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Social worker?

(30 Posts)
hlfayers Fri 06-Oct-17 19:42:41

Hey everyone.
I received a letter today saying next week I will be home visited by a social worker due to some information they have received and that they would like to do a assessment and see if I am getting the support I need.

I can only assume this is about the health visitor meeting I had the other day where I told her about my unborn babies father and how he has been really quite unsupportive and nasty during my pregnancy,and how when he sees her it will be at my house as I don't trust him.
There is nothing else this could be about in my mind.

I'm just looking for some advice on what to expect from one of these?
I'm sick with worry so any help would be amazing.
Thank you

Crownandheelshigh Fri 06-Oct-17 19:45:10

Hello. I had this.
I completely understand how u feel. It's a rubbish feeling but honestly they do just do there best for you xxx

Neverknowing Fri 06-Oct-17 19:50:22

I understand this must be horrible op.
They are there for you though, they're not against you despite what we her sometimes. They will help you with anything you need so be honest with them smile

Rainallday Fri 06-Oct-17 19:50:39

You've done the right thing being honest about him. They will just be checking that you're ok and seeing if there's anything extra that they can do to support and protect you and the baby. I know it's easier said than done but try not to worry as it will probably just be a cup of tea and a chat. It's good to have extra people looking out for you when you're going through something like this.

DancingLedge Fri 06-Oct-17 19:58:15

Their only concern is to help you protect your baby from someone who you don't trust.
They will try to help you.
It's an uncomfortable situation, but try to work with them- you're both on the same side here.

Ttbb Fri 06-Oct-17 20:07:38

It's most likely about the father. Don't worry too much.

hlfayers Fri 06-Oct-17 20:24:42

If you don't mind me asking what was your situation and what did they talk about with you?
I'm just really worried what they will ask xx

Crownandheelshigh Fri 06-Oct-17 20:31:30

Abusive ex partner.

They just asked for back ground info like history etc, if I thought he was a risk to baby.
Then they put a plan in place where everyone who works with me basically meets up once a month to check that everyone's doing there job. Xxx

hlfayers Fri 06-Oct-17 20:44:09

Thank you for your help it's made me feel a lot better.
I just wasn't sure on what they would be asking me about!
I suppose all I can do is just tell them why I don't trust him and see how they can help me xxx

Crownandheelshigh Fri 06-Oct-17 20:54:29

They will help I promise. Feel free to private message me.
I'll try reply when I can but I've got a seven week old preemie so it's often late at night I reply xxx

hlfayers Fri 06-Oct-17 20:56:37

Thank you ever so much,I think I will message you once I've had the meeting if that's ok with you? Be nice to have that support.
Hope everything with your little one is ok!xx

Wellandtrulyoutnumbered Fri 06-Oct-17 20:59:03

It will be fine. HV should have told you she was doing this and given you an opportunity to ask questions.

myusernameisnotmyusername Fri 06-Oct-17 21:03:00

I had a visit due to really bad anxiety. It made my anxiety worse at the time but she was really nice. She referred me to a centre where there were lots of baby groups to make sure I had lots of support around me and that was that.

hlfayers Fri 06-Oct-17 21:07:47

I know how you feel my anxiety is through the roof because of this.
Mainly because all that was said on the letter is they had been given information and would like to talk about it. So I'm left in the dark,
The only thing It could be though is my meeting with my health visitor as that's when I brought stuff up!

myusernameisnotmyusername Fri 06-Oct-17 21:11:34

That’s all it will be. It won’t be anything to worry about.

TwinkleStars15 Fri 06-Oct-17 21:33:51

I'm a social worker and it's lovely to see all the supportive messages being given to the op - indeed we only want to support families and keep them together, despite what is often portrayed in the media. Be honest and it'll be fine, we're here to help and if we don't think you need it we'll wave you goodbye, if we think you do we'll put a plan in place. Your HV really should have told you she was making the referral though, that is not okay and I would say (politely) that you would have preferred it if she informed you of her plans.

Crownandheelshigh Sat 07-Oct-17 02:27:51

That's not a problem.

Everything's good with him.
He's just fighting a viral infection at the moment bless him xxx

MINEareCRAFTy Sat 07-Oct-17 11:36:17

I agree that it was poor practice for the HV not to inform you. I work in mental health services and always have a duty to inform if I need to make a referral. Good luck and you will be fine smile

hlfayers Wed 11-Oct-17 19:37:37

UPDATE:
My meeting is tomorrow but I have been informed by my health visitor that she did not refer me as she saw no issues with me but that she had been contacted by the social worker and has been informed this meeting is about my babies dad. I'm assuming something to do with his past or something he has done recently.

What can I expect from this now?
I've had no contact with him for about 3 months now but I have told him before he can see his child once she's born at my house and I'm scared that they will see that as me putting her at risk.

Any advice?

TwinkleStars15 Wed 11-Oct-17 21:09:48

You need to wait and find out what the issues are first OP, how do you know that it'll be safe for him to see her at your house when you don't know what it is they are worried about?

hlfayers Wed 11-Oct-17 22:03:32

If they deemed him unsafe to see her obviously my number 1 action would be to not have him see her,or to take the advice of the social worker on what's the best thing to do

user1493413286 Wed 11-Oct-17 22:11:55

They’ll ask your permission to speak with the health visitor and it’s positive that you don’t already decided that contact would be supervised by you based on husband curren behaviour.
They’ll want to know what you’ll do based on whatever they tell you and give you advice about what’s you need to do to keep your baby safe from him.

Princesspinkgirl Wed 11-Oct-17 23:19:19

TwinkleStars15 not all see help so dont make the op think that's true
#forced adoption child snatchers

DancingLedge Thu 12-Oct-17 17:57:02

Please don't bring that stuff here Princess- it's not helpful, and cruelly unkind to an anxious parent.

hlfayers Thu 12-Oct-17 17:59:31

Thought I'd update you all.

I've been made aware that my babies dad has gotten himself into trouble with drugs,now that they have spoken to me and know I no way want him having contact they now have to talk to him.

I'm terrified because he will no doubt get defensive and start some stuff up about me as revenge!

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