My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Get updates on how your baby develops, your body changes, and what you can expect during each week of your pregnancy by signing up to the Mumsnet Pregnancy Newsletters.

Pregnancy

Slightly controversial, but are you expecting a gift after you give birth?

209 replies

allthecheese · 12/12/2017 18:12

Appreciate the concept of 'push presents' is a little tacky. But after 9 months of carrying your baby, dealing with sickness and piles and varicose veins and weird cravings and people commenting on your body...are you expecting a gift from your partner? And if so, what?

I have to admit I'll be a little upset if my DH doesn't get me anything, but I'm not after an eternity ring with massive stones or anything crazy. Something like a simple gold pendant necklace.

OP posts:
Report
NerNerNerNerBATMAN · 12/12/2017 18:14

Hmm seriously? No. I'm not expecting anything. I'll be more than happy if I come through it with a healthy baby and my bits vaguely in tact.

Report
MirandaWest · 12/12/2017 18:15

I didn't expect anything except for a baby each time.

Report
yearofthehorse · 12/12/2017 18:16

I did. I got a baby.

Report
NerNerNerNerBATMAN · 12/12/2017 18:16

And I'll add that I've really, really suffered with this pregnancy. It's not like I've just breezed through it. The thought of getting a push present at the end is absolutely ridiculous and very poor taste imo

Report
PersianCatLady · 12/12/2017 18:16

Is this thread a joke?

Report
TealStar · 12/12/2017 18:17

Yes. A healthy baby.

Report
Fekko · 12/12/2017 18:17

A nice sandwich and decent cup of tea.

Report
JediStoleMyBike · 12/12/2017 18:17

By the end of it you won't give a shit who brought you what. You will just be glad it's over and your baby is healthy.
Not sure why you need a gift? Are you getting your DH one? He was there at the very start, after all.

Report
Migraleve · 12/12/2017 18:17

A gift from my partner Confused unless giving birth took place on my birthday, Valentine's Day or Christmas, then no, of course i would not expect a gift.

You are setting yourself up for a fall by already deciding you will be upset at a lack of gift. When baby arrives you have bigger things to think about than silly upset because someone never bought you a 'well done' present. If you really feel he should buy you som thing please please tell him now because it's not generally a done thing and he is not a mind reader.

Report
Fekko · 12/12/2017 18:18

Oh you want a meadal?

Report
Justmuddlingalong · 12/12/2017 18:18

I'm glad you realise it is controversial. It is. And grabby. And immature.

Report
CrossFreelancer · 12/12/2017 18:18

Once you have had the baby I don't think you will care or even want anything.
An eternity ring would be nice but I don't think DH will get me anything. Maybe flowers?

Report
GinIsIn · 12/12/2017 18:19

I don’t get it - you aren’t acting as a surrogate - the baby is for you too, isn’t it?! Confused

Report
Hannabee123 · 12/12/2017 18:19

If I give birth Christmas day (due boxing day) then yeah. If not then god no 😂 I'd rather him save money for stuff we might actually need.

Report
allthecheese · 12/12/2017 18:20

I didn't realise it would be that controversial!!

OP posts:
Report
AgathaF · 12/12/2017 18:20

This getting a gift after having a baby seems very entitled to me. Just enjoy the baby you created together and don't worry about having a materialistic present.

Report
PrimeraVez · 12/12/2017 18:20

Fuck it, yes. I am. I’m expecting something to mark the occasion, in the way that I would expect a gift on a significant wedding anniversary or any other ‘milestone’ event, such as a graduation. When my DS was born, DH gave me a lovely necklace with DS’s name on it. It’s something I wear a lot and will cherish forever. Now I’m expecting DC2, I’m expecting something again. It doesn’t have to be blingy or expensive. DH also wrote me a very touching card which I keep in my bedside drawer.

Report
PersianCatLady · 12/12/2017 18:20

I think you did realise.

Report
FellOutOfBed2wice · 12/12/2017 18:21

My first daughter “brought” me a ring when she was born but her birth coincided with my 30th birthday so that was why. It’s an antique ruby and it’s very lovely but I don’t consider it a present for her being born, it was just a nice idea my husband had as I had her at that time. My second DD is super stingy, she brought me nothing! Grin

Report
RefuseTheLies · 12/12/2017 18:21

Bloody right I was expecting a present. I had ivf so had a million injections and several very invasive procedures and lost all my dignity. Pregnancy then went on to ruin my boobs, my stomach and my foof (episiotomy). I had gestational diabetes and spd and my thyroid went haywire. Not to mention how taking maternity leave fucked up my career. So yeah - I think I earned my diamond ring.

Report
olicat · 12/12/2017 18:22

The baby is the gift. Not trying to be facetious but it's genuinely what I think! 😁

Report
PinkAvocado · 12/12/2017 18:23

It would be odd to feel disappointed by not getting something material after giving birth. If there is something greater you can hold in that moment compared to your baby, I cannot think of it.

Report

Newsletters you might like

Discover Exclusive Savings!

Sign up to our Money Saver newsletter now and receive exclusive deals and hot tips on where to find the biggest online bargains, tailored just for Mumsnetters.

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

Parent-Approved Gems Await!

Subscribe to our weekly Swears By newsletter and receive handpicked recommendations for parents, by parents, every Sunday.

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

PrimeraVez · 12/12/2017 18:23

Oh, and to balance it out, I also bought DH a gift. Throughout my pregnancy with DS, we referred to the baby as a certain (cute) animal so when he was born, I bought DH a pair of cuff links with this animal on them and left them in the baby’s cot for him to find. He wears them on special occasions and when he has a ‘big’ meeting at work.

Report
AmUsername · 12/12/2017 18:24

I realise I'm going to get jumped on but I had presents for both of my DC: a new handbag for DD1 and a gorgeous new pair of shoes for DD2. DH said he wanted me to feel like a person still and not 'just a mum' and tbh, after 9 months of horrific Hyperemesis, I deserved them!! Grin

Report
LS83 · 12/12/2017 18:24

Ugh, no.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.