 29-Apr-18 20:56:22

For me it was a change in career (very stressful job previously) and gradual weight loss thanks to exercise and diet. I’d tried everything else including fertility treatment but within months of changing my lifestyle and reaching my target weight I was pregnant naturally.

hopingandprayingthistime Sun 29-Apr-18 20:59:39

Being relaxed, time off work which just so happened to coincide with fertile week, having sex about 4-5 times in fertile week...

boho2u Sun 29-Apr-18 21:00:48

Sperm meets egg plans and vitamin B6

UrgentExitRequired Sun 29-Apr-18 21:02:21

Preseed gel and DTD both sides of ovulation.

amymel2016 Sun 29-Apr-18 21:02:25

I got pregnant the month I finally accepted it wouldn't happen without some sort of medical intervention and finally went to the GP for blood tests. I stopped charting my cycle/using those stick things, I started drinking again, eating pate and started planning holidays totally unsuitable for babies. Basically, as soon as I chilled out, it happened. I know it's easy to say but give yourself a month or two off, chill out, drink wine and see what happens.

MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig Sun 29-Apr-18 21:05:23

I conceived our first born about six months after my mum died. We’d been trying for a year because the time was right and I wanted to tell her she’d be a grandma before she passed away from a terminal illness. I’m sure my body was trying to tell me that I just wasn’t ready for the stress yet, that I had enough to deal with already. She knew we were trying though.

PastramiAndRye Sun 29-Apr-18 21:05:44

You've got quite a short cycle; how long is your luteal phase? If it's under 10 days, you might want to look into ways to lengthen it (eg vit B6, acupuncture, etc). If there isn't enough time for a fertilised egg to implant, you'll have trouble conceiving.

voxnihili Sun 29-Apr-18 21:06:32

OPKs, temping and a mooncup. We only managed to dtd once that cycle after many previous attempts.

Lauren12Belle Sun 29-Apr-18 21:07:32

I’ve always been plagued with fertility problems; I didn’t use birth control at all for 5 years prior to meeting my husband and never once fell pregnant.

The first time I fell pregnant was after 18 months, the second time was the first time we had sex without birth control. I put it down to a very positive change in lifestyle (gym bunny without being too obsessive) and Maca smoothies! But veryone is different. Wishing you all the best

stephb1991 Sun 29-Apr-18 21:09:39

I firmly believe it was taking a holiday! My friends kept saying they knew so many people who had conceived on holiday after trying for a while.....I didn't believe them and then guess what!? It happened to me! I think because you're relaxed, having a good time and have put the stress of trying to the back of your mind, bam! It happened!

Billie353 Sun 29-Apr-18 21:10:28

For us it happened the month after the doctor told me it was the end of the road and unlikely it would ever happen at all. I was 41 at the time. That was after 6 years of trying, failed IVF and a miscarriage. Now 43 and 25 weeks with number 2! That doctor changed everything for us! grin

WazFlimFlam Sun 29-Apr-18 21:12:30

Giving up caffeine. It had never agreed with me.

gryffen Sun 29-Apr-18 21:17:39

It took us 10yrs and being told we would never have kids and after being really ill and needing lumbar punctures and blood transfusion etc I fell pregnant and had dd1 in November 2014.

I did get my tubes flushed out in 2013 and was diagnosed with pernicious anemia in 2014 during me being ill but no other issues apart from PCOS.

This time round we just went for fun and boom I'm due in August.

I'm taking it both of you have had tests done etc?

yourmyforever Sun 29-Apr-18 21:25:05

Thank you so much everyone, already this is making me feel a lot better and positive that it will happen eventually! We’ve had tests and everything ‘appears’ normal, it’s only my slightly short luteal phase that I can see might be causing a problem so I will definitely look into the B6. Its just very frustrating when something so huge feels out of your control sad x

OP’s posts: |
LaurieMarlow Sun 29-Apr-18 21:25:18

Not sure what to attribute it to but the month we conceived our second (after 10 months of trying) was different in the following ways

I was taking omega 3 supplements (which had a big effect on my well being)
I'd lost a bit of weight (nothing major, but 4/5 pounds)
Had reflexology
We had finally moved into our new house after a lot of stress to get there
DH had just been offered a much more lucrative job
Family issues on my side meant that our attention was elsewhere

So a combination of being more mentally and physically ready. Or alternatively that was the only good egg I'd produced in 10 months. Who knows?

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