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Pregnancy after miscarriage

(26 Posts)
maxine412 Sun 15-Oct-17 00:11:51

Hi everyone,

Last month September 2017 I had a chemical pregnancy and early miscarriage at 5 weeks.

I’ve now just found out I’m pregnant again but so worried - I keep getting sharp pains like period pain and scared it’s going to happen again. I feel like it’s either period pain or gassy cramps.

I want this so much and feel like I’m stressing over everything which doesn’t help. Did anyone else have any of these symptoms? sad

emvy Sun 15-Oct-17 09:25:46

Just to confirm, you did get a negative pregnancy test after your miscarriage?

I'm pregnant after two miscarriages this year. One missed and one natural. I'm 14 weeks and I still get horrible panicky moments that this is all going to go wrong. Your worries are completely normal, as is cramping early on. I even bled in the early days of this pregnancy (although I didn't know I was pregnant at the time) and I still get the odd cramp even now. Leading up to that 12 week scan is the most worrying time you'll ever go through, in my experience (after early losses in any case) and I really hope you have a nice easy pregnancy and get some reassuring symptoms soon. Head over to the pregnant after miscarriage thread as there is lots of support there smile all the best to you x

Maincat Sun 15-Oct-17 16:20:05

Hi maxine412,

I took just found out I am pregnant, after a miscarriage 15 months ago. It took so long to get back to anywhere normal, and a long time to conceive again and I am constantly worrying that the same thing will happen. You're not alone! Try to stay positive and calm. I'm just taking each week at a time and making sure life is as stress free as possible.

I too have had lots of cramps and sharp pains, and a little blood but the doctor assures me this is all normal and so I am going to do my best to believe her! Good luck xx

Ilovechocolate111 Sun 15-Oct-17 16:39:56

Your not alone. I mc on 3rd September and found out I'm now 5 weeks pregnant. Every cramp or little pain I panic. I'm constantly sat on the loo waiting to wipe red! I petrified I will mc as I've already had 5. All the best. And hope your ok. Always here of if you need to talk xx

Ilovechocolate111 Sun 15-Oct-17 16:39:57

Your not alone. I mc on 3rd September and found out I'm now 5 weeks pregnant. Every cramp or little pain I panic. I'm constantly sat on the loo waiting to wipe red! I petrified I will mc as I've already had 5. All the best. And hope your ok. Always here of if you need to talk xx

speakfriendandenter Sun 15-Oct-17 18:00:32

I had a miscarriage in July, now about 5weeks. I know increased hormones are making me an emotional mess but I'm constantly second guessing stuff and worrying x

maxine412 Sun 15-Oct-17 21:30:51

Thank you everyone. I’m really scrutinising everything because it’s something we want so much. Scared every time I go to the toilet and worried about going through the heartbreak again. I hope everything is ok but these little cramps are really scary as I just want everything to run smoothly ;( xxxx

crumpledwand Sun 15-Oct-17 21:38:22

flowers for you OP I remember this feeling all to well. I had 4 miscarriages before I had my pfb and I've had 2 miscarriages since. Don't have much advice because I remember just wanting to kill anyone who even dared utter the words "atleast you know you can get pregnant" but I've always been told that's a very promising thing. Just try and take it easy it's beyond your control but the kindest thing you can do is relax your body needs it now more then ever it is very soon after your miscarriage to be pregnant again the hospital usually advise waiting for a complete cycle but that doesn't mean to say this will be the same 1 miscarriage does not guarantee another. X

WhyTheHeckMe Sun 15-Oct-17 22:50:56

Hi OP, I also miscarried at 5/6 weeks in July. I caught again immediately after and went through the horrendous emotions that you are. I clung to the statistics that it's unlikely to happen twice in a row. I'm now 13 weeks pregnant.
Not going to lie I've not enjoyed the first trimester one bit as I realised it can all be taken away so fast
I've paid for private fortnightly scans up till 12 weeks and am now trying to be less mental.
Congratulations and wishing you all the best :-)

emvy Mon 16-Oct-17 06:23:56

I also fell pregnant immediately after my last miscarriage. Between my first and second miscarriage, it took 2 months. I lost that pregnancy. This time, I was pregnant again within 5 weeks. We didn't wait because medically you don't have to, you just need to have had a negative test so you know it's a new pregnancy. Basically, what I'm saying is, falling pregnant again immediately makes no difference - this baby is doing better than all the others despite no cycle inbetween! I would just try and keep as busy as you can x

maxine412 Mon 16-Oct-17 10:08:29

So would you say I’m more likely to lose this baby because I’ve fallen pregnant straight away? After the chemical pregnancy my doctor said to try straight away as there was no reason not too.

