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Too fat to successfully carry a baby

(23 Posts)
lookingforthecorkscrew Mon 16-Oct-17 09:31:40

Since miscarrying in April that ⬆️ is the thought that’s been rolling around in my brain. I’m 5 weeks pregnant again and absolutely terrified that I’ll miscarry again because my body isn’t healthy enough to sustain a pregnancy.

I don’t mean to offend anyone with this, I certainly only apply these thoughts and feelings to my own situation. I spend my days and evenings googling miscarriage rates and issues for overweight mothers, I’m convinced myself that I’m not up to this.

I’m 36, 5ft 3 and a size 20 btw.

abbsisspartacus Mon 16-Oct-17 09:34:58

You can go on a diet during pregnancy talk to your doctor?

Fwiw a lady I knew spent her pregnancy exercising gently on Drs orders she was large and had a successful pregnancy

SolidarityGdansk Mon 16-Oct-17 09:35:50

I am a similar size and height to you and have had a successful pregnancy.

flowers I know early pregnancy is very stressful but be kind to yourself

lookingforthecorkscrew Mon 16-Oct-17 09:36:22

I’m trying to eat healthily, but if this is anything like previous pregnancies I’m going to feel pretty grim pretty soon, and only carbs will help.

PotteringAlong Mon 16-Oct-17 09:37:11

Places like slimming world have separate plans you can follow during pregnancy. That would be far more sensible than googling miscarriage rates!

SolidarityGdansk Mon 16-Oct-17 09:38:04

i don’t think this is the best time to go on a diet. But try to eat healthily so that you don’t put on any weight you can’t easily shed afterwards.

Nancy91 Mon 16-Oct-17 09:38:14

First of all, congratulations!

Worrying about this isn't going to be helpful, so stop googling it! That's just going to scare you and stress you out more.

Just start eating healthily now, take those pregnancy vitamins and get enough sleep. Be as active as you can.

I hope it all goes well for you - be positive, this is an exciting time smile

Madbum Mon 16-Oct-17 09:40:00

Hi OP I carried to full term heavier than you my BMI was and still is very high, chances are that this pregnancy will progress normally. Miscarriages are very common no matter what size a woman is it could happen to her.
I really recommend slimming world while you’re pregnant, you might have to get a letter from your GP to sign up though, you can pretty much eat as much potatoes and pasta as you want.

HateSummer Mon 16-Oct-17 09:40:53

Although it’s true overweight mothers may have more complex pregnancies, it won’t be the only reason why you miscarried. Be kind to yourself. It wasn’t your fault. I was a fit 26 year old well within my bmi when I miscarried a few times.

Follow your doctors advice regarding excercise and food and think positively. Be happy!

User5trillion Mon 16-Oct-17 09:42:01

I was similar stats to you when I had my ds. I am sorry about your miscarriage, positive thoughts, step away from Google and keep the faith. Its really hard I know, I worried all the way to 12-weeks then all the way to the end!

Good luck

Expectingbsbunumber2 Mon 16-Oct-17 09:47:14

I've seen people on here so slimming world while pregnant.

mayhew Mon 16-Oct-17 10:00:49

On the positive side, you are under 40!
Most miscarriage has an unknown cause and happens at all BMI. It's just that the frequency increases a little with higher BMI
There are some positive steps you can take
No smoking
No alcohol
Improving the quality of your diet
Improving your fitness.

All of these have an impact on successful outcomes

DeadButDelicious Mon 16-Oct-17 10:09:54

I'm a size 24 and had a successful pregnancy last year, following a 20 week loss the year before, it had nothing to do with my weight, she was very poorly. Take care of yourself, eat the right things, take your vitamins and try not to worry. You can ask for extra monitoring if you are concerned, they will probably get you to do a diabetes test but being plus size doesn't mean you will have it, I didn't have it. They may keep an eye on your blood pressure as well.

mindutopia Mon 16-Oct-17 10:15:53

Please try not to stress and worry. Loss unfortunately is very common. I'm a size 16/18. I had a mc in April as well and I was pregnant again in May. I'm now 23 weeks with a healthy baby (this is my 2nd, perfectly healthy pregnancy the first time around as well). You are not an unusually unhealthy weight and sadly, most often miscarriage is just a weird flaw in cell division because something genetic just wasn't right. It happens to most women who have more than one pregnancy at some point in their lives. Try to stay positive and if you can book yourself in for an early private scan. Those first few weeks were really hard. I wasn't even sure if I was excited when I found out I was pregnant after the mc. I was more in shock, but not immediately happy (even though we were actively trying and this baby was very much planned). But it's been very healing and the early scan was very reassuring.

AnUtterIdiot Mon 16-Oct-17 10:19:06

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Jumblebee Mon 16-Oct-17 10:28:33

@lookingforthecorkscrew I really hope everything goes well for you flowers

I'm in a similar boat weight wise, tall but still a size 20 and worried that as this time round my birth will be much harder.

Since finding out my BMI is just over 40 I have seen a nutritionist and it's kind of been the kick up the backside I needed to start eating healthily. Not counting calories but writing down every thing I eat and trying to make better choices.

I had morning sickness too and only carbs helped. During that time I just ate whatever I could eat and didn't worry so much about weight.

Hope you're feeling happier soon smile

PrincessaCarrisi Mon 16-Oct-17 10:42:43

Step away from google!

I'm a very similar age and size to you, am currently 36 weeks and have had a normal pregnancy.
I'm under consultant led care, so have been offered extra growth scans, and have made a real effort to not use pregnancy as an excuse to mainline all of the food. Carbs and beige food got me through the 1st trimester so I haven't been entirely successful wink
If you are feeling particularly anxious I really recommend talking to your midwife or GP, they can refer you to a perinatal mental health team. I know mums dealing with all kinds of issues who have really found this helpful.
Good luck, and keep posting here if you need to

BillBrysonsBeard Mon 16-Oct-17 11:15:25

My BMI was 39 and I got pregnant the first time, I never considered weight to be a factor in us being unsuccessful! I think because I've seen shows about women who are 50/60 stone who have babies.

AnUtterIdiot Mon 16-Oct-17 11:28:16

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FourForYouGlenCoco Mon 16-Oct-17 11:44:08

I'm so sorry about your miscarriage OP. I really, really doubt it had anything to do with your weight, please don't blame yourself. Ive had 3 mc with a BMI in 'normal' range, there are a million reasons it can happen. Your chances of everything being fine this time are very very good, people have healthy babies when much heavier than you. I think in the first trimester you just have to do what you can to get through without feeling too awful, but maybe have a look/ start a collection of healthy recipes for once you're (hopefully!) feeling better in a few months' time.
I think you need to be on a higher dose of folic acid (I believe 5mg but could be completely wrong) so maybe give your GP a quick ring so they can prescribe it for you (saves you having to take hundreds of the normal-dose folic acid pills!)
Very best of luck flowers and congratulations!

Laura2018 Mon 16-Oct-17 12:18:25

Congratulations 🌸 Why not do something positive for your baby and yourself and start slimming world instead of stressing xx all the best

lookingforthecorkscrew Mon 16-Oct-17 12:41:57

Thanks so much for all the supportive comments. We have had a very stressful year and some issues are still ongoing. Committing to Slimming World feels overwhelming right now, but I’ll keep it in mind.

Ct17218 Mon 16-Oct-17 13:53:57

I was a bit of a chubber when I fell pregnant and have only got chubbier since, but I’m following g sw. It was hard in the 1st trimester but it’s easier now I’m 22wks!

Being over weight does have added risks but you can still have a healthy baby! Look as tess holiday!

Just try and make good choices when you can xxx

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