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Slightly controversial, but are you expecting a gift after you give birth?

(210 Posts)
allthecheese Tue 12-Dec-17 18:12:52

Appreciate the concept of 'push presents' is a little tacky. But after 9 months of carrying your baby, dealing with sickness and piles and varicose veins and weird cravings and people commenting on your body...are you expecting a gift from your partner? And if so, what?

I have to admit I'll be a little upset if my DH doesn't get me anything, but I'm not after an eternity ring with massive stones or anything crazy. Something like a simple gold pendant necklace.

NerNerNerNerBATMAN Tue 12-Dec-17 18:14:35

hmm seriously? No. I'm not expecting anything. I'll be more than happy if I come through it with a healthy baby and my bits vaguely in tact.

MirandaWest Tue 12-Dec-17 18:15:35

I didn't expect anything except for a baby each time.

yearofthehorse Tue 12-Dec-17 18:16:06

I did. I got a baby.

NerNerNerNerBATMAN Tue 12-Dec-17 18:16:16

And I'll add that I've really, really suffered with this pregnancy. It's not like I've just breezed through it. The thought of getting a push present at the end is absolutely ridiculous and very poor taste imo

PersianCatLady Tue 12-Dec-17 18:16:38

Is this thread a joke?

TealStar Tue 12-Dec-17 18:17:18

Yes. A healthy baby.

Fekko Tue 12-Dec-17 18:17:31

A nice sandwich and decent cup of tea.

JediStoleMyBike Tue 12-Dec-17 18:17:33

By the end of it you won't give a shit who brought you what. You will just be glad it's over and your baby is healthy.
Not sure why you need a gift? Are you getting your DH one? He was there at the very start, after all.

Migraleve Tue 12-Dec-17 18:17:43

A gift from my partner confused unless giving birth took place on my birthday, Valentine's Day or Christmas, then no, of course i would not expect a gift.

You are setting yourself up for a fall by already deciding you will be upset at a lack of gift. When baby arrives you have bigger things to think about than silly upset because someone never bought you a 'well done' present. If you really feel he should buy you som thing please please tell him now because it's not generally a done thing and he is not a mind reader.

Fekko Tue 12-Dec-17 18:18:04

Oh you want a meadal?

Justmuddlingalong Tue 12-Dec-17 18:18:44

I'm glad you realise it is controversial. It is. And grabby. And immature.

CrossFreelancer Tue 12-Dec-17 18:18:46

Once you have had the baby I don't think you will care or even want anything.
An eternity ring would be nice but I don't think DH will get me anything. Maybe flowers?

FenellaMaxwellsPony Tue 12-Dec-17 18:19:01

I don’t get it - you aren’t acting as a surrogate - the baby is for you too, isn’t it?! confused

Hannabee123 Tue 12-Dec-17 18:19:35

If I give birth Christmas day (due boxing day) then yeah. If not then god no 😂 I'd rather him save money for stuff we might actually need.

allthecheese Tue 12-Dec-17 18:20:01

I didn't realise it would be that controversial!!

AgathaF Tue 12-Dec-17 18:20:19

This getting a gift after having a baby seems very entitled to me. Just enjoy the baby you created together and don't worry about having a materialistic present.

PrimeraVez Tue 12-Dec-17 18:20:29

Fuck it, yes. I am. I’m expecting something to mark the occasion, in the way that I would expect a gift on a significant wedding anniversary or any other ‘milestone’ event, such as a graduation. When my DS was born, DH gave me a lovely necklace with DS’s name on it. It’s something I wear a lot and will cherish forever. Now I’m expecting DC2, I’m expecting something again. It doesn’t have to be blingy or expensive. DH also wrote me a very touching card which I keep in my bedside drawer.

PersianCatLady Tue 12-Dec-17 18:20:51

I think you did realise.

FellOutOfBed2wice Tue 12-Dec-17 18:21:09

My first daughter “brought” me a ring when she was born but her birth coincided with my 30th birthday so that was why. It’s an antique ruby and it’s very lovely but I don’t consider it a present for her being born, it was just a nice idea my husband had as I had her at that time. My second DD is super stingy, she brought me nothing! grin

RefuseTheLies Tue 12-Dec-17 18:21:43

Bloody right I was expecting a present. I had ivf so had a million injections and several very invasive procedures and lost all my dignity. Pregnancy then went on to ruin my boobs, my stomach and my foof (episiotomy). I had gestational diabetes and spd and my thyroid went haywire. Not to mention how taking maternity leave fucked up my career. So yeah - I think I earned my diamond ring.

olicat Tue 12-Dec-17 18:22:32

The baby is the gift. Not trying to be facetious but it's genuinely what I think! 😁

PinkAvocado Tue 12-Dec-17 18:23:15

It would be odd to feel disappointed by not getting something material after giving birth. If there is something greater you can hold in that moment compared to your baby, I cannot think of it.

PrimeraVez Tue 12-Dec-17 18:23:39

Oh, and to balance it out, I also bought DH a gift. Throughout my pregnancy with DS, we referred to the baby as a certain (cute) animal so when he was born, I bought DH a pair of cuff links with this animal on them and left them in the baby’s cot for him to find. He wears them on special occasions and when he has a ‘big’ meeting at work.

AmUsername Tue 12-Dec-17 18:24:20

I realise I'm going to get jumped on but I had presents for both of my DC: a new handbag for DD1 and a gorgeous new pair of shoes for DD2. DH said he wanted me to feel like a person still and not 'just a mum' and tbh, after 9 months of horrific Hyperemesis, I deserved them!! grin

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