I just want to be okay. Sick of being a paranoid mess and analysing every pain and cramp

crumpledwand Mon 16-Oct-17 11:25:59

A miscarriage is not more or less likely a 2nd time around if after you've had more then one miscarriage that following miscarriages become more probable atleast that's what I was always told by my doctor. There is absolutely no reason that you shouldn't carry a healthy full term baby the best way to keep an eye on what's going on is ask your doctor for blood work so your hgc levels can be monitored ultrasounds are amazing but they only give a snap shot of what is happening right now. Wish you all the best.

WhyTheHeckMe Mon 16-Oct-17 12:47:18

Hi OP I was told the opposite to what you're thinking. That actually the odds off having 2 mc / chemicals in a row are unlikely. I know lots of people who mc but then have gone on to have healthy second pregnancies.I caught immediately and like I say I'm now 13 weeks and have had no issues this time. Good luck x

emvy Mon 16-Oct-17 20:56:14

No, what I was saying OP was that you're no more likely to have a miscarriage because you've conceived immediately. It makes no difference. My example (which wasn't clear obviously, sorry!), was that I'm currently still carrying a healthy baby (as far as I can tell) at 14+ weeks despite conceiving immediately after my last miscarriage.

In terms of two happening in a row - I've read mixed things online but have never medically been told anything other than, "you're much more likely to go on to have a successful pregnant next time than you are an unsuccessful one." I'm pretty sure the odds remain at 1 in 4 regardless but don't quote me on that exactly. Please try not to stress too much - this is not in your control. All you can do is accept you are pregnant right now and be thankful for that. Everything else will happen as nature intends, regardless of how much you're obsessing about it x

emvy Mon 16-Oct-17 21:29:27

That sounded far more blunt than I wanted it to, sorry. I know how hard this is - how much you're second guessing everything and trying to find answers and clues as to what the future might hold. The first trimester is so so difficult and there is just no way of knowing. Miscarriage sucks all the joy out of early pregnancy and it's such an emotional rollercoaster. Just look after yourself, keep busy while you feel well enough, and I really hope this all works out for you x

Flatwhite31 Sun 22-Oct-17 20:41:34

I had a missed miscarriage at 12 weeks on 23rd August. My baby was dead at the 12 week scan, despite being perfectly fine at an 8 week scan. My body still isn't back to normal, with quite a bit of random bleeding and only 2 day long periods. I'm having blood tests on Tuesday to check my hormone levels, as I just know something isn't right. We've had no success trying again so far. I've cried every day since losing our baby. It's hard. My heart is broken into a million pieces.

Helbelle75 Sun 22-Oct-17 21:22:06

Miscarriage is such a devastating thing, yet there is very little support out there.
I've been where you are. I had a mmc in may 2016 at 11 weeks, was pregnant again in July and was anxious the whole way through my (very healthy) pregnancy. Make sure you tell your midwife, they are used to dealing with anxious mums to be. I also had to go in a few times for reduced movement and the antenatal unit were lovely. It's entirely normal to worry, but try not to let it spoil your pregnancy. I used to say - I'm pregnant right now - and kind of try to live in the moment . It was a lot better in a way when I could feel her move .
Our dd is perfect and arrived in April.

flatwhite have you thought about counselling? I changed the moment I knew my baby has died. My life was turned upside down. I went to cruse (referred by my gp) and it really helped. Although the grief never goes, i am learning to deal with it.

