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Gender - help me get my stupid head around this

(17 Posts)
glittergoat Mon 19-Mar-18 19:29:11

So, am PG with last child. Had stupidly thought it was a girl, just found out it's a boy (and healthy which is of course the main bloody thing) but really struggling to get my head around another boy. Felt like this with other DC and I know I got my head around it but would appreciate some stories on why boys (or rather more boys are great )!

helpmum2003 Mon 19-Mar-18 19:31:56

Boys are loving and uncomplicated. And you have all the boys kit already 😊

Ginger1982 Mon 19-Mar-18 19:32:47

Little girls are brats! 😆

HolyGoats Mon 19-Mar-18 19:35:05

My little boys are the funniest, silliest, most loving little creatures you could ever meet. They’re also best friends who are currently snuggled up next to each other on the sofa.

VelvetKitty Mon 19-Mar-18 19:35:23

@Ginger1982 what a ridiculous generalisation. And OP I think you mean sex rather than gender. Just be happy you're having a healthy baby - there are lots of people that would give anything for that.

SmallBlondeMama Mon 19-Mar-18 19:45:51

"Mommy, I'm going to marry you when I grow up"

Icklepickle101 Mon 19-Mar-18 19:47:41

I hear you OP. I was convinced this baby was a boy and found out she was a girl I was a teeny bit disappointed at the time but 3 weeks later I’m over the moon! Give it time to readjust the image you had in your head and I’m sure you will be much more positive smile

Ginger1982 Mon 19-Mar-18 20:53:39

VelvetKitty wind your neck in. I was joking! I was a little girl at one time!!!

Ekphrasis Mon 19-Mar-18 20:57:44

I understand; if always assumed I'd have girls as I came from a girl heavy family but a bit and another in the way! I had a small cry actually. But then was fine.

I actually think this is quite common as we were girls ourselves; there's something about relating to your own child hood when you think of your children.

Ds is unbelievably sweet about upcoming ds2, far more than I know I was with my sibling!

Also, I feel really responsible for raising boys who aren't going to see themselves differently to girls eg stereotypes etc. And respect boundaries etc in relation to women when they're older. I challenge rubbish picked up from school and help ds1 see that he can quite easily and happily do anything girls do and vice versa. (He plays football but dance was an option!) He is often a very typical boy but very kind and sensitive too. And loves sewing!

This is a fab new magazine about having boys - really good resources.

AssassinatedBeauty Mon 19-Mar-18 21:00:28

Because he'll be his own unique little person, regardless of sex. Children are great, whether boys or girls. Watching them grow and change, learn and develop. Seeing their characters start to come out as they learn to talk and express themselves. It's an amazing process.

Ekphrasis Mon 19-Mar-18 21:02:09

I'm also secretly glad I may not have to worry quite so much about Instagram with a boy than a girl. I know it's not a given though.

I think dealing with the whole media portrayal of women with a teen girl and how young girls use / access social media quite terrifying when I think back to how basic tv with 4 channels and the odd teen mag affected my own body image.

Isadora2007 Mon 19-Mar-18 21:04:55

Having two of each I can honestly say boys seem to have less drama. Their friendships seem less complicated.
On the huge plus side I have felt privileged to have raised a man who understands women- who doesn’t flinch about periods, who knows how to work a hoover and cook meals and cleans up after himself and others. A man who cries and hugs and who isn’t frightened To talk about feelings and who fiercely loves. I am proud to call him my son and the woman who ends up with him will probably love me loads after she stops being scared.

Boys rock.

windchimesabotage Mon 19-Mar-18 21:10:39

I had thought my first was a girl and my mum particularly was really excited to be having a grand daughter. I was less scared of having a girl because I thought id know what to do more..... then it turned out to be a boy and tbh I was devastated. My mum actually said 'oh dear' when I told her which didnt help.

When he was born though and as he grew I realised that every baby is different. When you have your baby in front of you and you watch them develop their personality that is obviously so much more important than gender. Its so not about boy or girl and actually gender does not have as much baring on personality as you expect it to when youa re pregnant for some reason. I think I was frightened Id get this little 'lad' who was completely alien to me. But of course I didnt, I got my son who is a sweet, caring and thoughtful little boy. I wouldnt change him for the world..... and actually this time I was hoping for another boy!!
Got a girl this time lol!! Such is life. And im sure when she is born it will be the same thing. Ie she will smash any expectations I had of her due to her gender.

Ekphrasis Mon 19-Mar-18 21:39:29

Awesome @Isadora2007. That's what I aim for.

blinkineckmum Mon 19-Mar-18 22:05:59

I have a boy and 2 girls and love them all the same. They each amaze me in different ways which have nothing to do with sex or gender.

Smellyjo Mon 19-Mar-18 22:17:19

These comments are lovely (mostly!). Hope they give you the lift you need OP. Have one girl and don't know for this one, I'd love a boy but don't feel too fussed, want 3 though so it's not my last chance hopefully. I can imagine feeling similarly to you, doesn't mean anything bad about how you'll feel once he's here.

Catinthecorner Mon 19-Mar-18 22:35:47

I can’t have children. I’ll happily take your boys off your hands if you’d like?

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