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Just found out I’m pregnant. What can I do not to miscarry this time around??

(27 Posts)
Tanyelx Wed 06-Dec-17 18:46:42

I had s miscarriage in September this year and just found outback I’m pregnant again!
I had a d&c as I was 14 weeks along and didn’t pass my baby myself.
Was the most heartbreaking thing to ever happen to me.
Doctors didn’t say there was a reason behind it. Just said it happened!
What can I do this time around to make sure or have less of a chance of it to happen again?
Any medications my doctors can give me?
Anything I can personally do?
Thanks a lot

JediStoleMyBike Wed 06-Dec-17 18:49:11

Nothing, sadly. Unless you've been investigated and the doctors have prescribed something because you need it, there's nothing they can give you to help.
I am so sorry you've had such an awful time. The only thing I can suggest is to try and think of this pregnancy as new. I know it's so, so hard (from experience) but try not to tie it to much to what has gone before. Eat well, rest up and take your folic acid. Good luck. Try not to stress. Do you have an early pregnancy unit who could support you with some reassurance scans maybe?

PotteringAlong Wed 06-Dec-17 18:50:42

Nothing at all I’m afraid. It’s just a waiting game...

thingymaboob Wed 06-Dec-17 18:51:49

There is nothing you can do. Nothing you did or didn't do caused your miscarriage last time. I have been there and thought the same but you just have to ride it out. I miscarried and beat myself up about it for months. I am now 35 weeks pregnant. I wish you all the best with your pregnancy 💐

Shen0102 Wed 06-Dec-17 19:01:55

You can relax and not stress, take up yoga if you have to & meditate :-)

Ishouldreallybeworkingg Wed 06-Dec-17 19:12:08

As there was no reason behind it there is nothing you can do.

My advice however would be to look after yourself, take it easy and minimalise stress where possible.

Wishing you all the luck in the world with your pregnancy flowers

Imaginosity Wed 06-Dec-17 21:39:37

I had two miscarroages at 12 weeks and was put on baby asprin when I got pregnant next time. Maybe talk to your doctor to see if that's an option in your case. It must be baby asprin though as you're not meant to take the standard dose while pregnant I think.

ClareAD Wed 06-Dec-17 22:01:20

Hi there, I too had a miscarriage in September and am pregnant again now at 5 weeks. Just wanted to reach out and say you're not alone. I am terrified too but just taking it day by day. The early pregnancy unit/ emergency gynae unit was wonderful to me during my miscarriage so I phoned them today and they said they'd scan me at seven weeks. I have found that it's important to be firm with GPs and push for this referral. Also going to ask the GP about the aspirin option. Hoping for the best, thinking of you. X

Wolfiefan Wed 06-Dec-17 22:02:56

Nothing. Because you didn't cause what happened last time.
I had a mmc with my first pg. Second resulted in DS.
Focus on keeping you healthy and rested. Take care and good luck.

BertieBotts Wed 06-Dec-17 22:05:11

So sorry to hear of your miscarriage.

Unfortunately others are right, there is nothing you can do to prevent miscarriage. Do rest assured that the chances of two miscarriages in a row are pretty rare - the odds are in your favour for this to go well.

If you would like, there is a lovely and supportive Pregnancy after Miscarriage thread on here somewhere, the ladies there are so nice and understand everything you're going through.

And yes def ask for extra scans if you'd like them.

BertieBotts Wed 06-Dec-17 22:08:06

Here you go:

Don't be put off by the length, just jump in at the last page. It looks like they will be starting Thread 20 soon so you'll get a new start on that one anyway. smile

Mishappening Wed 06-Dec-17 22:08:25

Miscarriages just happen and there is usually nothing you can do to prevent them. I know from experience that it is hard to feel optimistic when you have had such a bad time before. But, in the absence of a diagnosed cause for your miscarriage (and most commonly there is no cause found) then there are no specific preventive measures you can take. I just used to comfort myself with the knowledge that there were acrobats, gardeners, athletes all trotting about pregnant and none the worse for all that activity. Pregnancies are designed to stay put and the miscarriages are the exception rather than the rule.

chocolateorangeowls Wed 06-Dec-17 22:11:25

Nothing you can do unfortunately, if you could miscarriage wouldn’t be so common.

If it helps at all I lost my first baby in similar circumstances but my second pregnancy went with no problems.

Good luck flowers

QueenAravisOfArchenland Thu 07-Dec-17 10:17:48

You can relax and not stress, take up yoga if you have to & meditate :-)

This is certainly worth doing for the mum's sake just because it makes her feel more calm, but for the record, stress does not cause miscarriage and being stressed does NOT make you more likely to miscarry.

mindutopia Thu 07-Dec-17 11:00:21

There's absolutely nothing you can do as it's unfortunately just one of those things, unless you have a known health issue that is causing it. But in the vast majority of cases, it's just a bit of a genetic fluke and nothing you can do to cause or prevent it. I had very much the same experience as you. I had a mc in April (d&c at 11 weeks after waiting 6 weeks after mmc). I got pregnant again in May. I'm now 30 weeks. I've had a lovely, straightforward pregnancy this time. So try not to worry and just enjoy being pregnant again.

ForeverHopeful21 Thu 07-Dec-17 17:32:27

Firstly I'm so sorry for your loss and what you went through flowers
Secondly congratulations on your pregnancy!

I had a miscarriage at 12 weeks that also had a lot of complications. I was not only traumatised but also very ill for many months following. But I'm now pregnant again and currently 21 weeks and so far so good. Its been a long road and I won't lie its been really difficult controlling the worry.

