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Advice please - drinking alcohol before finding out at 10 weeks

(29 Posts)
greatorex2017 Wed 22-Nov-17 13:04:46

Hi everyone

This is my first post here I'm hoping for some advice as I'm worried sick I have harmed my baby.

I found out I was pregnant at 10 weeks and have my first 12 week scan next week, so no alcohol or smoking when I found out! However I was going out each weekend partying and getting drunk, smoking cigs... plus drinking a few large glasses of wine each night after work. I've heard of foetal alcohol syndrome and am so worried I may have caused this...

Has anyone been in similar shoes and everything has worked out okay??

Thanks x

LeNil Wed 22-Nov-17 13:11:17

I got incredibly drunk (and smoked) at a wedding before finding out I was pregnant, so before 10 weeks. As soon as I knew I stopped, although I might have had a couple of glasses of Champagne at Christmas and NY. Ds was born fit and well at over 4.3 kilos. He’s now a healthy 5yo.
Don’t worry, I’m not the only one amongst my friends that this has happened to, no one, amongst my friends,
has had anything other than healthy babies.

ijustwannadance Wed 22-Nov-17 13:17:54

Placenta doesn't come into effect until 8+ weeks I think.

Before that baby gets what it needs from yolk sack so it shouldn't have been affected be the alcohol.

Try not to panic. Speak to midwife next week if still worried.

Curiousgeorgey Wed 22-Nov-17 13:24:49

A relative drank and took drugs until she found out at 10 weeks. She worried herself sick but her daughter is completely healthy, happy and on track developmentally.

LisaSimpsonsbff Wed 22-Nov-17 19:28:24

I think you should talk to your midwife for reassurance, but also remember that for most of human history no one even knew that pregnant women shouldn't drink, and their babies were mostly just fine. Name a famous person in British history you admire and their mother probably wasn't teetotal during their pregnancy! Similarly the cigarettes - obviously no one's saying it's ideal, but there was a time where smoking in pregnancy was incredibly common (I've seen a leaflet from the 1950s where it says that pregnant women should probably just have '2 or 3 cigarettes a day'). Obviously the rates of problems were higher then, and that's why we don't do it now - but the vast majority of babies were fine.

JoJoSM2 Wed 22-Nov-17 20:33:16

A few large glasses of wine each night + more at weekends is basically daily binge drinking. I think there’s a strong chance of things having gone wrong. However, it’s not always clear cut and not all heavy drinkers have babies with FAS.

It’s great that you’ve now stopped and wish you the best of luck keeping that up.

acornsandnuts Wed 22-Nov-17 20:38:34

DH and I are very unorganized and never planned either pregnancies. I drank, occasionally heavily during the first weeks unaware and actually smoked during dc1.

Both perfectly healthy, both nearly 8lb. One now at university the other found A levels.

acornsandnuts Wed 22-Nov-17 20:39:33

* smoked during the first few weeks. I did stop when I found I was pregnant.

bluejelly Wed 22-Nov-17 20:43:55

I drank quite heavily and took class A drugs before I knew blush
I did give up both the moment I found out though.
Dd is now 18 and perfect in every way (though annoying at times, obvs)

LisaSimpsonsbff Wed 22-Nov-17 20:54:03

I think there’s a strong chance of things having gone wrong.

Wtf? You have absolutely no way of knowing that, and I bet you have no statistics to back it up. All you've done is panicked OP about something she now can't change - what on earth do you think that will achieve?

LisaSimpsonsbff Wed 22-Nov-17 20:58:22

Here's a (reassuring) article based on advice from the British Pregnancy Advisory Service:

It talks about exactly the problem that women in OP's position are panicked unnecessarily

YerAWizardHarry Wed 22-Nov-17 21:00:20

I found out i was pregnant at 24 weeks. I was an 18 year old party girl out every weekend and my son is almost 5 and absolutely perfect

roobrr Wed 22-Nov-17 21:00:48

I drank myself silly on my work Christmas do. Passed out, hungover for days.

Found out a few weeks later and I was mortified and spent the next 7ish months worrying! I had no case to smile DS is 7 and absolutely fine!

SilverdaleGlen Wed 22-Nov-17 21:01:03

I thought DD1 was a tequila hangover for a week, it was Christmas party season and I was mainly trollied. She's 8 now and fine. Speak to your MW for reassurance but it will be fine.

confused123456 Wed 22-Nov-17 21:02:04

I didn't find out until I was nearly a month pregnant. I was drinking and smoking. In fact I drank during my pregnancy, nowhere near as much as normal though. My baby was fine.
My mum drank and smoked through all 3 pregnancies and we were all fine.

randomer Wed 22-Nov-17 21:04:48

Nothing has gone wrong. It will be fine.

stonecircle Wed 22-Nov-17 21:05:40

Jesus JoJo - what a terrible thing to say hmm.