Flatwhite31 Sun 22-Oct-17 21:39:46

Thanks @Helbelle75. I'd be delighted to be pregnant two months later, but we are not unfortunately. I know being pregnant would help enormously, but my body isn't back to normal, and the time this is taking is killing me. I have absolutely no symptoms before my periods, and they have only lasted 2 days. I then bleed on and off, which I know isn't normal. My body literally feels empty all the time. Apologies if this comes across as insensitive, but at least you had the reassurance of getting pregnant again so quickly in terms of knowing your body was working. I don't even have that sad. As for the midwife, my midwife was so lacking in compassion I wrote an official complaint (as advised by my GP, who was extremely shocked at the poor care) so there is absolutely no way I'm going to confide anything in them. They were utterly useless, and I've lost all trust in them.

Helbelle75 Sun 22-Oct-17 21:51:09

Sorry, the frst part of my post was in response to the OP. I didn't mean to come across as insensitive. I know we were really lucky and am grateful for that every day. I remember the heartache even during those couple of months.
That's such as shame about your midwife and I'm pleased the gp was understanding. I hope the blood tests bring some sort of answers that are easily resolved. Will you let us know how you get on.

Flatwhite31 Sun 22-Oct-17 21:53:13

No worries @Helbelle75, it was me who said that I didn't want to come across as insensitive. I've considered counselling, but I'm a teacher with no free evenings Mon-Fri, so it's difficult to find time. I also know being pregnant would help hugely, and counselling can't make me pregnant, so not sure if it's worth it for me.

Helbelle75 Sun 22-Oct-17 22:25:26

I'm a teacher too. Do school know? I had to have a couple of weeks off after my mmc as I couldn't face the children. I love working with them, but they weren't mine. School were very supportive in allowing me time off to have counselling.
I do so hope everything works out for you.

Maincat Sun 22-Oct-17 22:46:53

Flatwhite31 - you're not alone. I had a mc at 7 weeks and it took 4 months for my periods to return. 15 months, and a lot of sadness, later I've just fallen pregnant again. It feels like a long wait and for a lot of that time I thought I could only feel better by conceiving again.

It's not easy and it won't necessarily be quick. The only advice I have is to be kind to yourself and try to make time to do things which help you relax/breathe. I'm also a teacher and I know how hard it is with workload but remember to look after your well-being. Unfortunately we can't control our bodies and I've realised that the stress and heartbreak wouldn't get me pregnant any quicker. Allow yourself time to grieve and try not to make pregnancy the be all and end all (easier said than done I know) xxx

Flatwhite31 Mon 23-Oct-17 07:00:04

Yes school know @Helbelle75. My MMC happened at the end of the school holidays, so I had 11 days to process it all before going back. I took one day off last half term when I got my first period because I felt awful and couldn't stop crying, but that's it. My workload is horrendous. I've even had to quit my one hobby (choir) as I'm too tired to do it now. It's half term this week and I've hardly made any plans as I'm just too exhausted. My birthday was on Friday, but I didn't even acknowledge it really, and I got DH to postpone my birthday weekend away as I was too knackered. I was in bed by half 9.

Thank you @Maincat. Congratulations on your pregnancy. I have to say I am worried it'll take me a while. I don't have age on my side either (just turned 32) so that worries me. How do you feel about being pregnant again?

Maincat Mon 23-Oct-17 08:34:11

@flatwhite31 I'm 34! I feel very nervous and although this is what I've been excited for in some ways I feel worse as I'm now terrified of going through the horror again. I ended up having 4 weeks of school last time as my mc was complicated, and I was very traumatised afterwards.

It's taken a long time to feel ok(ish) emotionally, but it's taken my body a long time to recover. I've spent the past 6 months having tests only to be told my progesterone is do low that I must not be ovulating anymore...this only fuels my paranoia about the viability of this pregnancy.

The only thing I've learnt os to try and let go of the need to control it all and accept that if I'm kind to myself my body will heal and stabilise.

School is a life-sucker. Get signed off if you need time to process things, and don't be afraid to say no to anything above and beyond teaching/planning/marking. Your life and happiness is just as important. Xxx

Presh12345 Mon 23-Oct-17 08:58:03

I'm just turned 39, MMC in June at 9 weeks. Teacher also.
Worried that it was my one chance as it hasn't happened since despite being told "you're more fertile after a mc"

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