I made a personal decision to take baby aspirin even though I haven't had any tests done to say that it would help. (My consultant and midwives all know about this.)
I also decided for piece of mind that I'd do everything possible to stay fit and healthy and I also reduced my hours at work. Although none of these things were the cause of my miscarriage it has helped me mentally knowing that I'm looking after myself physically, if that makes sense?

The best advice that I can give is to deal with the pregnancy however you feel you can best get through it. For me, I pretty much spent the first 12 weeks pretending that it wasn't happening. This was the only way that I could stop the worry and panic. I then suddenly woke up one day and decided that I wanted to enjoy it and that I didn't want to look back and regret letting such an amazing time in my life pass me by. I've embraced it as much as I can. I mean, I definitely haven't shouted it from the rooftops and there will be no baby shower etc etc, but I am really happy that I'm pregnant and today my baby is still very much in there so I count myself as lucky.
Wishing you all the best xx

NimbleKnitter Thu 07-Dec-17 17:59:30

Most miscarriages are for chromosomal reasons ie the cell division didn't work out properly, and the baby has the wrong number of chromosomes.

There is nothing you can do to change this - either help or hinder.

Making a human from two teeny eggs is a complicated business. The best you can do is take care of yourself, eat well and sleep as much as you can.

Baby's got this x

1stTimeRounder Thu 07-Dec-17 21:27:38

I wouldn't take baby aspirin as if your blood is thin already it could actually cause a problem.

I had investigations for recurrent miscarriage and they test how your blood clots (too sticky/too thin/just right) if it's too sticky they would then get you to take aspirin to thin it. But if your blood was just right or too thin taking aspirin could make your blood too thin iyswim

Also a recent study in Australia showed that taking vitamin B3 could reduce the risk of miscarriage and birth defects. Check out below link!

JediStoleMyBike Fri 08-Dec-17 08:34:28

How are you feeling OP?

LisaSimpsonsbff Fri 08-Dec-17 10:12:45

The NHS urged caution about the B3 thing, which was a lot of hype about one study on four families. I think from what they're saying eating vitamin B3 rich food can't hurt, but there's no reason to start taking lots of it as supplements:

Ekphrasis Fri 08-Dec-17 10:52:46

Congratulations! I'm on the pregnancy after mc thread. The best advice is to focus all your energy into telling yourself this is a completely different pregnancy. Take each step and day at a time.

You may worry incessantly and google constantly; posting on the thread can really help. I still worry at 18 weeks but it's not so bad now.

Reassurance scans can be helpful for some and not for others - it's only a snap shot of that moment. I don't find them helpful as my mc was predicted by an early scan where baby was ok but 2 weeks too small. The limbo was awful so I chose not to do any till 12 weeks (did have a nipt test a week before though which had a scan).

I do completely understand how many find them very helpful though so it's down to the individual.

Best of luck in your pregnancy!

CL1982 Fri 08-Dec-17 10:53:20

hi OP - we had x3 early miscarriages. I took aspirin, thryoxine and progesterone. They have just proven that progesterone is pretty useless for maintaining a healthy pregnancy but who knows whether it was luck, the combo of the three or one of them that did it.

Just be as positive as possible -it's really important to look forwards and try to be positive even when it's hard. You're pregnant and now are more likely to carry this baby to term than lose it flowers

LisaSimpsonsbff Fri 08-Dec-17 13:08:14

I've also had three early miscarriages, am on pregnancy no 4 now and am on some drugs too (including the discredited progesterone!) - but I just wanted to point out that you're very unlikely to persuade your doctor to give you anything, and that's fine and as it should be. It's because your chances of success in this pregnancy are so high - as high as someone who's never had a miscarriage. They throw stuff at people like me and CL1982 because they're pretty certain there's something wrong with us (even if they don't know what), but the odds are incredibly high that there's nothing at all wrong with you, which is why no one wants to put you on anything. I just didn't want you to panic that there was treatment that you should be getting and weren't - it's completely normal for women who have had one loss to be treated as low risk because, happily, you are.

CL1982 Fri 08-Dec-17 13:57:45

@LisaSimpsonsbff I totally agree with you. Honestly, we need so much more research on early miscarriage but most of the time it's sadly just a mess up in chromosomes or your body fumbling the ball so to speak. It doesn't make it any less heartbreaking.

I do wonder if there is a combined issue with the fact that we test so early now (realistically our mums wouldn't have known they were pregnant until possibly 6 but more likely 8 weeks - my mum said pregnancy tests were incredibly expensive when she was expecting so you just waited and then saw your GP) and that we think deeo down often that everything is pretty much 'fixable' when it's sometimes just not.

I know from research after the miscarriages that most doctors would still assume there weren't nefarious underlying reasons for our 'bad luck' until MC #4 which was horrible at the time - even though they were willing to give us more tests for NKCs and blood disorders. Luckily as i said, the likelihood for women who have had a single miscarriage is a very good outcome that she'll have a live birth next time.

LisaSimpsonsbff Fri 08-Dec-17 14:13:30

I think that it is true that fewer women knew about miscarriages in the past, but also that a lot more women suffered in silence. I knew before I took a test with all four of mine, and I know that's not universal but I do think plenty of women knew exactly what their 'bad, late period' was and just didn't tell anyone. I also think that a lot of women who 'couldn't get pregnant' could now be better identified as women who 'couldn't stay pregnant', so they might have a better chance of getting some help. Tommys have the aim of halving miscarriages by 2030, so I don't think we should just accept that recurrent miscarriage, in particular, is 'just one of those things'. But all of this is irrelevant to OP - sorry for derailing!

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