Posifrickentive into 2018 - thread 20 for those pregnant after mc

[MsJuniper]

New thread - bringing lots of happiness, support and understanding through Christmas and into the new year!

[Smurf123]

Thanks Msjuniper for the new thread!
I had another scan yesterday and so far all looking good. 25 weeks 4 days and today I just got given the form to fill in for maternity leave! Still feels so strange to be at this point. I've avoided doing any of this stuff so far and only been looking scan to scan but form actually has to be in by next week!
Hope everyone is keeping well.

[Ekphrasis]

Great news @Smurf123!

No I'm not thinking of mat leave at all yet - I've planned an enormous amount of work to do between now and Easter

[peachgreen]

Thanks for the thread. I've only got 6 days left at work before mat leave!

[LisaSimpsonsbff]

Thanks for the new thread - and welcome to all the new people, didn't get a chance to say hi on the old one!

[brogueish]

Thank you for the new thread MrsJ :)

[Shanii]

Hi guys I’m new to this Mumsnet, I suffered a miscarriage in August and found out I was pregnant again on Saturday, I’m very early on but absolutely terrified as I’ve found out the same time as last and only feel sicky but haven’t been sick, and tired all the time and have some cramps.
I may be overthinking it but how did you guys deal with the anxiety? Tia

[Lifeofpies]

Thanks for the thread, MrsJ

[MsJuniper]

Welcome @Shanii - it's such an anxious time isn't it. The only way I could deal with it was just taking one moment at a time, trying to breathe through any panics and not beating myself up for being so anxious. Do you have a supportive doctor and can you access an early scan?

@Hollymchollyface my early and investigative scans have all been internal. The sonographers have always been very careful and understanding.

[PenguinChristmas]

I’m glad I found this thread. I suffered a miscarriage end of start of September. Found out I was pregnant again start November. Been terrified ever since I check constantly when I wipe and find myself panicking constantly.

Had some bleeding a few weeks ago so EPU scanned and saw heart beat dates 6.5 weeks (now 9 by scan dates) but im still terrified constantly.

[notparticularlypatient]

Thanks for the new thread @MsJuniper, and congrats on today's milestone. I remember that moment with DD, so happy for you!

@brogueish it must be so reassuring to get back those test results and get the all clear. I am also 41 and dreading the coming weeks. But somehow very inspiring to see other
pregnancies progressing!

@LisaSimpsonsbff congratulations on your good scan! Given that you haven't been feeling nauseous earlier on, I don't think it means anything for how the pregnancy is progressing at this point. Try not to worry, although I know that is not possible in real life...

I have my seven week scan tomorrow, and am of course absolutely terrified.

I'm sure I have forgotten lots of people, but I'm on my phone so can't read back. Hi to other new people (I also just joined)!

[Shanii]

@MsJuniper I rang up today to try for an appointment but it’s a busy time, I have my first midwife appointment on Tuesday but hoping to ring tomorrow for doctor to try get an early scan, but it wouldn’t be my normal GP.
I’m terrified, I haven’t told anyone but my partner! Too scared to have to tell everyone all over again.
I try to calm myself down but constantly checking and every pain I think something is wrong

[Babydreaming]

@shanii I’m in a similar position! Only 5 weeks and super anxious due to 2 previous losses! I just take each day as it comes and talk things through with my husband when having doubts. It’s really hard though and I’ve taken way too many tests!

[Shanii]

@Babydreaming yeah I’m about 5 weeks, I lost my baby at 6+3 weeks and I’m just absolutely terrified, I did have an early scan with that one and was told that they didn’t have a heartbeat I’ve pretty much took a test a day! But if everything plans out I’m hoping to put them all to good news with the announcements!
Congratulations and I really hope it all goes well for you!

[mogulfield]

Hello to all the new people waves hopefully you’ll find this thread as helpful as I have. Especially when I was going mad when my symptoms went away!
peach I’m 30 weeks and the baby’s room is still our junk room, bare floor boards and still needs plastering! I’ve hardly bought anything (we have a 3 year old already so some stuff we have). But I sort of don’t believe I’m going to end up with a baby, but I’m not particularly worried Day to day about anything going wrong. It’s very bizarre!
At 34 weeks I would pack a bag though, you never know 😃

[ForeverHopeful21]

I really need some support.
Haven't been on the thread in a while as I've been quite happily plodding along with the pregnancy. Now 22 weeks and so so happy.
Maybe its my disbelief that I've made it this far but tonight I've had a very sleepless night. Lots of flashbacks of my previous loss and now wide awake and feeling sad.
I have really made an effort in the past 10 weeks to be more positive but tonight my thoughts have really taken over

[Ekphrasis]

I'm sorry hopeful. When were your losses? It sounds like you're still processing what happened - a little bit like trauma and probably grief.

