TW - possible missed miscarriage. Can't stop crying.

[Bibijayne]

I should be 6w +4 today. I've had morning sickness for a week and a half. Sore boobs, though they're not as bad as they were. Maybe that's a sign.

Went for an early private scan today.

They found what looked like a very small sack. On transvaginal ultrasound sound. Measuring no more than 3 weeks. I've been booked for a rescan in two weeks. But told to look out for bleeding and call the EPU if I see any.

The ladies were so nice. So professional. I held it together long enough to book the rescan and get out of there. You could see that they were trying to be hopeful for me, but not looking that optimistic.

I may not know exactly when I ovulated. But I do know my dates well enough to know that i should be a lot further along than 2 or 3 weeks. I tested positive two days before missed period on 31 Dec. With a much stronger line on the 2nd Jan when my period was due.

I just... I still have all the symptoms of being pregnant. But my baby hasn't grown.

I now just have to wait.

[Addy2]

I think early scans do so much more harm than good - the amount of similar stories I have seen on here! Most of them are fine in the end and the scan was just too early. They're notoriously difficult to pick up that early on. Easier said than done, I know, but do try not to worry. for you

[Jen41]

Hi Bibijayne
I’ve just been through this after having a private scan early in January. I was extremely upset after the scan. They tried to refer me to the early pregnancy unit at the hospital but in the end I had to wait for a doctors appt a week after. Then I had to push hard to get the referral to the hospital for another scan.
I had that last Tuesday and sadly it confirmed it was a failed pregnancy and I was booked in for a managed miscarriage yesterday. In the end this week my body took over and I’ve been miscarrying all week with the bad bit during the night on Thursday, so the hospital appt was a bit of a formality.
I’m sorry I’m sharing a sad story. Everyone is different and there will be examples of early scans that turn out differently.
Whatever the outcome, I wish you all the best.
I’m gutted, partly as well because I’m 42 and single now so it was undoubtedly my last chance to have a child. But I have to say I feel better now than I did after that first scan. Uncertainty and waiting for a conclusion is a horrible time. I hope you have support and someone to give you plenty of hugs.
My only advice is, do not let the nhs fob you off. My GP was shockingly ignorant about missed miscarriages. The early in pregnancy unit were reluctant to take the referral from her until I kicked off. However once I got there the staff were great and totally understand that it’s important for a woman to get clarity and closure in those circumstances.
Big hugs x

[Bibijayne]

Thank you @Jen41 and sorry for your loss. I think I might see if I can get refresh to the EPU. I was so excited to see my little baby. I was really hoping for a different outcome today.

[Jen41]

Addy2, I don’t disagree with what you’ve said in a lot of respects. But for some women like me, over 40, high risk of miscarriage and having previously had a mmc, I’m so glad I had that viability scan. If I hadn’t, I would have been potentially unaware until after 12 weeks when finally having my first scan. As it is I’ve had my miscarriage this week so it would have been the same outcome but I think it’s helped me prepare for it. And me and my mum were so excited, any more weeks of planning would have added to the heartbreak.
So whilst I agree for many many women and sincerely hopefully for the OP things turn out positively- it’s not always a bad thing to get an early viability confirmation.

[Bibijayne]

Right now, I just want to know. I'm just guessing everything and it's horrible.

I still feel nauseous. I don't know if that's good or not.

My husband is being bloody amazing. Dropped his rugby game and spent the afternoon with me and the dog. I love him so much. I really wanted us to have a LO we could love and bring up together.

[harrietm87]

Hi @Bibijayne, so sorry that you're going through this. I had two natural miscarriages in a row, so when I didn't start bleeding with my third pregnancy I was sure all would be fine. I had an early scan at 7 weeks but the pregnancy was showing as 5 weeks. I had to go back for a rescan 2 weeks later and it was confirmed as a missed miscarriage. I opted for an MVA.

While waiting for the rescan though I read so many positive stories - lots of women do have a happy outcome. It's so hard to measure at this stage. So just wait it out and see what happens. Unfortunately you just can't read anything into symptoms or lack of them, you just have to wait.