OP I went to the dr when I discovered I was pregnant with ds1 to get reassurance as I’d been drinking quite a lot until then. I also thought I was hungover rather than pregnant. He’s a strapping 22 year old now and didn’t suffer any ill effects.

Dairymilkmuncher Wed 22-Nov-17 21:06:02

I didn't know I was pregnant with my first for the first ten weeks and I had drank and smoked heaps, I had also taken a lot of cold and flu medication, ibuprophen etc etc when I first met the midwife in a panic she calmed me down and just said that baby's at the age are stronger than you think and not to worry.

He was fine and is perfect now! Even people who are trying to conceive don't stay sober the whole time I wouldn't worry just make sure you start with your pregnancy vitamins and healthy choices asap

bambambini Wed 22-Nov-17 21:09:37

I didn’t know till about 10 weeks and wasn’t planned so was going out and drinking a lot. I’ll admit i felt terrible and worried through the pregnancy.

Baby was fine snd is a healthy, intelligent teenager now. If you’re worried speak to your doctor or an expert on this. Chances are your baby will be absolutely fine - but I know how you feel.

SheGotBetteDavisEyes Wed 22-Nov-17 21:10:06

A few large glasses of wine each night + more at weekends is basically daily binge drinking. I think there’s a strong chance of things having gone wrong

What on earth are you basing that on? You obviously don't have a clue what you're talking about. There isn't 'a strong chance of things having gone wrong' at all.

OP, ignore that. Really - totally ignore it. The internet is full of uninformed crap on FAS. There's some very useful peer reviewed research out there (Australian? I think) that will put your mind at rest. It's a few years old but very thorough. I'll try to dig it out for you.

Do NOT worry. Your baby will be fine. Eat well, rest and look forward to journey ahead of you.

squishysquirmy Wed 22-Nov-17 21:16:51

Your baby will almost certainly be fine.

The advice is there for good reason, but it's about risk not certainties. And JoJoSM2 is vastly overestimating those risks and is not nearly as well informed as she thinks she is.

eg, the risk of an individual baby suffering FAS from your situation might be very low, but if every mother drank heavily throughout pregnancy then there would sadly be more babies with problems because small risk X massive number = lots.

It is really common for women to drink and smoke etc during the first few weeks of pregnancy because so many of us don't know we are pregnant then!
I got really pissed (many, many glasses of wine and shots etc) on a night out when I was unknowingly pregnant, and worried about it a bit but everything was 100% fine. DD was a very healthy baby and is a super happy, bright toddler now.

You have cut out the drink and cigarettes now which is good, and will reduce your overall risk.

Try not to panic about it or beat yourself up (easier said than done I know!). You did not know you were pregnant, you are doing the right thing now and the risks are still very low.


woundedbutwalking Wed 22-Nov-17 21:19:41

Got very pissed & smoked before I found out I was pregnant- the rest of my pregnancy was sober (not teetotal) no smoking and my daughter is perfect smile

JoJoSM2 Thu 23-Nov-17 09:06:14

Here’s some basic information re FAS. And yes, I’d be reassuring if someone wrote they got smashed before their period was late. But have a look at the links - most organ’s develop in the first 10 weeks and drinking a lot and daily isn’t the same as half a pint once a month!

squishysquirmy Thu 23-Nov-17 09:20:15

JoJo No-one here is telling the op she should keep drinking.
What are you trying to achieve exactly?
Your links do NOT support your earlier assertion that "there is a strong chance of things having gone wrong".
They basically hammer home the point that pregnant women shouldn't drink. Which op knows already.

This form your first link: "If you didn’t know you were pregnant and you drank alcohol during early pregnancy, don’t panic. Talk to your GP or midwife about any concerns you may have. Just because you may have drunk does not necessarily mean that your unborn baby has been harmed" is good advice for the op, and sums up what most of us have been saying.

The chance of her baby having an alcohol related problem is still very low, even if it is not as low as it would be for a tee-totaller.

Unless you believe that excessive stress is a fantastic thing for pregnant women and their babies, why don't you stop with your misinformation and panic mongering bullshit?

LisaSimpsonsbff Thu 23-Nov-17 09:26:09

Ok: a) you obviously don't understand the difference between a risk, a high probability and a certainty. You didn't say it could have caused problems - which no one here has denied - you said it was a strong chance. You'll notice that none of those links you posted - which are designed to scare women off drinking - include stats on how likely it is. That's because those numbers are hard to know, but also not likely enough to be scary enough for their message. It's not true that, as you implied, most women in OP's position will have babies with FAS or other health problems. It just isn't.
B) Again, how do you think this helps her now? Do you think she should have an abortion? Because no healthcare professional will advise that - not her midwife, not her doctor. Because it's a ludicrous over-reaction. So, if she's going to carry on being pregnant what do you think scaring her will do?

No one is encouraging pregnant women to drink. On a societal level it's clearly best they don't. But on an individual level, the odds are OP will be just fine, just as the vast majority of women in her situation are.

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