Can I suggest maybe chatting to any of the amazing ladies at PANDAS? There're a charity for ante and post natal mental health - I had severe anxiety throughout my first pregnancy caused by medical issues and I swear one phone call really helped, but they do have a great website and local groups including fb groups. I wonder if you could get some counselling through your gp? The perinatal teams are very fast at seeing people.

[MsJuniper]

Hi @ForeverHopeful21 - coincidentally I was looking at the April thread earlier and was pleased to see your posts there as I had wondered how you were getting on. I am 2 weeks ahead of you and I have also struggled recently. I think it's the transition from those early weeks of focusing on "the pregnancy" to this point when it starts to be about this real baby that everyone assumes is a certainty and a little voice in your head still says "what if...?" - it's a lot to take in.

I think you've been a brilliant example of posifrickentivity, but it can even be good to let yourself think through those fears and your past experience. Ek's advice is really good and of course you can always offload here. Hope you don't have a tough day ahead

[hotcookie]

Hi everyone, welcome to the newcomers, I hope your stay shall be 40 weeks.

hopeful I know where you are coming from, I'm 23 weeks today (according to my scan, I'm pretty sure I'm more like 22+3) and although I am generally much better and much more positive I still have sleepless nights and moments of absolute terror! I haven't really felt movement (butterflies etc) but I'm sure that I'm feeling kicks (they feel like muscle twitches, but in places I have never felt them!)

I'm (un)lucky enough to be having regular scans to check cervical length due to previous LLETZ and ERPC, so I get to see her every two weeks (next one tomorrow) which helps, but I have to admit it takes every little bit of my willpower not to get the scanner out at work and check in between. I thought once I felt stuff it would help, but I think now I just worry if I haven't been kicked in a while!

We are starting to relax a little more though, and I am a bit terrified as I have finally allowed myself to book antenatal classes (which as I might have left it a bit late are actually for late april + due dates, and I'm due the 11th People have also sent us stuff for the baby which totally freaks me out and it is kept in the loft.

We have NO room for the baby, and won't until we get building work done on the house, which we will hopefully be starting around the time I'm pretty pregnant! Just to give us something to distract us from everything else

[mammabear4]

Hi lovely ladies! Sorry it’s taken so long to post but we’ve been wrapped up in the newborn bubble.

@AnUtterIdiot massive congratulations on the birth of your little girl!!!

After posting last I went into spontaneous labour at 8pm Monday 4th Dec, got to hospital at 9.15ish and the first of our two beautiful BOYS! was born at 9.49pm. The second came 16 mins later at 10.05pm. Both born breech and no complications at all with me or the babies. We did have a week stay in hospital though as the boys needed antibiotics as a precaution for going so long with their waters gone, and then their blood sugar levels dropped slightly so they needed feeding tubes fitting to give them an extra boost before my milk came in properly. So, so happy to be home and settled now ☺️💙💙

[mammabear4]

Totally outing myself.. but I don’t care 😄
Introducing Hugo & George x

[AmyB1986]

Found the three again and came to say congratulations @mammabear4 your boys are gorgeous and you look fab too! Enjoy your newborn bubble it's a wonderful place to be.

Good luck to everyone who has upcoming scans and appointments

[LisaSimpsonsbff]

Congratulations, mammabear - wonderful news! Hope you and your beautiful boys and are all doing well and enjoying getting to know each other

[Hollymchollyface]

I'm out unfortunately, my spotting developed into full on bleeding so 99% sure I've miscarried.
All the best to everyone else on this thread, hope to be back soon.
I'm off to drink mulled wine and strong coffee and go and take my heart rate over 150 in the gym (after some rest of course).
Thank you for the (short and sweet) support xxx

[MsJuniper]

@mammabear4 what beautiful photos, thank you for sharing them and many congratulations on your lovely boys. Great to hear that you are all back at home now.

@Hollymchollyface so sorry to hear you've had more bleeding. Definitely still get checked if you can. I hope you are back here soon

[Hazandduck]

Congratulations @mammabear, gorgeous boys, gorgeous names and a gorgeous Mamma Bear 😊