Also it's important to remember that miscarriages are very common, which doesn't make it better in any way but it does mean that your next pregnancy stands every chance of working out. And fwiw I was in that 1% who have 3 consecutive mcs and I'm now pregnant for the 4th time, 29 weeks and all is fine. Wishing you all the best.

[Bibijayne]

I so want to be hopeful, but my breasts are no longer sore. I thought it was because I changed bras... But now I think it might be something else.

I just don't feel pregnant anymore.

I was so excited this morning. I don't know what to do. I can't face this again.

I had to lower when we're TTC and then completely come off my bipolar meds when we got the BFP. Everything feels so raw right now.

[Jen41]

So sorry darlin. I’m glad your hubby is being great. Wishing you that happy family you deserve soon x

[Bibijayne]

So confused. Still getting pregnancy symptoms. Nausea is waves. Heavy, sore breasts. Heartburn.

[harrietm87]

OP it's so hard but you have to try not to read anything into the symptoms/lack of them. With a missed mc, the body still thinks it is pregnant (hence why it is "missed") so you can still have pregnancy symptoms. I had raging nausea with mine. Equally, perfectly healthy pregnancies can have no symptoms at all.

This is such a nightmare time but you will get through it. Just need to hold out until your next scan.

[Bibijayne]

Yeah. Thanks. I just hate this limbo.

[peachgreen]

Ach I really feel for you OP. Will be thinking of you.

[Soon2bemum2017]

hey OP hopefully this will reassure you.

i have a TV scan done by EPU at 4 weeks which is really unusual because you can't see anything at all and i mean Nothing!... we even had the consultant come in just to make sure as this scan was to check for ectopic and when she asked my geststion i said 4 weeks from LMP her response was why are we scanning when you are too early to see anything.

i think when they said 3 weeks they actually meant 5 weeks from LMP and therefore it is possible that everything is just perfectly fine!

at my 5 week scan I saw a tiny bubble and a tiny yolk sac measuring around 5 weeks... then at my 7 week scan i had a tiny fetal pole in there with a heartbeat but only measuring 6 weeks... by my dating scan at 13 weeks my little bubble had caught up

basically i think they have confused you with their words, and also even then early scans can be out by a massive amount measurement wise.

i hope this helps and that everything works out ok for you OP ❤️

[Bibijayne]

Thanks @Soon2bemum2017 - it's weird not knowing what's going on and just having to wait!

[Soon2bemum2017]

Hey OP how are you getting on? ❤️

[BlueMermaid96]

Hello lovely,
I suffered a mmc at 6w but only found out at 3 month scan... It was hard, it really was terrifying. I started bleeding the day before my scan, I called the helpline as I started bleeding after sex. They said it was because of sex I was bleeding but all was okay, hours went past and none stop bleeding so I went to EPU. Had a look womb was closed, just go next day to scan as normal.
Went for my scan and had to go from belly to an internal scan.
All I saw was a black sack, I asked if that was the baby and had no response. I was clueless and so was my partner. Next thing we're being taken to the quiet room, to find out I had a mmc. The baby measured at 6 weeks.

I was still having symptoms and had a bump growing for 2 weeks after and during the pain of miscarriage. Due to the body still thinking we are pregnant we have the symptoms.

Go to epu again if you feel any need too, they should of booked you in a week after not two.
But they do that incase your baby is growing and its not a potential mmc, the sperm lives in your uterus for over a week which can always alternate when your due dates are. It can always change, just stay positive.

Don't let go of any hopes yet, stay positive and get along your daily life as hard as it is but the more you think about the bad things, the worst off you will be overall...

Hope that's helped, let us know how you get on xx

[TheCatsPaws]

Hi OP.

I’ve had five pregnancies, one successful.

First pregnancy. At 6 weeks, no fetus was visible. I started spotting and thought I’d lost the baby. Three days later, there was a heartbeat. DS was fine.

Pregnancy two, measured 5 weeks at 6 weeks. Got a hb at 6w5 days but still measured small. By 8 weeks, the baby had died and I had a missed miscarriage.

3 and 4 were both early miscarriages.

Pregnancy 5, I had a heartbeat at 6 weeks and it had gone at 7. No signs.

There is honestly no way to know which way this will go, but I understand the pain and anguish at being left in limbo. If you want to PM me feel free, I’ve been where you are.

I hope you feel better